Kicker of Elves
@kickerofelves.bsky.social
College engineering-communication teacher, lifelong musician, word nerd, empath
“Surrounding yourself with ‘yes’ men is how you end up with Star Wars prequels.” — former student
“Surrounding yourself with ‘yes’ men is how you end up with Star Wars prequels.” — former student
My gift to you is a reminder that this is a thing that exists. 🎄 🐟 💙
December 24, 2025 at 2:50 AM
My gift to you is a reminder that this is a thing that exists. 🎄 🐟 💙
“Love is all you need,” sang a band that existed before WiFi.
December 18, 2025 at 3:44 AM
“Love is all you need,” sang a band that existed before WiFi.
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
And did absolutely nothing to stop them.
November 25, 2025 at 8:07 PM
And did absolutely nothing to stop them.
“Every day you do something stupider than you did the day before. And I think, "There's no possible way he can top that." But what do you do?! You find a way, dammit, to top it!”
* Stanley to Michael on The Office
* Also me to the MSU football team just now
* Stanley to Michael on The Office
* Also me to the MSU football team just now
November 16, 2025 at 3:10 AM
“Every day you do something stupider than you did the day before. And I think, "There's no possible way he can top that." But what do you do?! You find a way, dammit, to top it!”
* Stanley to Michael on The Office
* Also me to the MSU football team just now
* Stanley to Michael on The Office
* Also me to the MSU football team just now
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
a “Space Force”, if you will
November 13, 2025 at 2:27 PM
a “Space Force”, if you will
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
Years ago I was suspended on Twitter for inviting Marco Rubio to swallow ten D batteries, which I don’t see how it could be a threat; he and I were not even in the same room and I have at most six D batteries on hand
November 14, 2025 at 6:25 PM
Years ago I was suspended on Twitter for inviting Marco Rubio to swallow ten D batteries, which I don’t see how it could be a threat; he and I were not even in the same room and I have at most six D batteries on hand
During a class discussion some years ago, a student said, “Surrounding yourself with ‘yes’ men is how you end up with Star Wars prequels.” I think about this at least once per week.
November 14, 2025 at 9:49 PM
During a class discussion some years ago, a student said, “Surrounding yourself with ‘yes’ men is how you end up with Star Wars prequels.” I think about this at least once per week.
(Low-stakes) things that need to be industry-standard:
(1) Athletes introducing themselves à la NFL Sunday Night Football
(2) Blooper reels — and the more serious/gloomy the film/show, the better
(1) Athletes introducing themselves à la NFL Sunday Night Football
(2) Blooper reels — and the more serious/gloomy the film/show, the better
November 14, 2025 at 9:43 PM
(Low-stakes) things that need to be industry-standard:
(1) Athletes introducing themselves à la NFL Sunday Night Football
(2) Blooper reels — and the more serious/gloomy the film/show, the better
(1) Athletes introducing themselves à la NFL Sunday Night Football
(2) Blooper reels — and the more serious/gloomy the film/show, the better
Newish song: “Kiwi Parade Gloss.” Enjoy! 💥😊 youtu.be/LqvYwmlUch8?...
Kiwi Parade Gloss
YouTube video by John Brocato
youtu.be
July 15, 2025 at 2:56 AM
Newish song: “Kiwi Parade Gloss.” Enjoy! 💥😊 youtu.be/LqvYwmlUch8?...
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
Hello. I live in Los Angeles. The president is lying.
June 8, 2025 at 9:54 PM
Hello. I live in Los Angeles. The president is lying.
I used Google Translate on this German game-show screen and I honestly could not be happier.
May 16, 2025 at 7:23 PM
I used Google Translate on this German game-show screen and I honestly could not be happier.
You are my partner in crime. And when I say “you,” I mean Jeni’s Gooey Butter Cake Ice Cream. And when I say “crime,” I mean a 55-gallon drum.
May 10, 2025 at 3:06 PM
You are my partner in crime. And when I say “you,” I mean Jeni’s Gooey Butter Cake Ice Cream. And when I say “crime,” I mean a 55-gallon drum.
Was not counting on far-right wackos* to come up with the raddest band name in decades, but everyone please put your hands together for WOKE MARXIST POPE 🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼🔥🔥🔥
May 9, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Was not counting on far-right wackos* to come up with the raddest band name in decades, but everyone please put your hands together for WOKE MARXIST POPE 🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼🔥🔥🔥
Spoiler alert: we are. 😎 🆒 🧊
May 8, 2025 at 12:02 AM
Spoiler alert: we are. 😎 🆒 🧊
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
[if Chuck Schumer replaced Liam Neeson in Taken]
CHUCK SCHUMER: [on phone] I don’t know who you are or what you want, but I will find you and I will help you kill my daughter
CHUCK SCHUMER: [on phone] I don’t know who you are or what you want, but I will find you and I will help you kill my daughter
March 14, 2025 at 2:36 AM
[if Chuck Schumer replaced Liam Neeson in Taken]
CHUCK SCHUMER: [on phone] I don’t know who you are or what you want, but I will find you and I will help you kill my daughter
CHUCK SCHUMER: [on phone] I don’t know who you are or what you want, but I will find you and I will help you kill my daughter
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
i prefer Mexican Def Leppard because they pour real sugar on you
September 17, 2023 at 5:45 PM
i prefer Mexican Def Leppard because they pour real sugar on you
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
Look at with this annotation and it's just the opposite of shocking.
March 1, 2025 at 6:46 PM
Look at with this annotation and it's just the opposite of shocking.
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
Oakley Introduces Line Of Sunglasses For Front Of Head
http://theonion.com/...
http://theonion.com/...
March 1, 2025 at 8:00 PM
Oakley Introduces Line Of Sunglasses For Front Of Head
http://theonion.com/...
http://theonion.com/...
Reposted by Kicker of Elves
i can’t think of anything to post
𝕊ℍ𝕀ℕ𝔾𝕃𝔼𝕊 𝔻𝕆𝔼𝕊ℕ’𝕋 ℂ𝔸ℝ𝔼
𝕊ℍ𝕀ℕ𝔾𝕃𝔼𝕊 𝔻𝕆𝔼𝕊ℕ’𝕋 ℂ𝔸ℝ𝔼
February 26, 2025 at 9:00 PM
i can’t think of anything to post
𝕊ℍ𝕀ℕ𝔾𝕃𝔼𝕊 𝔻𝕆𝔼𝕊ℕ’𝕋 ℂ𝔸ℝ𝔼
𝕊ℍ𝕀ℕ𝔾𝕃𝔼𝕊 𝔻𝕆𝔼𝕊ℕ’𝕋 ℂ𝔸ℝ𝔼
I cackled. 😂😂😂🎄❤️
December 24, 2024 at 3:53 AM
I cackled. 😂😂😂🎄❤️