@mastodontears.bsky.social
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Hey bb I just finished bronze but was reminded how I didn’t even put you on the podium, I know you were pissed off when I went off-piste but I’m a biathlete I gotta shoot my shot again for the gold with you
February 10, 2026 at 5:25 PM
Hey bb I just finished bronze but was reminded how I didn’t even put you on the podium, I know you were pissed off when I went off-piste but I’m a biathlete I gotta shoot my shot again for the gold with you
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Game 7 of the Leafs-Sharks Stanley Cup Finals: Suddenly, Rick James' "Superfreak" rings out around the rink. From above the rink, the booming voice of Rick James declares, "There shall be no more Stanley Cups awarded; I, Rick James, command it be so!" The crowd and players flee in terror.
February 10, 2026 at 1:09 AM
Game 7 of the Leafs-Sharks Stanley Cup Finals: Suddenly, Rick James' "Superfreak" rings out around the rink. From above the rink, the booming voice of Rick James declares, "There shall be no more Stanley Cups awarded; I, Rick James, command it be so!" The crowd and players flee in terror.
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nfl trying to explain to conservatives that they hired the #1 most streamed artist on spotify "in order to make money"
February 10, 2026 at 1:26 AM
nfl trying to explain to conservatives that they hired the #1 most streamed artist on spotify "in order to make money"
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where have you gone yukio mishima
a nation turns its lonely eyes to you
whooo whooo whooo
a nation turns its lonely eyes to you
whooo whooo whooo
February 9, 2026 at 2:18 AM
where have you gone yukio mishima
a nation turns its lonely eyes to you
whooo whooo whooo
a nation turns its lonely eyes to you
whooo whooo whooo
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NFL: I consent
Bad Bunny: I consent
GUL DUKAT: isn't there somebody you forgot to ask
Bad Bunny: I consent
GUL DUKAT: isn't there somebody you forgot to ask
February 9, 2026 at 1:27 AM
NFL: I consent
Bad Bunny: I consent
GUL DUKAT: isn't there somebody you forgot to ask
Bad Bunny: I consent
GUL DUKAT: isn't there somebody you forgot to ask
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The funny thing is Gears of War was always pretty woke if you actually played the games but the right doesn't freak out about about it to the same extent as shit like Tomb Raider or Horizon Zero Dawn because the marketing was roided out dudes instead of women
Gears of War is woke now! Gears of War! because the person doing an ethnic purge of the subhuman mutants in a society which has to engineer birthrates because otherwise everyone will be forcibly impregnated by monsters is a woman!
February 8, 2026 at 9:24 PM
The funny thing is Gears of War was always pretty woke if you actually played the games but the right doesn't freak out about about it to the same extent as shit like Tomb Raider or Horizon Zero Dawn because the marketing was roided out dudes instead of women
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In any other administration the editorial pages would be heavy with calls for Lutnick to resign. But our media has become billionaire deformed and scandal normed.
NYT gets around to reporting what has been on the front pages of papers around the world for the last week, but still is nowhere to be seen in major US broadcasts: Howard Lutnick, Trump's billionaire commerce secretary, interacted with Jeffrey Epstein regularly over at least 13 yrs while they lived
Files Detail Epstein’s Dealings With Commerce Secretary Howard Lutnick
www.nytimes.com
February 8, 2026 at 5:10 PM
In any other administration the editorial pages would be heavy with calls for Lutnick to resign. But our media has become billionaire deformed and scandal normed.
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Or shit written about league of legends characters. which is different -WHICH IS DIFFERENT-from the halo novels I read in middle school
February 8, 2026 at 3:44 AM
Or shit written about league of legends characters. which is different -WHICH IS DIFFERENT-from the halo novels I read in middle school
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THE REPUBLICANS STARTED THIS MID-DECADE REDISTRICTING UNDER THE RATHER CHILDISH DELUSION THAT THEY WOULD GERTYMANDER DEMOCRATS, BUT THAT DEMOCRATS WOULDN'T GERRYMANDER THEM BACK
THEY HAVE SOWED THE WIND
THEY SHALL REAP THE WHIRLWIND
THEY HAVE SOWED THE WIND
THEY SHALL REAP THE WHIRLWIND
February 7, 2026 at 6:46 PM
THE REPUBLICANS STARTED THIS MID-DECADE REDISTRICTING UNDER THE RATHER CHILDISH DELUSION THAT THEY WOULD GERTYMANDER DEMOCRATS, BUT THAT DEMOCRATS WOULDN'T GERRYMANDER THEM BACK
THEY HAVE SOWED THE WIND
THEY SHALL REAP THE WHIRLWIND
THEY HAVE SOWED THE WIND
THEY SHALL REAP THE WHIRLWIND
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I agree that this is shocking and I urge Republican Representatives from Virginia to introduce a national gerrymandering ban in the House immediately; I also urge the senate to censure Ted Cruz for his disgraceful amicus on the subject.
February 7, 2026 at 2:29 PM
I agree that this is shocking and I urge Republican Representatives from Virginia to introduce a national gerrymandering ban in the House immediately; I also urge the senate to censure Ted Cruz for his disgraceful amicus on the subject.
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it's always a little funny when a massive world-historic tragedy winds up being a huge win for exactly one intended victim
What a disgrace.
ICE may have handed a suspect in the largest jewelry heist in American history a free pass by deporting him before he ever faced trial.
This is the result of Stephen Miller’s chaos. Reckless mismanagement that undermines public safety and makes a mockery of the justice system.
ICE may have handed a suspect in the largest jewelry heist in American history a free pass by deporting him before he ever faced trial.
This is the result of Stephen Miller’s chaos. Reckless mismanagement that undermines public safety and makes a mockery of the justice system.
Prosecutors stunned as ICE lets suspect in $100m jewelry heist leave US
Jeson Nelon Presilla Flores, charged with stalking armored truck in 2022, allowed to self-deport to South America
www.theguardian.com
February 7, 2026 at 8:05 AM
it's always a little funny when a massive world-historic tragedy winds up being a huge win for exactly one intended victim
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you’ve heard of valentine’s day. you've heard of galentine’s day. now get ready for alentine’s day. a day devoted to the pure love of unlikely labour leadership contender al carns
February 6, 2026 at 9:22 PM
you’ve heard of valentine’s day. you've heard of galentine’s day. now get ready for alentine’s day. a day devoted to the pure love of unlikely labour leadership contender al carns
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WHEN I WAS
A YOUNG FED
MY CO
TOOK ME INTO THE CITY
TO SEE AN APARTMENT RAID
HE SAID SON WHEN
YOU GROW UP
WILL YOU BE
A KILLER OF CIVILIANS
A BEATER OF YOUR WIFE
HE SAID WILL YOU
DEFEAT THEM
WILL STANCIL
AND ALL THE NONBELIEVERS
IN THEIR HONDA FITS
A YOUNG FED
MY CO
TOOK ME INTO THE CITY
TO SEE AN APARTMENT RAID
HE SAID SON WHEN
YOU GROW UP
WILL YOU BE
A KILLER OF CIVILIANS
A BEATER OF YOUR WIFE
HE SAID WILL YOU
DEFEAT THEM
WILL STANCIL
AND ALL THE NONBELIEVERS
IN THEIR HONDA FITS
Was this very mid-2000s emo person press-ganged into ICE servitude?
February 6, 2026 at 5:17 AM
WHEN I WAS
A YOUNG FED
MY CO
TOOK ME INTO THE CITY
TO SEE AN APARTMENT RAID
HE SAID SON WHEN
YOU GROW UP
WILL YOU BE
A KILLER OF CIVILIANS
A BEATER OF YOUR WIFE
HE SAID WILL YOU
DEFEAT THEM
WILL STANCIL
AND ALL THE NONBELIEVERS
IN THEIR HONDA FITS
A YOUNG FED
MY CO
TOOK ME INTO THE CITY
TO SEE AN APARTMENT RAID
HE SAID SON WHEN
YOU GROW UP
WILL YOU BE
A KILLER OF CIVILIANS
A BEATER OF YOUR WIFE
HE SAID WILL YOU
DEFEAT THEM
WILL STANCIL
AND ALL THE NONBELIEVERS
IN THEIR HONDA FITS
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I'm beginning to think Biden didn't release the Epstein files because somebody figured it's just too convenient to be believable, coming from a Democrat.
February 6, 2026 at 6:15 AM
I'm beginning to think Biden didn't release the Epstein files because somebody figured it's just too convenient to be believable, coming from a Democrat.
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krugman is spiking the football and doing an end zone dance
February 6, 2026 at 12:51 AM
krugman is spiking the football and doing an end zone dance
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Also in contrast to how some of the same people treated "college student said something annoying" stories. Just a completely bizarre idea of who has power and what is important.
it's hard to reconcile the international consequences of the Epstein files with how many reactionary centrists seem to want to downplay the files
February 6, 2026 at 12:54 AM
Also in contrast to how some of the same people treated "college student said something annoying" stories. Just a completely bizarre idea of who has power and what is important.
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Kamala Harris ran a good, very aggressive campaign, but started at a significant deficit, and ran headlong into a ocean of misogyny, which has continued to dog her even more post-election, now that people feel empowered to say what they REALLY think about her
February 5, 2026 at 10:49 PM
Kamala Harris ran a good, very aggressive campaign, but started at a significant deficit, and ran headlong into a ocean of misogyny, which has continued to dog her even more post-election, now that people feel empowered to say what they REALLY think about her
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i am trying not to joke about the Epstein stuff because it's so horrible but there's also this ridiculous element where it's like... discovering Dracula is real, he's taken over human society at the highest levels, he's involved in tons of evil and also he's a huge dipshit
February 5, 2026 at 3:43 AM
i am trying not to joke about the Epstein stuff because it's so horrible but there's also this ridiculous element where it's like... discovering Dracula is real, he's taken over human society at the highest levels, he's involved in tons of evil and also he's a huge dipshit
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i remember doing a zine cover featuring a recent x-ray of the aftermath of a frenchman bunker-busting himself with an unexploded artillery shell. i think spice world was in theaters. this happens every year. it's like the swallows returning to capistrano, except it's krupp returning to a french anus
February 5, 2026 at 2:07 AM
i remember doing a zine cover featuring a recent x-ray of the aftermath of a frenchman bunker-busting himself with an unexploded artillery shell. i think spice world was in theaters. this happens every year. it's like the swallows returning to capistrano, except it's krupp returning to a french anus
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After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all
February 4, 2026 at 5:02 PM
After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all
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this might be the most incredible quote I've ever seen
This is bonkers. MAHA 'farmers' with ecoli tainted raw milk admit they really don't know how to make the stuff after all.
"Producing raw milk takes careful planning from a facility and infrastructure standpoint. Unfortunately, we learned this after the fact."
people.com/ballerina-fa...
"Producing raw milk takes careful planning from a facility and infrastructure standpoint. Unfortunately, we learned this after the fact."
people.com/ballerina-fa...
Hannah Neeleman's Ballerina Farm Halts Sale of Raw Milk Due to Bacteria Concerns: Report
Hannah and Daniel Neeleman have paused Ballerina Farm's sale of raw milk following health violations discovered during routine testing. Screenings from summer 2025 showed high levels of coliform, the ...
people.com
February 3, 2026 at 11:54 PM
this might be the most incredible quote I've ever seen