Matt
@coolnessinc.bsky.social
He/Him. I live in Indiana, but not like that. I like books and coffee. I’m a cat person, but I’ll still pet your dog.
Don’t look: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:modcracogimat5hfyc325zsg/feed/aaanunf43yybk
Don’t look: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:modcracogimat5hfyc325zsg/feed/aaanunf43yybk
Pinned
Matt
@coolnessinc.bsky.social
· 18d
People who pack just enough underwear for a trip are psychopaths.
Imagine thinking everything will go perfectly. Wild.
Imagine thinking everything will go perfectly. Wild.
Reposted by Matt
Radical fuckin idea but maybe we let ppl find enjoyment however they can because everything sucks
January 8, 2026 at 11:54 PM
Radical fuckin idea but maybe we let ppl find enjoyment however they can because everything sucks
Reposted by Matt
Funny how much dry january looks like house arrest in my friend group
January 8, 2026 at 3:14 PM
Funny how much dry january looks like house arrest in my friend group
Reposted by Matt
I like to watch horror flicks with my cats so they know how safe and lucky they are to live with me
January 6, 2026 at 12:05 PM
I like to watch horror flicks with my cats so they know how safe and lucky they are to live with me
It’s raining “remind me on Monday” notifications this morning.
January 5, 2026 at 1:25 PM
It’s raining “remind me on Monday” notifications this morning.
Reposted by Matt
Things could be worse [threatening]
January 4, 2026 at 10:45 PM
Things could be worse [threatening]
Reposted by Matt
I wish this weather would fucking stay still already.
January 4, 2026 at 11:41 PM
I wish this weather would fucking stay still already.
Reposted by Matt
a homemade cinnamon roll got me saying things like 'set phasers to yum'
January 4, 2026 at 2:42 PM
a homemade cinnamon roll got me saying things like 'set phasers to yum'
Reposted by Matt
New year. Same eternal void.
January 4, 2026 at 12:06 PM
New year. Same eternal void.
Reposted by Matt
A pill that makes me feel whatever people feel when they wanna show you they can juggle
January 3, 2026 at 4:53 PM
A pill that makes me feel whatever people feel when they wanna show you they can juggle
Reposted by Matt
My resolution to be the coziest person in every room is going very well
January 3, 2026 at 4:56 PM
My resolution to be the coziest person in every room is going very well
Reposted by Matt
Disgruntled implies the existence of datgruntled
January 3, 2026 at 3:25 AM
Disgruntled implies the existence of datgruntled
Reposted by Matt
My dogs would love my posts
January 3, 2026 at 12:01 AM
My dogs would love my posts
My cats wouldn’t even follow me.
My dogs would love my posts
January 3, 2026 at 12:59 AM
My cats wouldn’t even follow me.
Reposted by Matt
Once I get the stitches, it’s over for you snitches.
Once I lose weight, it’s over for you britches.
Once I get some cream from my doctor, it's over for you itches
January 2, 2026 at 6:20 PM
Once I get the stitches, it’s over for you snitches.
Reposted by Matt
when a man is on beta-blockers does he become an alpha male? idk, it’s all greek to me
January 1, 2026 at 9:32 PM
when a man is on beta-blockers does he become an alpha male? idk, it’s all greek to me
Reposted by Matt
Petition to stop so many goddamn tv show characters from dry-swallowing their pills so damn much. All of you are psychos. Why are you like this
January 1, 2026 at 9:37 PM
Petition to stop so many goddamn tv show characters from dry-swallowing their pills so damn much. All of you are psychos. Why are you like this
Reposted by Matt
I’m watching TNG and I think I’m just going to start bellowing like a Klingon all the time. Slightest inconvenience, not just death.
January 1, 2026 at 4:26 AM
I’m watching TNG and I think I’m just going to start bellowing like a Klingon all the time. Slightest inconvenience, not just death.
Not doing a resolution this year. Instead I’m just not responding to text messages.
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!
January 1, 2026 at 3:25 AM
Not doing a resolution this year. Instead I’m just not responding to text messages.
Happy New Year!
Happy New Year!
Reposted by Matt
Next year I’m just gonna fake a vacation and lock my doors for the holidays.
January 1, 2026 at 1:30 AM
Next year I’m just gonna fake a vacation and lock my doors for the holidays.
Reposted by Matt
<dog with a stomach ache> I should eat a blanket !!!
December 31, 2025 at 4:14 PM
<dog with a stomach ache> I should eat a blanket !!!
Reposted by Matt
When I say "Happy New Year to you and yours," I just assume the "yours" are a bunch of cats.
December 31, 2025 at 7:52 PM
When I say "Happy New Year to you and yours," I just assume the "yours" are a bunch of cats.
Reposted by Matt
Incense lit. Problems? Still here but ✨scented✨
December 30, 2025 at 4:17 PM
Incense lit. Problems? Still here but ✨scented✨
Reposted by Matt
RIGHT WING CANDIDATE: Violence is the only answer to stop the cabal of globalist Jews and foreigners.
DEM CANDIDATE: We must fight for democracy
THE MEDIA: Why are liberals calling for violence?
DEM CANDIDATE: We must fight for democracy
THE MEDIA: Why are liberals calling for violence?
December 30, 2025 at 4:36 PM
RIGHT WING CANDIDATE: Violence is the only answer to stop the cabal of globalist Jews and foreigners.
DEM CANDIDATE: We must fight for democracy
THE MEDIA: Why are liberals calling for violence?
DEM CANDIDATE: We must fight for democracy
THE MEDIA: Why are liberals calling for violence?
Reposted by Matt
You should be able to rev your shopping cart at people in the grocery store
December 30, 2025 at 4:44 PM
You should be able to rev your shopping cart at people in the grocery store