Michael Cook
@mikecookwrites.bsky.social
Writer of things. Thinker of thingks.
Reposted by Michael Cook
ME: if pee comes out of a penis then a butt should be called a poonis
DR: okay fine stop sticking things up your poonis
DR: okay fine stop sticking things up your poonis
December 6, 2025 at 4:19 AM
ME: if pee comes out of a penis then a butt should be called a poonis
DR: okay fine stop sticking things up your poonis
DR: okay fine stop sticking things up your poonis
Reposted by Michael Cook
Couldn’t Sam Altman just ask ChatGPT how to make itself profitable
December 6, 2025 at 4:38 AM
Couldn’t Sam Altman just ask ChatGPT how to make itself profitable
Reposted by Michael Cook
GB News now broadcasting calls to remove the ethnic minority MPs from parliament
December 3, 2025 at 7:07 PM
GB News now broadcasting calls to remove the ethnic minority MPs from parliament
Reposted by Michael Cook
what's next, i wonder.
Maybe: Rachel Reeves *claims* to be wearing black tights, but if you look carefully you will see they are in fact very very very very very very very dark blue.
Maybe: Rachel Reeves *claims* to be wearing black tights, but if you look carefully you will see they are in fact very very very very very very very dark blue.
December 3, 2025 at 12:47 PM
what's next, i wonder.
Maybe: Rachel Reeves *claims* to be wearing black tights, but if you look carefully you will see they are in fact very very very very very very very dark blue.
Maybe: Rachel Reeves *claims* to be wearing black tights, but if you look carefully you will see they are in fact very very very very very very very dark blue.
Reposted by Michael Cook
Nigel Farage was a racist bully at school but Rachel Reeves won the wrong chess championship so who can say who is worse?
December 2, 2025 at 9:59 PM
Nigel Farage was a racist bully at school but Rachel Reeves won the wrong chess championship so who can say who is worse?
Reposted by Michael Cook
Reposted by Michael Cook
Badenoch: "HIKING TAXES TO PAY FOR WELFARE!"
Er. Yes. You see, you take money from people who have money, and use it to pay for things for everyone and help people who have too little money. That's... the whole point?
Er. Yes. You see, you take money from people who have money, and use it to pay for things for everyone and help people who have too little money. That's... the whole point?
November 26, 2025 at 1:57 PM
Badenoch: "HIKING TAXES TO PAY FOR WELFARE!"
Er. Yes. You see, you take money from people who have money, and use it to pay for things for everyone and help people who have too little money. That's... the whole point?
Er. Yes. You see, you take money from people who have money, and use it to pay for things for everyone and help people who have too little money. That's... the whole point?
Reposted by Michael Cook
Believe Nigel Farage about anything and you need to give your head a wobble ….
“I would never ever do it in a hurtful or insulting way”
Nigel Farage responds to allegations of racist behaviour from when he was a teenager at school
@itvnewspolitics.bsky.social
Nigel Farage responds to allegations of racist behaviour from when he was a teenager at school
@itvnewspolitics.bsky.social
November 24, 2025 at 7:28 PM
Believe Nigel Farage about anything and you need to give your head a wobble ….
Reposted by Michael Cook
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
It was years ago.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not in a hurtful way.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not with intent.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not genuine abuse.
😮🫣😬😱 ~AA
It was years ago.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not in a hurtful way.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not with intent.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not genuine abuse.
😮🫣😬😱 ~AA
November 24, 2025 at 7:36 PM
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
It was years ago.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not in a hurtful way.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not with intent.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not genuine abuse.
😮🫣😬😱 ~AA
It was years ago.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not in a hurtful way.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not with intent.
Did you ever racially abuse fellow pupils?
Not genuine abuse.
😮🫣😬😱 ~AA
Reposted by Michael Cook
As everyone has said, an excellent call. It also makes me think Starmer should appoint Rylan Clark or Danny Dyer as UK ambassador to the US.
Trump in a room with a very charismatic person results in like half a day of Trump agreeing with everything that person said, so this has the potential to be very, very funny.
Trump says he’s meeting with “communist” Mamdani at the White House on Friday
November 21, 2025 at 10:10 PM
As everyone has said, an excellent call. It also makes me think Starmer should appoint Rylan Clark or Danny Dyer as UK ambassador to the US.
Reposted by Michael Cook
Girls in Lenton, Nottingham, UK
1989
📷 Tony Davis
1989
📷 Tony Davis
November 19, 2025 at 5:34 PM
Girls in Lenton, Nottingham, UK
1989
📷 Tony Davis
1989
📷 Tony Davis
Reposted by Michael Cook
interviewer: how are your listening skills?
me: absolutely
me: absolutely
January 15, 2025 at 8:19 PM
interviewer: how are your listening skills?
me: absolutely
me: absolutely
Reposted by Michael Cook
When I arrive at the party
November 19, 2025 at 5:53 AM
When I arrive at the party
Reposted by Michael Cook
A radio programme like the Shipping Forecast but it’s called Bin Day and it just reads out every single council in the country’s bin schedule
November 10, 2025 at 11:53 PM
A radio programme like the Shipping Forecast but it’s called Bin Day and it just reads out every single council in the country’s bin schedule
Reposted by Michael Cook
Wondering why everything seems shit and you have no money compared with 10 years ago?
This is a big part of why:
This is a big part of why:
Brexit reduced the UK’s GDP by between 6% and 8%. That is MASSIVE. #ProjectFear #wetoldyouso
www.nber.org/papers/w3445...
www.nber.org/papers/w3445...
November 10, 2025 at 9:24 PM
Wondering why everything seems shit and you have no money compared with 10 years ago?
This is a big part of why:
This is a big part of why:
Reposted by Michael Cook
Billie Piper announced as the new BBC Director General but we've got to wait until next Christmas to find out why.
November 9, 2025 at 6:42 PM
Billie Piper announced as the new BBC Director General but we've got to wait until next Christmas to find out why.
Reposted by Michael Cook
Reposted by Michael Cook
Nigel Farage currently railing against Parliament being full of "professional politicians".
He founded UKIP in 1993 and was first elected as an MEP in 1999, twenty-six years ago. Less than 5% of current MPs (31 to be precise) have a longer career in politics than Farage. ~AA
He founded UKIP in 1993 and was first elected as an MEP in 1999, twenty-six years ago. Less than 5% of current MPs (31 to be precise) have a longer career in politics than Farage. ~AA
November 3, 2025 at 11:36 AM
Nigel Farage currently railing against Parliament being full of "professional politicians".
He founded UKIP in 1993 and was first elected as an MEP in 1999, twenty-six years ago. Less than 5% of current MPs (31 to be precise) have a longer career in politics than Farage. ~AA
He founded UKIP in 1993 and was first elected as an MEP in 1999, twenty-six years ago. Less than 5% of current MPs (31 to be precise) have a longer career in politics than Farage. ~AA
Reposted by Michael Cook
Daniel Hannan was born in Peru.
November 2, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Daniel Hannan was born in Peru.
Reposted by Michael Cook
Apparently it's okay to be sick of the UK and become an immigrant elsewhere but somehow it's not okay for people to be sick of their countries and become an immigrant in the UK.
October 29, 2025 at 7:59 PM
Apparently it's okay to be sick of the UK and become an immigrant elsewhere but somehow it's not okay for people to be sick of their countries and become an immigrant in the UK.
Reposted by Michael Cook
star trek: the next generation, but Computer has an obsequious attitude like ChatGPT
picard: computer, locate commander data
computer: that's a great idea, captain! it really shows initiative that you're seeking to locate a possible explanation for the behavior of the force fields. i can certainl-
picard: computer, locate commander data
computer: that's a great idea, captain! it really shows initiative that you're seeking to locate a possible explanation for the behavior of the force fields. i can certainl-
October 29, 2025 at 5:55 PM
star trek: the next generation, but Computer has an obsequious attitude like ChatGPT
picard: computer, locate commander data
computer: that's a great idea, captain! it really shows initiative that you're seeking to locate a possible explanation for the behavior of the force fields. i can certainl-
picard: computer, locate commander data
computer: that's a great idea, captain! it really shows initiative that you're seeking to locate a possible explanation for the behavior of the force fields. i can certainl-
Reposted by Michael Cook
Wow - those are quite phenomenal headlines given the details of the story.
Ahh look, he’s just a ‘nerdy’ guy. No harm done.
You need to scroll down to paragraph 13 of the Sky piece to find the full story!
🧵
1/9
Ahh look, he’s just a ‘nerdy’ guy. No harm done.
You need to scroll down to paragraph 13 of the Sky piece to find the full story!
🧵
1/9
October 29, 2025 at 1:06 PM
Wow - those are quite phenomenal headlines given the details of the story.
Ahh look, he’s just a ‘nerdy’ guy. No harm done.
You need to scroll down to paragraph 13 of the Sky piece to find the full story!
🧵
1/9
Ahh look, he’s just a ‘nerdy’ guy. No harm done.
You need to scroll down to paragraph 13 of the Sky piece to find the full story!
🧵
1/9
Reposted by Michael Cook
Asylum seekers, housed in hotels in Manchester, are reaching out in their own words to address the concerns of the local community.
Please take a minute to read their letter, & share it with the people in your life who need to hear the truth about the people they are protesting.
Please take a minute to read their letter, & share it with the people in your life who need to hear the truth about the people they are protesting.
October 27, 2025 at 11:41 AM
Asylum seekers, housed in hotels in Manchester, are reaching out in their own words to address the concerns of the local community.
Please take a minute to read their letter, & share it with the people in your life who need to hear the truth about the people they are protesting.
Please take a minute to read their letter, & share it with the people in your life who need to hear the truth about the people they are protesting.
Reposted by Michael Cook
Something I can't get over with the Sarah Pochin comments is that it's not just racist, it's also pathetic? Like oh wittle Sarah doesn't like the wittle adverts is it? Get a grip, you're a grown woman and member of parliament, stop being a snowflake and find a real problem to deal with
October 26, 2025 at 9:30 PM
Something I can't get over with the Sarah Pochin comments is that it's not just racist, it's also pathetic? Like oh wittle Sarah doesn't like the wittle adverts is it? Get a grip, you're a grown woman and member of parliament, stop being a snowflake and find a real problem to deal with