fesshole 🧻
@fesshole.bsky.social
Confess your sins anonymously - will the internet absolve you?
Buy show tickets 2025/6: sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Add confession b3ta.com/addfess
Buy book amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+best+of+fesshole&tag=b3ta-21
Run @robmanuelyeah.bsky.social
Buy show tickets 2025/6: sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Add confession b3ta.com/addfess
Buy book amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+best+of+fesshole&tag=b3ta-21
Run @robmanuelyeah.bsky.social
Pinned
FESSHOLE LIVE TICKETS: Liverpool, Leicester, Leeds, Sweden (Malmö, GÖTEBORG, STOCKHOLM), also Anon Opin In London / Leicester sites.google.com/view/fesshole
BOOK(s): amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+bes...
Add your fess: b3ta.com/addfess
PODCAST: audioboom.com/channels/513...
BOOK(s): amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+bes...
Add your fess: b3ta.com/addfess
PODCAST: audioboom.com/channels/513...
Middle-aged dad. I helped my daughter with her homework, researching Arthropleura, a millipede-like animal that could grow to over 2.5m long. I've been having nightmares about it for the last two nights. I know they're extinct but my dreams don't.
November 10, 2025 at 11:20 PM
Middle-aged dad. I helped my daughter with her homework, researching Arthropleura, a millipede-like animal that could grow to over 2.5m long. I've been having nightmares about it for the last two nights. I know they're extinct but my dreams don't.
I used to go into Lasky's in Brent Cross and reformat the DOS PCs on display. When they removed the format program from the installation I came back with it on a floppy disk. 45 years later I worry if I was why they went bust.
November 10, 2025 at 10:20 PM
I used to go into Lasky's in Brent Cross and reformat the DOS PCs on display. When they removed the format program from the installation I came back with it on a floppy disk. 45 years later I worry if I was why they went bust.
We eloped, and not because I didn't want a big wedding. Couldn't face the idea of my dad giving one of his inspiring speeches. Most notable one to date was at our engagement when he said don't get married and have kids they'll ruin your life.
November 10, 2025 at 9:20 PM
We eloped, and not because I didn't want a big wedding. Couldn't face the idea of my dad giving one of his inspiring speeches. Most notable one to date was at our engagement when he said don't get married and have kids they'll ruin your life.
After our 7th failed round of IVF, I decided that I didn't want kids. Didn't want to upset my wife so kept my mouth shut and paid another round expecting it to fail. Daughters just turned one and is the absolute love of my life. Thank god I'm a conflict avoider
November 10, 2025 at 8:20 PM
After our 7th failed round of IVF, I decided that I didn't want kids. Didn't want to upset my wife so kept my mouth shut and paid another round expecting it to fail. Daughters just turned one and is the absolute love of my life. Thank god I'm a conflict avoider
I have an old iPad which I only use for, ahem, alone time. It has started giving me the average screen time which means I now know, on average, how long my wanks are. I don't know what to do with this information.
November 10, 2025 at 7:20 PM
I have an old iPad which I only use for, ahem, alone time. It has started giving me the average screen time which means I now know, on average, how long my wanks are. I don't know what to do with this information.
I was an irritating little shit who badgered our history teacher mercilessly for details of how the Groom of the Stool would clean the king's ring piece. Enough of the class was interesting in hearing about it that actually she went to the uni library to research details.
November 10, 2025 at 6:20 PM
I was an irritating little shit who badgered our history teacher mercilessly for details of how the Groom of the Stool would clean the king's ring piece. Enough of the class was interesting in hearing about it that actually she went to the uni library to research details.
I declined giving a full time offer job to an intern just because he took the same route home as me on the train and wouldn't let me listen to music alone.
November 10, 2025 at 5:20 PM
I declined giving a full time offer job to an intern just because he took the same route home as me on the train and wouldn't let me listen to music alone.
Subcontracting builder here. Yes we generally do cut corners, take no care in our work and chip off early whenever possible. I'm living proof because I'm the one who left the vacuum cleaner on all night that burned down the Cutty Sark.
November 10, 2025 at 4:20 PM
Subcontracting builder here. Yes we generally do cut corners, take no care in our work and chip off early whenever possible. I'm living proof because I'm the one who left the vacuum cleaner on all night that burned down the Cutty Sark.
Fesshole works by you submitting your confessions. Contribute here: http://b3ta.com/addfess
November 10, 2025 at 4:00 PM
Fesshole works by you submitting your confessions. Contribute here: http://b3ta.com/addfess
Even though I make a very comfortable living from a very good job, I still refuse to pay £5 for one pair of socks. You can fuck right off with that. I remember when £5 could buy you a pack of 10 socks.
November 10, 2025 at 3:20 PM
Even though I make a very comfortable living from a very good job, I still refuse to pay £5 for one pair of socks. You can fuck right off with that. I remember when £5 could buy you a pack of 10 socks.
Me & my husband are separating but we live in the same house still. I have noticed a disgusting long curly white hair growing out of his neck. I deliberately haven't told him - my way of sabotaging his future love prospects, quiet revenge for all the hurt he has caused me.
November 10, 2025 at 2:20 PM
Me & my husband are separating but we live in the same house still. I have noticed a disgusting long curly white hair growing out of his neck. I deliberately haven't told him - my way of sabotaging his future love prospects, quiet revenge for all the hurt he has caused me.
I once licked a switched on 60w incandescent light bulb for a dare. Burned my tongue. Would not recommend.
November 10, 2025 at 1:20 PM
I once licked a switched on 60w incandescent light bulb for a dare. Burned my tongue. Would not recommend.
We had a cat keep coming into our house through the windows. Every time I got it out, it ran down the street to a house. After a while I decided to take it to that house & put it in the window of said house & close it! Found out a few months later it didn't live there.
November 10, 2025 at 12:20 PM
We had a cat keep coming into our house through the windows. Every time I got it out, it ran down the street to a house. After a while I decided to take it to that house & put it in the window of said house & close it! Found out a few months later it didn't live there.
I just texted my cleaner two thumbs up and she texted back asking if I was angry with her. Since when did 👍🏻👍🏻 mean "fuck you"? And why didn't anyone tell me?
November 10, 2025 at 11:20 AM
I just texted my cleaner two thumbs up and she texted back asking if I was angry with her. Since when did 👍🏻👍🏻 mean "fuck you"? And why didn't anyone tell me?
When my girlfriend is out of earshot I close doors without turning the handle. You know, like they were designed to be closed. But she has her own rules.
November 10, 2025 at 10:20 AM
When my girlfriend is out of earshot I close doors without turning the handle. You know, like they were designed to be closed. But she has her own rules.
American colleague told me that they'd just gone through the change. I misunderstood and said that I hoped their doctor was helping them. It turns out I misunderstood and they'd just gone back standard time from summer time.
November 10, 2025 at 9:20 AM
American colleague told me that they'd just gone through the change. I misunderstood and said that I hoped their doctor was helping them. It turns out I misunderstood and they'd just gone back standard time from summer time.
My mum's fess… At a wake after a funeral at a crematorium, everyone was reminiscing with so many favourite, fun and fond tales of the recently deceased. My mum decided to chip in and said, 'Wow, so many stories about him! I bet his ears are burning!'
November 10, 2025 at 8:20 AM
My mum's fess… At a wake after a funeral at a crematorium, everyone was reminiscing with so many favourite, fun and fond tales of the recently deceased. My mum decided to chip in and said, 'Wow, so many stories about him! I bet his ears are burning!'
Fesshole Live is coming to Liverpool, Leicester and Leeds - get your tickets now! We’re also taking the show to Sweden (Malmö, Göteborg, Stockholm) and doing Anon Opin in London and Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
November 10, 2025 at 7:25 AM
Fesshole Live is coming to Liverpool, Leicester and Leeds - get your tickets now! We’re also taking the show to Sweden (Malmö, Göteborg, Stockholm) and doing Anon Opin in London and Leicester. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Live alone. Few IRL social contacts. Left a half finished glass of beer on the kitchen window. Not long after had a small colony of fruit flies. Was going to get rid of it but still feel guilty about what we used to do to them in Biology class so top it up now. It's some company.
November 9, 2025 at 11:20 PM
Live alone. Few IRL social contacts. Left a half finished glass of beer on the kitchen window. Not long after had a small colony of fruit flies. Was going to get rid of it but still feel guilty about what we used to do to them in Biology class so top it up now. It's some company.
When I put cutlery into the drawer I sing to myself "forks knives spoons and friends" to the tune of gypsies, tramps & thieves
November 9, 2025 at 10:20 PM
When I put cutlery into the drawer I sing to myself "forks knives spoons and friends" to the tune of gypsies, tramps & thieves
There's a really nice looking burger place near me. I'd love to try it but just can't get past the poor grammar in the word bun's (sic) in the company's signage.
November 9, 2025 at 9:20 PM
There's a really nice looking burger place near me. I'd love to try it but just can't get past the poor grammar in the word bun's (sic) in the company's signage.
In my last house I hated my neighbours. When I moved I made sure to make the neighbours think I'm a "witch" by placing pentacles on my front door, crystals in the window and I occasionally go outside and howl at the moon. It's worked a treat not one of them has spoken to me yet
November 9, 2025 at 8:20 PM
In my last house I hated my neighbours. When I moved I made sure to make the neighbours think I'm a "witch" by placing pentacles on my front door, crystals in the window and I occasionally go outside and howl at the moon. It's worked a treat not one of them has spoken to me yet
We're (ok, I, Rob) are prepping the Liverpool FESSHOLE LIVE show right now - it's on the 12th. COME. Best of Fesshole, audience confessions, badges, and for the first time ever, assuming the club doesn't tell us not to, LIVE SWEARCLOCK INTRO.
www.hotwatercomedy.co.uk/event/248401...
www.hotwatercomedy.co.uk/event/248401...
Hot Water Comedy Club | Liverpool's Funniest Comedy Clubs
Hot Water Comedy is widely regarded as the UK’s best comedy promoter. Based in Liverpool, where we have two award winning, purpose built comedy venues.
www.hotwatercomedy.co.uk
November 9, 2025 at 7:50 PM
We're (ok, I, Rob) are prepping the Liverpool FESSHOLE LIVE show right now - it's on the 12th. COME. Best of Fesshole, audience confessions, badges, and for the first time ever, assuming the club doesn't tell us not to, LIVE SWEARCLOCK INTRO.
www.hotwatercomedy.co.uk/event/248401...
www.hotwatercomedy.co.uk/event/248401...
Never bothered getting a driving licence or insurance. I just drive carefully. It's been fine for 37 years.
November 9, 2025 at 7:20 PM
Never bothered getting a driving licence or insurance. I just drive carefully. It's been fine for 37 years.
My daughter once asked me "If dad dies of obesity can we have a dog?" Years later I find myself thinking the same only I would do up our embarrassing ramshackle home as he is far too miserly to spend any of our considerable savings on it, and I would get a cat too. Better company
November 9, 2025 at 6:20 PM
My daughter once asked me "If dad dies of obesity can we have a dog?" Years later I find myself thinking the same only I would do up our embarrassing ramshackle home as he is far too miserly to spend any of our considerable savings on it, and I would get a cat too. Better company