Mister Pants
@misterpants.bsky.social
Human man person. Your best friend. Connoisseur of frozen pizza. Local Kingpin. Taken.
Pants dropping: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ggl5mwnmwvf67h5ucwhwx6aj/feed/aaaixdamqwjna
Pants dropping: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:ggl5mwnmwvf67h5ucwhwx6aj/feed/aaaixdamqwjna
Pinned
Mister Pants
@misterpants.bsky.social
· Jun 27
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE read before you follow me.
If you are a blue wave never trump resister etc please do not follow me.
It’s NOT because I disagree with you, it’s because this is my fun shit posting account. I hate to block you but I’m going to. Thank you.
If you are a blue wave never trump resister etc please do not follow me.
It’s NOT because I disagree with you, it’s because this is my fun shit posting account. I hate to block you but I’m going to. Thank you.
Sometimes the world is just. too. much.
August 22, 2025 at 11:48 PM
Sometimes the world is just. too. much.
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Tucking my micro penis in here
August 22, 2025 at 11:34 PM
Tucking my micro penis in here
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i’ll ignore you’re typo if you’ll ignore mind oh goddammit
August 22, 2025 at 4:46 PM
i’ll ignore you’re typo if you’ll ignore mind oh goddammit
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a dry wall screw is me having sex with a carpenter and/or painter send post
August 22, 2025 at 1:13 PM
a dry wall screw is me having sex with a carpenter and/or painter send post
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don’t sleep on hot nerds
August 22, 2025 at 1:13 PM
don’t sleep on hot nerds
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My grandpa kept a pic of Vanna White on his fridge next to all the grandkids school pics like she was just one of our cousins.
August 22, 2025 at 1:24 PM
My grandpa kept a pic of Vanna White on his fridge next to all the grandkids school pics like she was just one of our cousins.
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you think giving me one of those hideous pandora bracelets will flatter me? it’s a charm offensive . folks,,
August 22, 2025 at 11:39 AM
you think giving me one of those hideous pandora bracelets will flatter me? it’s a charm offensive . folks,,
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The way I see it, you have 2 choices: you can go with the grain, or you can go against the grain. Or you can eat a bowl of pasta while watching the 20 Minute Workout on a VHS tape. Three. You have 3 (three) choices.
August 22, 2025 at 11:46 AM
The way I see it, you have 2 choices: you can go with the grain, or you can go against the grain. Or you can eat a bowl of pasta while watching the 20 Minute Workout on a VHS tape. Three. You have 3 (three) choices.
Reposted by Mister Pants
Ties you up and makes you listen to me play the harmonica.
August 22, 2025 at 11:57 AM
Ties you up and makes you listen to me play the harmonica.
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ironically, the last thing i bought at Bed, Bath & Beyond before they went under was curtains 😬
August 22, 2025 at 11:58 AM
ironically, the last thing i bought at Bed, Bath & Beyond before they went under was curtains 😬
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A fun thing about Bluesky is wondering why you don’t have any notifications and then remembering that you forgot to post.
August 22, 2025 at 12:04 PM
A fun thing about Bluesky is wondering why you don’t have any notifications and then remembering that you forgot to post.
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gotta remember to tell my kids that when I die they need to go into my notes app and post all of my unskeeted skeets as a special post mortem treat for all of you
August 22, 2025 at 12:28 PM
gotta remember to tell my kids that when I die they need to go into my notes app and post all of my unskeeted skeets as a special post mortem treat for all of you
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My response whenever a manager asks in Teams or email for ways we could improve the user experience:
August 22, 2025 at 12:19 PM
My response whenever a manager asks in Teams or email for ways we could improve the user experience:
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Look, I’ve done some questionable shit in my day but I’ve never ever used a drywall screw in a structural and/or exterior situation
August 22, 2025 at 11:26 AM
Look, I’ve done some questionable shit in my day but I’ve never ever used a drywall screw in a structural and/or exterior situation
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Not nearly enough kissing in football, imo
August 22, 2025 at 2:18 AM
Not nearly enough kissing in football, imo
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life would be so much easier if everyone just realized I’m always right about everything
August 22, 2025 at 10:50 AM
life would be so much easier if everyone just realized I’m always right about everything
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Me flirting: my hands smell like basil and tomatoes from the garden, let’s make sauce.
August 21, 2025 at 3:06 PM
Me flirting: my hands smell like basil and tomatoes from the garden, let’s make sauce.
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The news is exhausting anymore but then you finally see a horrible person has died and that helps some
August 21, 2025 at 3:35 PM
The news is exhausting anymore but then you finally see a horrible person has died and that helps some
Reposted by Mister Pants
You can only love someone as much as they’re willing to receive it.
August 21, 2025 at 2:17 PM
You can only love someone as much as they’re willing to receive it.
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I haven't been around because I'm developing a new treatment option that involves going to sleep for two years and waking up well. It's going to be wildly popular, expensive, and y'all can say you knew me when
August 21, 2025 at 2:17 PM
I haven't been around because I'm developing a new treatment option that involves going to sleep for two years and waking up well. It's going to be wildly popular, expensive, and y'all can say you knew me when
Reposted by Mister Pants
People hate when you do selfish things like protect your own mental health.
August 21, 2025 at 1:54 PM
People hate when you do selfish things like protect your own mental health.
Reposted by Mister Pants
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August 21, 2025 at 1:51 PM
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