FauxNewdAlt
@fauxnewdalt.bsky.social
*ALT TEXTS*
pfp: black/white cat face
bp: black/brown/white dog face
~prone to reskeet & delskeet~
(probably)
pfp: black/white cat face
bp: black/brown/white dog face
~prone to reskeet & delskeet~
(probably)
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Pure of heart, dumb of ass.
February 14, 2026 at 7:25 PM
Pure of heart, dumb of ass.
twerking my way back to you, bidet
February 14, 2026 at 7:20 PM
twerking my way back to you, bidet
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I suck at poetry,
Coffee.
Violets are blue,
I suck at poetry,
Coffee.
February 14, 2026 at 5:33 PM
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I suck at poetry,
Coffee.
Violets are blue,
I suck at poetry,
Coffee.
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Bagpipes sound like an instrument invented during an argument.
February 14, 2026 at 1:07 PM
Bagpipes sound like an instrument invented during an argument.
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
🧡 from my squirrel
February 14, 2026 at 3:04 PM
🧡 from my squirrel
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
valentine's day silhouette
February 14, 2026 at 2:48 PM
valentine's day silhouette
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
*wakes and bakes*
February 14, 2026 at 2:48 PM
*wakes and bakes*
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Puzzling before sunrise.
February 14, 2026 at 2:29 PM
Puzzling before sunrise.
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Made up corporate holiday and chill?
February 14, 2026 at 2:13 PM
Made up corporate holiday and chill?
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
“Buckle up, I’ll explain on the way.”
February 14, 2026 at 2:20 PM
“Buckle up, I’ll explain on the way.”
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
some of my thoughts are better left unsaid prolly
Ima say ‘em anyway
Ima say ‘em anyway
February 14, 2026 at 12:00 PM
some of my thoughts are better left unsaid prolly
Ima say ‘em anyway
Ima say ‘em anyway
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
I can't stop the storm but I know how to dance in the rain
February 14, 2026 at 9:13 AM
I can't stop the storm but I know how to dance in the rain
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
I don’t think you’re ready for the perverted side of me
February 14, 2026 at 1:50 PM
I don’t think you’re ready for the perverted side of me
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
I like you. Hope you have a good day.
That’s about all the Valentine’s Day stuff you’re gonna get out of me
That’s about all the Valentine’s Day stuff you’re gonna get out of me
February 14, 2026 at 1:01 PM
I like you. Hope you have a good day.
That’s about all the Valentine’s Day stuff you’re gonna get out of me
That’s about all the Valentine’s Day stuff you’re gonna get out of me
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
recently, my best, juiciest, and certainly my most faithful lover has been my morning naval orange
February 14, 2026 at 1:15 PM
recently, my best, juiciest, and certainly my most faithful lover has been my morning naval orange
Reposted by FauxNewdAlt
Can you claim your cell phone or tablet on your taxes, or nah?
February 14, 2026 at 2:06 PM
Can you claim your cell phone or tablet on your taxes, or nah?
figuratively, i need a new temple
February 14, 2026 at 2:00 PM
figuratively, i need a new temple
freed my mind yet the rest didn’t follow
February 14, 2026 at 1:39 PM
freed my mind yet the rest didn’t follow
can’t rn, drafting a bad punny
February 9, 2026 at 9:54 PM
can’t rn, drafting a bad punny
i draft in your general direction!
February 9, 2026 at 9:04 PM
i draft in your general direction!
*shakes it like a cannabis tincture*
February 9, 2026 at 8:47 PM
*shakes it like a cannabis tincture*