Matt 🇨🇦🍁
@jedistark.bsky.social
The world is chaos, be kind
Stand with 🇵🇸 , 🇺🇦 , 🇲🇽, 🏳️🌈, 🏳️⚧️ & NATO
lvl 54, cis male
Pluviophile
User # 502,024
My Skeets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:pzsxocxkxe7jaxcmmjgsppm3/feed/aaaeckv4i7r5i
Stand with 🇵🇸 , 🇺🇦 , 🇲🇽, 🏳️🌈, 🏳️⚧️ & NATO
lvl 54, cis male
Pluviophile
User # 502,024
My Skeets: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:pzsxocxkxe7jaxcmmjgsppm3/feed/aaaeckv4i7r5i
Pinned
Matt 🇨🇦🍁
@jedistark.bsky.social
· Dec 7
There’s no new normal. There’s nothing normal anymore. There’s regular, weird, freaky and wtf
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
Whoever stole my antidepressants,
I hope you're happy.
I hope you're happy.
August 24, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Whoever stole my antidepressants,
I hope you're happy.
I hope you're happy.
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
I showed my tweets to my mom. She scrolled through like 45 blowjob tweets and didn’t blink. Then she got to one about licking a guy’s butt and she said, “Did you have to make it nasty?”
February 8, 2026 at 1:57 PM
I showed my tweets to my mom. She scrolled through like 45 blowjob tweets and didn’t blink. Then she got to one about licking a guy’s butt and she said, “Did you have to make it nasty?”
No new pictures, where are you mentally
February 6, 2026 at 3:35 AM
No new pictures, where are you mentally
me as a Bluesky therapist
February 6, 2026 at 1:54 AM
me as a Bluesky therapist
Me: by emotionally stable, does being numb count?
Friends: No
Me: shit
Friends: No
Me: shit
February 3, 2026 at 8:50 PM
Me: by emotionally stable, does being numb count?
Friends: No
Me: shit
Friends: No
Me: shit
Men will read this and then say “Fine. I’ll shower.”
Maybe they should shower and get a personality that isn't just blaming women for their failings.
February 3, 2026 at 7:56 PM
Men will read this and then say “Fine. I’ll shower.”
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
hello yes i would like a shitty person to experience a consequence?
idk man fucking any of them surprise me
yes i'll hold
idk man fucking any of them surprise me
yes i'll hold
January 31, 2026 at 5:42 PM
hello yes i would like a shitty person to experience a consequence?
idk man fucking any of them surprise me
yes i'll hold
idk man fucking any of them surprise me
yes i'll hold
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
Me to my friends: Shh, look over there. Don't make it obvious.
My friends:
My friends:
December 24, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Me to my friends: Shh, look over there. Don't make it obvious.
My friends:
My friends:
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
I have some good news. The Muppet Show is coming back.
Well, it’s good news to ME
Well, it’s good news to ME
January 25, 2026 at 2:14 AM
I have some good news. The Muppet Show is coming back.
Well, it’s good news to ME
Well, it’s good news to ME
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
Friend of mine who’s been doomsaying since 1998:
a woman holding a cup of coffee with the hashtag schitts creek
ALT: a woman holding a cup of coffee with the hashtag schitts creek
media.tenor.com
February 23, 2025 at 2:56 AM
Friend of mine who’s been doomsaying since 1998:
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
Her: Can I call you “Daddy”?
Me: Well, we ARE at Olive Garden
Me: Well, we ARE at Olive Garden
January 5, 2025 at 11:32 PM
Her: Can I call you “Daddy”?
Me: Well, we ARE at Olive Garden
Me: Well, we ARE at Olive Garden
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
If you put mozzarella in the fondue you can turn your dinner party into a spiderweb of deliciousness
March 28, 2025 at 9:08 PM
If you put mozzarella in the fondue you can turn your dinner party into a spiderweb of deliciousness
It’s the unexpected joys you find when you live alone. Like never holding in your farts. Ever.
Pure. Joy.
Pure. Joy.
January 21, 2026 at 4:04 AM
It’s the unexpected joys you find when you live alone. Like never holding in your farts. Ever.
Pure. Joy.
Pure. Joy.
You know how some women get upset when you get them flowers because they think you did something wrong? My body is like that when I eat something healthy
January 21, 2026 at 3:23 AM
You know how some women get upset when you get them flowers because they think you did something wrong? My body is like that when I eat something healthy
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
(calling 911) so i already brushed my teeth but i want a little snack should i do it
January 20, 2026 at 3:51 AM
(calling 911) so i already brushed my teeth but i want a little snack should i do it
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
When I say 'the house always wins', I'm not referring to gambling, I'm referring to my plans for the weekend.
January 19, 2026 at 10:55 PM
When I say 'the house always wins', I'm not referring to gambling, I'm referring to my plans for the weekend.
He has spoken
January 19, 2026 at 5:43 PM
He has spoken
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
my dogs simply adore your posts but i’m afraid my cat finds them derivative
January 17, 2026 at 1:53 PM
my dogs simply adore your posts but i’m afraid my cat finds them derivative
“Bold strategy Cotton, let’s see if it works out for ‘em”
That kind of vile, dehumanizing language has no place at a nonviolent demonstration. | Opinion
F-bombs at KC Plaza ICE protest spoiled our peaceful message | Opinion
That kind of vile, dehumanizing language has no place at a nonviolent demonstration. | Opinion
bit.ly
January 16, 2026 at 2:09 PM
“Bold strategy Cotton, let’s see if it works out for ‘em”
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
My very favorite artist is a guy called Rorschach; but he’s very niche— every single one of his paintings is a representation of my mom telling me I’ll never amount to anything.
January 15, 2026 at 12:51 PM
My very favorite artist is a guy called Rorschach; but he’s very niche— every single one of his paintings is a representation of my mom telling me I’ll never amount to anything.
The world: Everything is burning down, people are rioting, democracies are crumbling, dictators are killing…
Meanwhile in Canada:
Meanwhile in Canada:
January 15, 2026 at 1:41 PM
The world: Everything is burning down, people are rioting, democracies are crumbling, dictators are killing…
Meanwhile in Canada:
Meanwhile in Canada:
So dark… are you sure you’re not DC?
Doomed Rabbit To Teach 8-Year-Old About Responsibility https://theonion.com/doomed-rabbit-to-teach-8-year-old-about-responsibility-1819574501/
January 14, 2026 at 4:00 PM
So dark… are you sure you’re not DC?
Reposted by Matt 🇨🇦🍁
Therapist: is it the flying fairy kid again?
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad
January 10, 2026 at 10:11 PM
Therapist: is it the flying fairy kid again?
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad
Captain Hook: he just pisses me off so bad