Jem 382
jem382.bsky.social
Jem 382
@jem382.bsky.social
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Couple moved in next door. Old bloke lived there before had a beautiful garden. He spent every day in it. New guy ripped out everything & put fake grass in. So I've planted trees next to the boundary that will fill his lawn with dead leaves in the autumn. This one's for you Alf
October 6, 2025 at 8:20 AM
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Currently feeling the agony that only an Essex boy in his late fifties can truly understand as the DJ starts playing Spandau’s “Gold” just as the cab home arrives.
October 4, 2025 at 11:19 PM
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Every motorway service station should have a 5-a-side football pitch. The score should be continuous throughout the day with travellers swapping in and out via infinite subs.
October 4, 2025 at 1:55 PM
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100 days until Christmas.
September 16, 2025 at 6:33 PM
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Because you’re a cunt.
March 17, 2025 at 5:08 PM
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*Leggal
September 9, 2025 at 7:15 PM
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Choose sanity. Vote Binface.
September 4, 2025 at 7:18 AM
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Actually, Frankenstein is a doctor success at the Venice film festival
August 31, 2025 at 12:07 PM
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I’ve often wondered why Nigel Farage, who as godfather of the Brexit fiasco engineered the biggest British foreign policy disaster since Suez is continually offered so much space in some newspapers and broadcast media. Serious question. Thoughts welcome.
August 27, 2025 at 10:46 AM
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Dolly Parton has sent my daughter a new book every month for years as she does for thousands of children. She help fund the development of the Covid vaccine. She’s not a billionaire. I think as non wealthy people it’s hard to even imagine how much billionaires *could* be doing with their money.
August 13, 2025 at 1:51 PM
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Another weird thing about London is that the taxi drivers who used to lecture me furiously about how immigrants were responsible for all the crime would move seamlessly to reminiscing, dewy-eyed, about the Krays.
August 13, 2025 at 7:00 AM
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One of the most urgent crises in the criminal justice system is that allegations of rape and serious sexual offending take five years to reach trial.

Any politician who claims to care about sexual violence and is silent on this issue has another agenda.
August 12, 2025 at 1:09 PM
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aging well, unfortunately 👇
I just want to say for the record that when the history books are written centuries from now, I believe the election of Donald Trump in a free and fair election in 2024 will go down as one of the most senseless and self-destructive own goals in human history
August 11, 2025 at 3:15 PM
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6 days after Soviet troops invaded Czechoslovakia in 1968, a Prague paper published these “10 Commandments”:
‘When a Soviet soldier comes to you, YOU:
1. Don’t know
2. Don’t care
3. Don’t tell
4. Don’t have
5. Don’t know how to
6. Don’t give
7. Can’t do
8. Don’t sell
9. Don’t show
10. Do nothing’
August 12, 2025 at 1:11 AM
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I realised, talking to @architecturetoday.bsky.social, that taking my children on half term trips to look at 1960s civic centres, was probably a sign that I was a @c20society.bsky.social
woman. architecturetoday.co.uk/dispatches-c...
August 5, 2025 at 3:04 PM
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Somehow ended up in possession of a caramel apple, and that’s got to be one of the foods with the widest delta between how fun it would seem and the actual experience of eating it.
August 6, 2025 at 2:36 AM
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This whole story is insane. Tesla apparently did everything it could to avoid providing the data it had about its Autopilot crash. This is just a snippet and there's a lot more. electrek.co/2025/08/04/t...
August 4, 2025 at 5:55 PM
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Using "loose" in place of "lose"
August 12, 2024 at 9:26 PM
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RIP
July 24, 2025 at 5:43 PM
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I hate Virgin broadband I hate them so much. There will be no further news at this time.
July 21, 2025 at 2:30 PM
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"Have Tim Henman killed"
July 13, 2025 at 6:32 PM
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Cross-examiner chef's kiss.
Reporter: Yesterday you said you weren't sure who ordered the munitions halted to Ukraine—have you since been able to figure that out?

Trump: I have not thought about it.

Reporter: What does it say that such a big decision could be made inside your government without you knowing?
July 9, 2025 at 6:01 PM
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It's better every month.
July 9, 2025 at 5:45 PM
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Graph of British Rivers
July 5, 2025 at 12:33 PM
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Think about how insane this is. I know we normalize every abnormal thing Trump does, & he floods the zone & numbs us, but a leading media organizing rolling over & agreeing to pay $16m to the president because he didn’t like how they edited an interview?? What country is this?
BREAKING

Paramount has settled the lawsuit President Trump filed against it for the 60 Minutes interview of Kamala Harris.

Paramount will pay $16 million in total including fees and expenses.

The money, minus fees and expenses, will go to President Trump’s future presidential library.
July 2, 2025 at 5:26 PM