Katie
@ughwhatnow.bsky.social
Middle aged weirdo and unapologetic waffleholic.
Reposted by Katie
My bed doesn’t even have the courtesy to make me sound more interesting than I am.
December 5, 2023 at 12:54 PM
My bed doesn’t even have the courtesy to make me sound more interesting than I am.
Reposted by Katie
If you cry into the drive-thru speaker long enough, they’ll give you a free coffee, is something I just learned.
December 5, 2023 at 10:40 AM
If you cry into the drive-thru speaker long enough, they’ll give you a free coffee, is something I just learned.
Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.
December 5, 2023 at 9:52 AM
Shout-out to my embarrassingly squeaky ass bed frame that makes me sound more popular than I actually am to my neighbors.
People that do Thanksgiving morning Turkey Trots are my exact opposite counterparts.
You're up at the ass crack of dawn to run while dressed as a turkey?
I'm still laying in bed trying to devise a way to make my roomba bring me coffee.
You're up at the ass crack of dawn to run while dressed as a turkey?
I'm still laying in bed trying to devise a way to make my roomba bring me coffee.
November 23, 2023 at 3:01 PM
People that do Thanksgiving morning Turkey Trots are my exact opposite counterparts.
You're up at the ass crack of dawn to run while dressed as a turkey?
I'm still laying in bed trying to devise a way to make my roomba bring me coffee.
You're up at the ass crack of dawn to run while dressed as a turkey?
I'm still laying in bed trying to devise a way to make my roomba bring me coffee.
Don't mind me, I sometimes just forget this place exists.
November 19, 2023 at 5:23 PM
Don't mind me, I sometimes just forget this place exists.
*hours of just hanging out in silence*
10: I've been thinking,mom. You shouldn't worry about all your gray hair because it's actually more of a florescent white, and white hair is cool.
10: I've been thinking,mom. You shouldn't worry about all your gray hair because it's actually more of a florescent white, and white hair is cool.
November 2, 2023 at 11:35 PM
*hours of just hanging out in silence*
10: I've been thinking,mom. You shouldn't worry about all your gray hair because it's actually more of a florescent white, and white hair is cool.
10: I've been thinking,mom. You shouldn't worry about all your gray hair because it's actually more of a florescent white, and white hair is cool.
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As a kitchen mook, this is incredibly infuriating at a restaurant. Yeah Steve, I know your softball team could only meet up at 9:27 at the local bar and grill, so maybe wait til the next day you asshats. You never know what unhinged line cook is memorizing your faces and planning dark designs.
November 2, 2023 at 11:28 PM
As a kitchen mook, this is incredibly infuriating at a restaurant. Yeah Steve, I know your softball team could only meet up at 9:27 at the local bar and grill, so maybe wait til the next day you asshats. You never know what unhinged line cook is memorizing your faces and planning dark designs.
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MAGICIAN: Is this your card?
ME: Oh my gosh yes!
MAGICIAN: It's been declined. Do you have another way to pay the deposit for your kid's party?
ME: Oh my gosh yes!
MAGICIAN: It's been declined. Do you have another way to pay the deposit for your kid's party?
October 26, 2023 at 8:41 PM
MAGICIAN: Is this your card?
ME: Oh my gosh yes!
MAGICIAN: It's been declined. Do you have another way to pay the deposit for your kid's party?
ME: Oh my gosh yes!
MAGICIAN: It's been declined. Do you have another way to pay the deposit for your kid's party?
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SERIAL KILLER: prepare to die
ME: thanks, you too
ME: thanks, you too
September 28, 2023 at 8:44 AM
SERIAL KILLER: prepare to die
ME: thanks, you too
ME: thanks, you too
What I mean when I say I'm lookin' like a snacc:
September 17, 2023 at 1:18 PM
What I mean when I say I'm lookin' like a snacc:
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Hear me out: what if you DIDN’T act like a giant shithead today?
September 13, 2023 at 1:01 PM
Hear me out: what if you DIDN’T act like a giant shithead today?
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her: what do you do for a living
me: I can’t tell you
her: like a spy
me: no I’m an eye doctor
her: oh an ophthalmologist
me: yeah thanks I don’t know how to pronounce it
me: I can’t tell you
her: like a spy
me: no I’m an eye doctor
her: oh an ophthalmologist
me: yeah thanks I don’t know how to pronounce it
September 10, 2023 at 9:36 PM
her: what do you do for a living
me: I can’t tell you
her: like a spy
me: no I’m an eye doctor
her: oh an ophthalmologist
me: yeah thanks I don’t know how to pronounce it
me: I can’t tell you
her: like a spy
me: no I’m an eye doctor
her: oh an ophthalmologist
me: yeah thanks I don’t know how to pronounce it
Reposted by Katie
Football season is upon us once again and I think it’s time I remind everyone that the word “huddle” is just a combination of the words “hug” & “cuddle”, so, do what you will with that
September 10, 2023 at 12:12 AM
Football season is upon us once again and I think it’s time I remind everyone that the word “huddle” is just a combination of the words “hug” & “cuddle”, so, do what you will with that
There are two wolves inside of me
and they are both comatose from all the sugar in my diet.
and they are both comatose from all the sugar in my diet.
September 10, 2023 at 2:27 PM
There are two wolves inside of me
and they are both comatose from all the sugar in my diet.
and they are both comatose from all the sugar in my diet.
I lose so much hair all the time and everywhere, that I need to come to terms with the fact that my DNA will eventually turn up at a crime scene.
September 9, 2023 at 5:13 AM
I lose so much hair all the time and everywhere, that I need to come to terms with the fact that my DNA will eventually turn up at a crime scene.
I chose my specific apartment for the great big windows and ALL THE NATURAL LIGHT and VIEWS.
I also keep the drapes closed all day so I can see the TV.
I also keep the drapes closed all day so I can see the TV.
September 7, 2023 at 1:56 AM
I chose my specific apartment for the great big windows and ALL THE NATURAL LIGHT and VIEWS.
I also keep the drapes closed all day so I can see the TV.
I also keep the drapes closed all day so I can see the TV.
Oh, you don't believe that manifesting your hearts truest desires is a real thing?
Then explain to me why I work directly across the street from both a bookstore AND a fudge shop?
Then explain to me why I work directly across the street from both a bookstore AND a fudge shop?
September 5, 2023 at 2:49 PM
Oh, you don't believe that manifesting your hearts truest desires is a real thing?
Then explain to me why I work directly across the street from both a bookstore AND a fudge shop?
Then explain to me why I work directly across the street from both a bookstore AND a fudge shop?
Reposted by Katie
Passion is short for passive aggression
September 2, 2023 at 2:10 PM
Passion is short for passive aggression
Reposted by Katie
How many years should a panic-attack last?
August 24, 2023 at 8:32 PM
How many years should a panic-attack last?
*People shopping in my store is my literal livelihood *
(People walk in)
(In my head) How DARE you?
(People walk in)
(In my head) How DARE you?
August 31, 2023 at 8:51 PM
*People shopping in my store is my literal livelihood *
(People walk in)
(In my head) How DARE you?
(People walk in)
(In my head) How DARE you?
*Team building icebreaker*: share something that changed your life for the better.
Them:
My kids!
The day I met my wife!
Getting my Master's degree!
Me: Habanero white cheddar cheese!
Them:
My kids!
The day I met my wife!
Getting my Master's degree!
Me: Habanero white cheddar cheese!
August 29, 2023 at 3:20 PM
*Team building icebreaker*: share something that changed your life for the better.
Them:
My kids!
The day I met my wife!
Getting my Master's degree!
Me: Habanero white cheddar cheese!
Them:
My kids!
The day I met my wife!
Getting my Master's degree!
Me: Habanero white cheddar cheese!
Reposted by Katie
I can't wait until they get DMs around here and married people can start having internet sex again
August 27, 2023 at 5:23 PM
I can't wait until they get DMs around here and married people can start having internet sex again