The Colgate Comedy Hour
@cerowb.bsky.social
Put whatever you want on your hot dog. It's your hot dog.
Pinned
99% of Bluesky is people telling you how much smarter and cooler they are than all those Bluesky people while lacking the self-awareness to realize that they, too, are a Bluesky person.
The other 1% is Mina Kimes.
The other 1% is Mina Kimes.
Oh gee, guess we'll just continue to do nothing about it and say, "Oh that won't happen because taking over elections is hard!"
🚨BREAKING: Steve Bannon said Tuesday that the federal government is planning to send Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) officers to patrol polling stations during this year’s midterm elections. www.democracydocket.com/news-alerts/...
Steve Bannon says ICE will ‘surround the polls’ as Trump doubles down on taking over elections
Trump doubled down on his comments to nationalize voting Tuesday during an Oval Office press conference. “If you think about it, a state is an agent for the federal government in elections,” Trump sai...
www.democracydocket.com
February 4, 2026 at 5:52 PM
Oh gee, guess we'll just continue to do nothing about it and say, "Oh that won't happen because taking over elections is hard!"
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
Pretty crazy that James Harden has scored more points than all but six players in history and has been totally inconsequential his entire career
February 4, 2026 at 2:45 AM
Pretty crazy that James Harden has scored more points than all but six players in history and has been totally inconsequential his entire career
my lukewarm take is everyone who ever emailed a very powerful and connected guy (who made a point of funding a lot of good research *specifically* to create a shield of goodwill around a himself) after we all knew he was charged with sex crimes can suck it from the back.
my lukewarm take is everyone who ever emailed a very powerful and connected guy (who made a point of funding a lot of good research *specifically* to create a shield of goodwill around a himself) is not automatically guilty of doing all the same crimes he did
My lukewarm take is that anyone who was in the Epstein Files should be drummed out of polite society.
February 4, 2026 at 1:36 AM
my lukewarm take is everyone who ever emailed a very powerful and connected guy (who made a point of funding a lot of good research *specifically* to create a shield of goodwill around a himself) after we all knew he was charged with sex crimes can suck it from the back.
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
ice is killing americans and democrats are still voting for trump's nominees
By a vote of 54-40, the #Senate confirmed the nomination of David Clay Fowlkes to be United States District Judge for the Western District of Arkansas.
Dems voting in favor: Durbin, Hassan, Kaine, Shaheen, and Whitehouse.
Dems voting in favor: Durbin, Hassan, Kaine, Shaheen, and Whitehouse.
February 3, 2026 at 5:24 PM
ice is killing americans and democrats are still voting for trump's nominees
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
The Montreal Canadiens are playing the Minnesota Wild in Minneapolis tonight. The players have been recommended to stay in/eat at the hotel, take the team bus to the arena, and carry passports.
Perhaps we shouldn't be hosting the World Cup and the Olympics...
Perhaps we shouldn't be hosting the World Cup and the Olympics...
Le voyagement est aussi affecté → www.danslescoulisses.com/ice-le-canad...
ICE : le Canadien demande à ses joueurs de ne pas sortir de l’hôtel au Minnesota
Comme vous le savez sans doute, ça brasse malheureusement pas mal au Minnesota. Avec tout ce qui se passe en lien avec la police de l’immigration et les trop nombreux décès qui en découlent…
www.danslescoulisses.com
February 2, 2026 at 5:03 PM
The Montreal Canadiens are playing the Minnesota Wild in Minneapolis tonight. The players have been recommended to stay in/eat at the hotel, take the team bus to the arena, and carry passports.
Perhaps we shouldn't be hosting the World Cup and the Olympics...
Perhaps we shouldn't be hosting the World Cup and the Olympics...
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
Every year I think to myself, "Cell phone video of guys throwing baseballs can't possibly heal me this time. The winter has been too dark, too cold, too long. The world is too depressing." And then every year I am wrong.
February 2, 2026 at 6:07 PM
Every year I think to myself, "Cell phone video of guys throwing baseballs can't possibly heal me this time. The winter has been too dark, too cold, too long. The world is too depressing." And then every year I am wrong.
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
People say we can't compare this to the Third Reich because of the atrocities but we only found out about the atrocities after the fact when it was all said and done and we're not done with this yet so I am sure the worst stomach churning shit has yet to be revealed.
ICYMI: The US is currently holding three times as many people in immigrant detention as were detained in the Nazi concentration camp system in spring 1939 — six years into the Third Reich, and just before the start of World War II.
February 1, 2026 at 10:26 PM
People say we can't compare this to the Third Reich because of the atrocities but we only found out about the atrocities after the fact when it was all said and done and we're not done with this yet so I am sure the worst stomach churning shit has yet to be revealed.
Don’t worry! Chuck Schumer will make sure they get more training! That’s the problem! They just need more training! That’ll fix it!
UTAH auto body shop owner: “You guys broke the fucking window to get in here! Where is your warrant??”
Trump’s ICE goons: “Yes we did… We don’t need one.” 🤔
Rights are gone under this regime.
(From Somali Snaps: www.instagram.com/reel/DUKpzuS...)
Trump’s ICE goons: “Yes we did… We don’t need one.” 🤔
Rights are gone under this regime.
(From Somali Snaps: www.instagram.com/reel/DUKpzuS...)
January 31, 2026 at 6:38 PM
Don’t worry! Chuck Schumer will make sure they get more training! That’s the problem! They just need more training! That’ll fix it!
Based on the ol' timeline, Chuck Schumer either did something good or did something bad. Outrage in both directions. Quite a sight.
January 30, 2026 at 3:51 AM
Based on the ol' timeline, Chuck Schumer either did something good or did something bad. Outrage in both directions. Quite a sight.
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
Literally half the country wants to abolish ICE and the Democrats are going to make them pinky swear not to deport U.S. citizens anymore
January 30, 2026 at 2:32 AM
Literally half the country wants to abolish ICE and the Democrats are going to make them pinky swear not to deport U.S. citizens anymore
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
the feds saying theyll end their campaign of terror against an american city if their demands are met is the biggest domestic scandal of my lifetime
January 29, 2026 at 2:02 PM
the feds saying theyll end their campaign of terror against an american city if their demands are met is the biggest domestic scandal of my lifetime
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
Of the biggest scandals in US history just this week, I think I’d rank them:
1) Federal paramilitaries invade US city based on racist lies, murder US citizens
2) Slush fund for the president from stolen foreign resources held in Qatar
3) Whatever FBI and DNI are doing re: 2020 election in Georgia
1) Federal paramilitaries invade US city based on racist lies, murder US citizens
2) Slush fund for the president from stolen foreign resources held in Qatar
3) Whatever FBI and DNI are doing re: 2020 election in Georgia
January 29, 2026 at 2:52 AM
Of the biggest scandals in US history just this week, I think I’d rank them:
1) Federal paramilitaries invade US city based on racist lies, murder US citizens
2) Slush fund for the president from stolen foreign resources held in Qatar
3) Whatever FBI and DNI are doing re: 2020 election in Georgia
1) Federal paramilitaries invade US city based on racist lies, murder US citizens
2) Slush fund for the president from stolen foreign resources held in Qatar
3) Whatever FBI and DNI are doing re: 2020 election in Georgia
No, no, you see, it’s cool because Chuckie Schumer is going to make them wear name tags and pinky promise to follow the law - so I think we’re all good here.
An extraordinary document. Read it.
“Attached to this order is an appendix that identifies 96 court orders that ICE has violated in 74 cases. … ICE has likely violated more court orders in January 2026 than some federal agencies have violated in their entire existence.”
“Attached to this order is an appendix that identifies 96 court orders that ICE has violated in 74 cases. … ICE has likely violated more court orders in January 2026 than some federal agencies have violated in their entire existence.”
January 29, 2026 at 2:21 AM
No, no, you see, it’s cool because Chuckie Schumer is going to make them wear name tags and pinky promise to follow the law - so I think we’re all good here.
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
this is a straightforward impeachable offense for trump, vance, rubio and every other person down the line who enabled it and the framers would have thought impeachment for it did not go nearly far enough
Marco Rubio: "The oil proceeds are being deposited into an account that ultimately will become a US Treasury blocked account here in the US. We will say 'this is what this money can be spent on.' They will submit to us a budget request -- 'we want to use the money on these things.'"
January 29, 2026 at 12:44 AM
this is a straightforward impeachable offense for trump, vance, rubio and every other person down the line who enabled it and the framers would have thought impeachment for it did not go nearly far enough
Just completely worthless.
SCHUMER says Democrats are “united” behind three DHS reforms
1/ End roving patrols; tighten the rules on warrants and require ICE to coordinate with local authorities.
2/ Enforce accountability; a uniform code of conduct.
3/ Require masks off, body cameras on, agents carry ID.
1/ End roving patrols; tighten the rules on warrants and require ICE to coordinate with local authorities.
2/ Enforce accountability; a uniform code of conduct.
3/ Require masks off, body cameras on, agents carry ID.
January 28, 2026 at 8:42 PM
Just completely worthless.
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
there is a post from the US gov 'department of war' on here that includes video of them actually murdering people and threatening to murder more people & it's been up since november
Yeah. The Bluesky app has a zero tolerance policy towards wishing death on people.
January 27, 2026 at 10:31 PM
there is a post from the US gov 'department of war' on here that includes video of them actually murdering people and threatening to murder more people & it's been up since november
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
I don't remember this part of the Schoolhouse Rock cartoon
Trump: "China will be sending me a bill very shortly supporting year round E15 to my desk, and I will sign it without delay"
January 27, 2026 at 11:32 PM
I don't remember this part of the Schoolhouse Rock cartoon
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
there is no earthly reason to believe that these goons will comply with any new regulations! it’s like if I put a sign on my door ordering the pines not to drop their needles! they’re pines and those needles will drop! zero funding, “reform” my ass, this guy must be stopped
Word is from NBC that instructions from Mr. Schumer to his caucus are: “restrain, reform and restrict ICE.” 1/ www.nbcnews.com/politics/con...
Senate Democrats plot strategy as DHS standoff deepens heading into shutdown week
Two sources who were on a Democratic caucus strategy call Sunday said Minority Leader Chuck Schumer told the group the message must be to “restrain, reform and restrict ICE.”
www.nbcnews.com
January 27, 2026 at 12:47 PM
there is no earthly reason to believe that these goons will comply with any new regulations! it’s like if I put a sign on my door ordering the pines not to drop their needles! they’re pines and those needles will drop! zero funding, “reform” my ass, this guy must be stopped
Oh wow, something dramatic has happened around Naomi Osaka?
So weird. That never happens.
So weird. That never happens.
January 27, 2026 at 12:53 AM
Oh wow, something dramatic has happened around Naomi Osaka?
So weird. That never happens.
So weird. That never happens.
Reposted by The Colgate Comedy Hour
Put this Make-a-Wish-ass Nazi on a rocket into the fucking sun
BREAKING Greg Bovino has been removed as Border Patrol "commander at large" and will return to El Centro Calif, where he is expected to retire soon. A stunning turnaround after Pretti killing. Bovino's traveling blue city crackdown is over www.theatlantic.com/politics/202...
Gregory Bovino Gets Demoted
The Border Patrol chief was the public face of a traveling immigration crackdown on cities governed by Democrats.
www.theatlantic.com
January 26, 2026 at 11:46 PM
Put this Make-a-Wish-ass Nazi on a rocket into the fucking sun
Did they start letting Josina Anderson pick Pro Bowl replacements?
[Schultz] Browns QB Shedeur Sanders has been added to the Pro Bowl roster as a replacement.
Sanders is the first 5th-round rookie to make a Pro Bowl since Puka Nacua. twitter.com/Schultz_Repo...
Sanders is the first 5th-round rookie to make a Pro Bowl since Puka Nacua. twitter.com/Schultz_Repo...
January 26, 2026 at 6:23 PM
Did they start letting Josina Anderson pick Pro Bowl replacements?
Good for Sam Darnold, man. Time to put to bed the narrative that ‘He can’t win the big one.’
January 26, 2026 at 2:53 AM
Good for Sam Darnold, man. Time to put to bed the narrative that ‘He can’t win the big one.’
Somewhere, Mina Kimes is overturning furniture.
January 26, 2026 at 1:58 AM
Somewhere, Mina Kimes is overturning furniture.
As always, I feel it's important to note that Jake Bobo's father IS indeed Mike Bobo, but not THAT Mike Bobo.
It's a Devin Hester Jr. situation.
It's a Devin Hester Jr. situation.
January 26, 2026 at 1:45 AM
As always, I feel it's important to note that Jake Bobo's father IS indeed Mike Bobo, but not THAT Mike Bobo.
It's a Devin Hester Jr. situation.
It's a Devin Hester Jr. situation.
Oh, so this is one of those times replay assists CANT be used to review a penalty.
What makes it different than the times replay assists CAN be used to review a penalty? Nobody knows!
What makes it different than the times replay assists CAN be used to review a penalty? Nobody knows!
January 26, 2026 at 12:23 AM
Oh, so this is one of those times replay assists CANT be used to review a penalty.
What makes it different than the times replay assists CAN be used to review a penalty? Nobody knows!
What makes it different than the times replay assists CAN be used to review a penalty? Nobody knows!