fesshole 🧻
@fesshole.bsky.social
Confess your sins anonymously - will the internet absolve you?
Buy show tickets 2025/6: sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Add confession b3ta.com/addfess
Buy book amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+best+of+fesshole&tag=b3ta-21
Run @robmanuel.b3ta.com
Buy show tickets 2025/6: sites.google.com/view/fesshole
Add confession b3ta.com/addfess
Buy book amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+best+of+fesshole&tag=b3ta-21
Run @robmanuel.b3ta.com
Pinned
fesshole 🧻
@fesshole.bsky.social
· Nov 3
FESSHOLE LIVE TICKETS: Liverpool, Leicester, Leeds, Sweden (Malmö, GÖTEBORG, STOCKHOLM), also Anon Opin In London / Leicester sites.google.com/view/fesshole
BOOK(s): amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+bes...
Add your fess: b3ta.com/addfess
PODCAST: audioboom.com/channels/513...
BOOK(s): amazon.co.uk/s?k=very+bes...
Add your fess: b3ta.com/addfess
PODCAST: audioboom.com/channels/513...
I regrettably visited an escort this year. Whilst she was sucking my dick she said "nice" a few times. Each time she said "nice" it reminded me of our dear deceased nan who used to say "nice" when sipping a Baileys or tucking into a Sunday lunch.
January 4, 2026 at 10:20 PM
I regrettably visited an escort this year. Whilst she was sucking my dick she said "nice" a few times. Each time she said "nice" it reminded me of our dear deceased nan who used to say "nice" when sipping a Baileys or tucking into a Sunday lunch.
First time in First Class I said no to the cookies, not sure if they were free. Guy in his 50s wearing a suit said "I'll have his cookies too". Lesson in confidence.
January 4, 2026 at 9:20 PM
First time in First Class I said no to the cookies, not sure if they were free. Guy in his 50s wearing a suit said "I'll have his cookies too". Lesson in confidence.
I sold a flat, on day of exchange buyer said he wanted £5k off. I reluctantly agreed and instantly lost all guilt about neglecting to inform him of the family above always shouting/fighting and banging windows/doors, all made worse by their laminate flooring & kiitchen tiles.
January 4, 2026 at 8:20 PM
I sold a flat, on day of exchange buyer said he wanted £5k off. I reluctantly agreed and instantly lost all guilt about neglecting to inform him of the family above always shouting/fighting and banging windows/doors, all made worse by their laminate flooring & kiitchen tiles.
I'm desperate to get the new Grand theft Auto when it comes out but would feel like a scab given their anti union standpoint. Currently trying to work out how to shoplift it as it's the only moral way to get it.
January 4, 2026 at 7:20 PM
I'm desperate to get the new Grand theft Auto when it comes out but would feel like a scab given their anti union standpoint. Currently trying to work out how to shoplift it as it's the only moral way to get it.
When we bought our house, the garage roof was leaking. The survey didn't catch it and the previous owners knew but didn't tell us. We had to fork out £10k for a new roof. Now, every time we get their post, we chuck it straight in the bin and take great pleasure in doing so.
January 4, 2026 at 6:20 PM
When we bought our house, the garage roof was leaking. The survey didn't catch it and the previous owners knew but didn't tell us. We had to fork out £10k for a new roof. Now, every time we get their post, we chuck it straight in the bin and take great pleasure in doing so.
My Grandad was an avid cricket fan, went all over the world watching England, he passed away at 99 can't help but smiling at the irony of him not quite making the century.
January 4, 2026 at 5:20 PM
My Grandad was an avid cricket fan, went all over the world watching England, he passed away at 99 can't help but smiling at the irony of him not quite making the century.
I am the third wheel in my marriage. My spouse spends every free moment on their phone. I send messages asking if they want a cup of tea; I will often have a cup of tea myself between asking and getting a reply.
January 4, 2026 at 4:20 PM
I am the third wheel in my marriage. My spouse spends every free moment on their phone. I send messages asking if they want a cup of tea; I will often have a cup of tea myself between asking and getting a reply.
Ready to unburden yourself? Click to confess: http://b3ta.com/addfess
January 4, 2026 at 4:00 PM
Ready to unburden yourself? Click to confess: http://b3ta.com/addfess
Was a member of a decent golf course for years. I cancelled my membership 7 years ago when my child was born, however they haven't removed my name from the tee times booking system. I still play there and haven't paid for a round of golf for years.
January 4, 2026 at 3:20 PM
Was a member of a decent golf course for years. I cancelled my membership 7 years ago when my child was born, however they haven't removed my name from the tee times booking system. I still play there and haven't paid for a round of golf for years.
For Christmas entertaining, I froze ice cubes with small berries in them. In a few, I concealed Mentos mints. It was excellent watching people's reactions when the ice melted enough for their Cokes to suddenly erupt for no apparent reason
January 4, 2026 at 2:20 PM
For Christmas entertaining, I froze ice cubes with small berries in them. In a few, I concealed Mentos mints. It was excellent watching people's reactions when the ice melted enough for their Cokes to suddenly erupt for no apparent reason
When I'm feeling particularly down about my ex I have to remind myself that I had to beg him to wash his bum, and that meant WITH SOAP, not just letting the water run through the crack.
January 4, 2026 at 1:20 PM
When I'm feeling particularly down about my ex I have to remind myself that I had to beg him to wash his bum, and that meant WITH SOAP, not just letting the water run through the crack.
I drank a whole bottle of wine during an online driver awareness course. I think they were suspicious of how chatty I was at the end.
January 4, 2026 at 12:20 PM
I drank a whole bottle of wine during an online driver awareness course. I think they were suspicious of how chatty I was at the end.
I hate soggy cake, mum hates jam, sister hates jelly. We compromised by just having a pint of double cream each instead of a trifle. Delicious. Would do again.
January 4, 2026 at 11:20 AM
I hate soggy cake, mum hates jam, sister hates jelly. We compromised by just having a pint of double cream each instead of a trifle. Delicious. Would do again.
One of the perks of having small kids is you're socially allowed to be feral again, running around soft play, doing silly voices, climbing stuff, and everyone just thinks you're a "great parent". Dreading the day they grow up and I have to go back to pretending I'm normal.
January 4, 2026 at 10:20 AM
One of the perks of having small kids is you're socially allowed to be feral again, running around soft play, doing silly voices, climbing stuff, and everyone just thinks you're a "great parent". Dreading the day they grow up and I have to go back to pretending I'm normal.
Don’t miss Fesshole Live! Grab tickets for Leicester, Luton or Leeds. The Sweden Tour stops in Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and Anon Opin hits Leicester too. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
January 4, 2026 at 9:50 AM
Don’t miss Fesshole Live! Grab tickets for Leicester, Luton or Leeds. The Sweden Tour stops in Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and Anon Opin hits Leicester too. https://sites.google.com/view/fesshole
We've had my in-laws over for a few days, and due to one of them having mobility issues, we've got one of those frames that you put round the lav. I'm not saying I'd want it there full time, but man it doesn't half help.
January 4, 2026 at 9:20 AM
We've had my in-laws over for a few days, and due to one of them having mobility issues, we've got one of those frames that you put round the lav. I'm not saying I'd want it there full time, but man it doesn't half help.
Married someone from another country and the best perk is their family thinks I don't understand the language, so I'm always "excused" from the endless in-law debates. I just smile, nod, and enjoy the peace.
January 4, 2026 at 8:20 AM
Married someone from another country and the best perk is their family thinks I don't understand the language, so I'm always "excused" from the endless in-law debates. I just smile, nod, and enjoy the peace.
For five years, we tricked our fussy niece into eating Christmas turkey by calling it "special chicken." The ruse finally collapsed yesterday when she asked for both "chicken" and turkey, forcing us to confess the truth before she worked out they were both the same thing.
January 3, 2026 at 11:20 PM
For five years, we tricked our fussy niece into eating Christmas turkey by calling it "special chicken." The ruse finally collapsed yesterday when she asked for both "chicken" and turkey, forcing us to confess the truth before she worked out they were both the same thing.
I install low-carbon heat pumps for a living. I cannot let go of my coal fire. Am obsessed with the crackle and the flame. It is filthy and polluting but I don't make the rules.
January 3, 2026 at 10:20 PM
I install low-carbon heat pumps for a living. I cannot let go of my coal fire. Am obsessed with the crackle and the flame. It is filthy and polluting but I don't make the rules.
As an Artisanal Baker, I love great bread. I can bore people senseless about the merits of organic or heritage grains. I'm a total bread snob. However, the only bread I eat at Christmas is supermarket thick sliced white loafs. There's nothing better for Turkey sandwiches.
January 3, 2026 at 9:20 PM
As an Artisanal Baker, I love great bread. I can bore people senseless about the merits of organic or heritage grains. I'm a total bread snob. However, the only bread I eat at Christmas is supermarket thick sliced white loafs. There's nothing better for Turkey sandwiches.
I'm admittedly not great at keeping in contact with people. I found out at Christmas dinner with my family that my brother hasn't been talking to me for 2 years. I had no idea.
January 3, 2026 at 8:20 PM
I'm admittedly not great at keeping in contact with people. I found out at Christmas dinner with my family that my brother hasn't been talking to me for 2 years. I had no idea.
I can't be the only one this happens to, but my armpit hair tangles and I only noticed, because it's really painful when they're from opposite ends and I raise my arm. So have to trim them every now and then.
January 3, 2026 at 7:20 PM
I can't be the only one this happens to, but my armpit hair tangles and I only noticed, because it's really painful when they're from opposite ends and I raise my arm. So have to trim them every now and then.
My wife just gave me a hand job while talking about how she's going to organise an upcoming work day. I don't mean she thought her administrative schedule is sexy, just.... as if she was doing two chores at once.
January 3, 2026 at 6:20 PM
My wife just gave me a hand job while talking about how she's going to organise an upcoming work day. I don't mean she thought her administrative schedule is sexy, just.... as if she was doing two chores at once.
My partner wonders why our toddler prefers me, it's simple just sit on the floor while they play and PUT YOUR FUCKING PHONE DOWN
January 3, 2026 at 5:20 PM
My partner wonders why our toddler prefers me, it's simple just sit on the floor while they play and PUT YOUR FUCKING PHONE DOWN
Always been stick thin but added 30kg this year. I retired at the start of Jan but didn't change the way I eat. Eating like a builder when you're sitting down reading romantasy novels all day just means that you don't need to wear a coat when you go outside.
January 3, 2026 at 4:20 PM
Always been stick thin but added 30kg this year. I retired at the start of Jan but didn't change the way I eat. Eating like a builder when you're sitting down reading romantasy novels all day just means that you don't need to wear a coat when you go outside.