The Schlocketeer
@schlocketeer.bsky.social
Celebrating cinema from the grindhouse to the arthouse and all that lies between.
Pinned
The awfulness of this trilogy has made me realize how good I had it with THE STRANGERS: PREY AT NIGHT.
Is it as good as the original? Nope. But it's decent and still way better than this crapola trilogy. Listen to George. Don't waste your time. Go see Send Help or Shelter instead.
Is it as good as the original? Nope. But it's decent and still way better than this crapola trilogy. Listen to George. Don't waste your time. Go see Send Help or Shelter instead.
February 6, 2026 at 3:55 AM
The awfulness of this trilogy has made me realize how good I had it with THE STRANGERS: PREY AT NIGHT.
Is it as good as the original? Nope. But it's decent and still way better than this crapola trilogy. Listen to George. Don't waste your time. Go see Send Help or Shelter instead.
Is it as good as the original? Nope. But it's decent and still way better than this crapola trilogy. Listen to George. Don't waste your time. Go see Send Help or Shelter instead.
Well, I guess that's one way to get me to watch a remake.
Michael Shannon will star as the titular villain in a contemporary take on THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI from AS ABOVE, SO BELOW's John Erick Dowdle.
Michael Shannon To Star In THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI Remake
Michael Shannon will star as the titular villain in a contemporary take on THE CABINET OF DR. CALIGARI from AS ABOVE, SO BELOW's John Erick Dowdle.
dlvr.it
February 6, 2026 at 3:48 AM
Well, I guess that's one way to get me to watch a remake.
My Current Sam Raimi Ranking...
Evil Dead 2
Darkman
Army of Darkness
The Evil Dead
Drag Me to Hell
A Simple Plan
Spider-Man 2
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
The Quick and the Dead
Spider-Man
The Gift
Crimewave
Spider-Man 3
Oz the Great & Powerful
For Love of the Game
Evil Dead 2
Darkman
Army of Darkness
The Evil Dead
Drag Me to Hell
A Simple Plan
Spider-Man 2
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
The Quick and the Dead
Spider-Man
The Gift
Crimewave
Spider-Man 3
Oz the Great & Powerful
For Love of the Game
February 6, 2026 at 3:42 AM
My Current Sam Raimi Ranking...
Evil Dead 2
Darkman
Army of Darkness
The Evil Dead
Drag Me to Hell
A Simple Plan
Spider-Man 2
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
The Quick and the Dead
Spider-Man
The Gift
Crimewave
Spider-Man 3
Oz the Great & Powerful
For Love of the Game
Evil Dead 2
Darkman
Army of Darkness
The Evil Dead
Drag Me to Hell
A Simple Plan
Spider-Man 2
Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness
The Quick and the Dead
Spider-Man
The Gift
Crimewave
Spider-Man 3
Oz the Great & Powerful
For Love of the Game
It'd be nice if at least 1 in every 5 new Dracula movies had Quincy in them.
Bill Campbell needs some company!
Bill Campbell needs some company!
It's honestly surprising Quincy Morris rarely pops up in Dracula adaptations
February 6, 2026 at 3:29 AM
It'd be nice if at least 1 in every 5 new Dracula movies had Quincy in them.
Bill Campbell needs some company!
Bill Campbell needs some company!
Reposted by The Schlocketeer
Amazing that the new Muppet Special has better lighting and cinematography than most movies made in the past 20 years.
February 6, 2026 at 1:35 AM
Amazing that the new Muppet Special has better lighting and cinematography than most movies made in the past 20 years.
Oooooof.
Chico Marx walks into Groucho’s office at Spyglass. “Okay boss, remember when-a you told us to figure out a way to top the bad press? I did it!”
Groucho: “You dummy, I said find a way to STOP the bad press.”
Chico: “Uh oh…”
Groucho: “You dummy, I said find a way to STOP the bad press.”
Chico: “Uh oh…”
February 6, 2026 at 3:18 AM
Oooooof.
Reposted by The Schlocketeer
“Are you a businessman or are you a newsman?”
Ooof, that moment when Mike says he’s with Don and not Lowell. This movie is perfect
Ooof, that moment when Mike says he’s with Don and not Lowell. This movie is perfect
February 6, 2026 at 2:37 AM
“Are you a businessman or are you a newsman?”
Ooof, that moment when Mike says he’s with Don and not Lowell. This movie is perfect
Ooof, that moment when Mike says he’s with Don and not Lowell. This movie is perfect
Reposted by The Schlocketeer
I get my news from a reliable source.
February 5, 2026 at 11:52 PM
I get my news from a reliable source.
Reposted by The Schlocketeer
A U.S. Senator just called Netflix "the woke-est content in the history of the world," which is laughable as all get out. But let's play along and assume it was true: Netflix is by far the most popular streamer in the U.S. and the world. So...Americans must really love "woke"? 🤔
February 3, 2026 at 8:44 PM
A U.S. Senator just called Netflix "the woke-est content in the history of the world," which is laughable as all get out. But let's play along and assume it was true: Netflix is by far the most popular streamer in the U.S. and the world. So...Americans must really love "woke"? 🤔
It's also why the moved the horde of them from Minnesota to Ohio. They're hoping the extreme attention will wear off. And it's already starting to.
ICE hasn't stopped brutalizing people or shredding the Constitution, it's just that corporate media turned the camera as the call for action got too loud and the Democrats stepped in and made sure the issue got changed.
If you sit for a second, you'll recognize that's what happened with BLM, too.
If you sit for a second, you'll recognize that's what happened with BLM, too.
February 3, 2026 at 8:46 PM
It's also why the moved the horde of them from Minnesota to Ohio. They're hoping the extreme attention will wear off. And it's already starting to.
Reposted by The Schlocketeer
The vibes in Trost's new film are absolutely immacualte. You can feel the Castlevania and Resident Evil aesthetics just *radiating* from what he's captured so far.
Truly exciting work coming down the pipeline.
Truly exciting work coming down the pipeline.
I’m excited to finally share some work in progress test footage of my set building for The Castellum of Blood.
I’ve pushed the deadline to March 1st for anyone who still wants to be part of bringing this monstrosity to life.
Link in the comments. www.youtube.com/watch?v=NpgZ...
I’ve pushed the deadline to March 1st for anyone who still wants to be part of bringing this monstrosity to life.
Link in the comments. www.youtube.com/watch?v=NpgZ...
The Castellum of Blood - Test Footage (Pre-Production Demo)
YouTube video by Jason Trost
www.youtube.com
February 3, 2026 at 8:34 PM
The vibes in Trost's new film are absolutely immacualte. You can feel the Castlevania and Resident Evil aesthetics just *radiating* from what he's captured so far.
Truly exciting work coming down the pipeline.
Truly exciting work coming down the pipeline.
Reposted by The Schlocketeer
Three rules in FBI firearm training:
1. Always point your weapon downrange
2. Do not point your weapon at anything you do not intend to shoot
3. Don’t put your finger on the trigger unless you intend to shoot
Guns are not for threatening compliance for unarmed people doing things you don’t like
1. Always point your weapon downrange
2. Do not point your weapon at anything you do not intend to shoot
3. Don’t put your finger on the trigger unless you intend to shoot
Guns are not for threatening compliance for unarmed people doing things you don’t like
happening this morning in Minneapolis -- ICE agents drawing guns on observers. I reiterate again that it is only a matter of time before DHS kills more innocent people in Minnesota. Congress needs to shut this shit down right now.
February 3, 2026 at 4:50 PM
Three rules in FBI firearm training:
1. Always point your weapon downrange
2. Do not point your weapon at anything you do not intend to shoot
3. Don’t put your finger on the trigger unless you intend to shoot
Guns are not for threatening compliance for unarmed people doing things you don’t like
1. Always point your weapon downrange
2. Do not point your weapon at anything you do not intend to shoot
3. Don’t put your finger on the trigger unless you intend to shoot
Guns are not for threatening compliance for unarmed people doing things you don’t like
DRACULA: A LOVE TALE (2025, dir. Luc Besson)
Imagine if someone tossed Coppola's Dracula, Tykwer's Perfume, a small dose of Jordan's Interview with the Vampire, and the humor of Burton's Sleepy Hollow into a very French blender & then dusted the top of the final concoction with a bunch of cocaine.
Imagine if someone tossed Coppola's Dracula, Tykwer's Perfume, a small dose of Jordan's Interview with the Vampire, and the humor of Burton's Sleepy Hollow into a very French blender & then dusted the top of the final concoction with a bunch of cocaine.
February 3, 2026 at 3:52 AM
DRACULA: A LOVE TALE (2025, dir. Luc Besson)
Imagine if someone tossed Coppola's Dracula, Tykwer's Perfume, a small dose of Jordan's Interview with the Vampire, and the humor of Burton's Sleepy Hollow into a very French blender & then dusted the top of the final concoction with a bunch of cocaine.
Imagine if someone tossed Coppola's Dracula, Tykwer's Perfume, a small dose of Jordan's Interview with the Vampire, and the humor of Burton's Sleepy Hollow into a very French blender & then dusted the top of the final concoction with a bunch of cocaine.
The insane amount of support that this campaign has already received goes a long way towards showing how horribly Joel fumbled things with fans in regards to the failed S14 campaign. I'm glad that it looks like the ship has been righted. For a moment there, it looked like MST3K was gone for good.
In the not-too-distant future, RiffTrax is making four new episodes of Mystery Science Theater 3000! Support us on Kickstarter: rifftraxmakesmst3k.com #RiffTraxMakesMST3K @mst3kofficial.bsky.social
February 2, 2026 at 9:30 PM
The insane amount of support that this campaign has already received goes a long way towards showing how horribly Joel fumbled things with fans in regards to the failed S14 campaign. I'm glad that it looks like the ship has been righted. For a moment there, it looked like MST3K was gone for good.
"Standing room only."
Tell me you don't go to movie theaters without telling me you don't go to movie theaters.
Tell me you don't go to movie theaters without telling me you don't go to movie theaters.
Kayleigh: My mom went to see Melania. She said the theater was packed, it was standing room only. People were cheering through it, they were excited. It was interactive—people interplaying with the film. She said it was just electric.
February 2, 2026 at 9:02 PM
"Standing room only."
Tell me you don't go to movie theaters without telling me you don't go to movie theaters.
Tell me you don't go to movie theaters without telling me you don't go to movie theaters.
Yes please.
Paramount Pictures and director Josh Ruben are said to be working on HEART EYES 2, a sequel to last year’s Valentine’s Day slasher.
Is HEART EYES 2 Happening? It Sure Sounds Like It
Paramount Pictures and director Josh Ruben are said to be working on HEART EYES 2, a sequel to last year’s Valentine’s Day slasher.
dlvr.it
January 30, 2026 at 1:37 PM
Yes please.
You could not pay me to live in a community that had an HOA.
January 30, 2026 at 11:35 AM
You could not pay me to live in a community that had an HOA.
"Call Schumer's office!"
Chuck Schumer doesn't care what any of us think. At all. The only way to get through to him is to primary him. That's it. That's the move.
Chuck Schumer doesn't care what any of us think. At all. The only way to get through to him is to primary him. That's it. That's the move.
January 28, 2026 at 10:01 PM
"Call Schumer's office!"
Chuck Schumer doesn't care what any of us think. At all. The only way to get through to him is to primary him. That's it. That's the move.
Chuck Schumer doesn't care what any of us think. At all. The only way to get through to him is to primary him. That's it. That's the move.
I get that some people put in their Letterboxd reviews where they watched a movie (i.e. "Source: AMC+"), but what kind of jackass admits in that form that they pirated a movie? Especially when they are a known critic with their own podcast and website?
January 28, 2026 at 1:08 AM
I get that some people put in their Letterboxd reviews where they watched a movie (i.e. "Source: AMC+"), but what kind of jackass admits in that form that they pirated a movie? Especially when they are a known critic with their own podcast and website?
When your wife asks you to set a timer for 6 minutes...
January 27, 2026 at 12:32 AM
When your wife asks you to set a timer for 6 minutes...
No amount of good reviews will convince me to watch WONDER MAN. Best wishes to those who made it, but the MCU is nearly dead to me now.
Honestly, Marvel is lucky that I even still care about watching DAREDEVIL, SPIDEY 4, and the eventual DOCTOR STRANGE 3.
Honestly, Marvel is lucky that I even still care about watching DAREDEVIL, SPIDEY 4, and the eventual DOCTOR STRANGE 3.
January 24, 2026 at 5:31 AM
No amount of good reviews will convince me to watch WONDER MAN. Best wishes to those who made it, but the MCU is nearly dead to me now.
Honestly, Marvel is lucky that I even still care about watching DAREDEVIL, SPIDEY 4, and the eventual DOCTOR STRANGE 3.
Honestly, Marvel is lucky that I even still care about watching DAREDEVIL, SPIDEY 4, and the eventual DOCTOR STRANGE 3.
Woke up this morning to a new Rob Zombie song that contained a James Bond reference. Felt like an early birthday present.
January 24, 2026 at 5:21 AM
Woke up this morning to a new Rob Zombie song that contained a James Bond reference. Felt like an early birthday present.
Reposted by The Schlocketeer
I have tried to pitch MULTIPLE OUTLETS pieces about how VIEWERS LONG FOR A RETURN TO TRADITIONAL TELEVISION and no one will bite and evidence just keeps piling up and it's very frustrating!!!
Everyone in the industry with half a brain is reading this article and repeatedly smacking their foreheads because YEAH, NO SHIT, THAT’S WHAT WE’VE ALL BEEN TELLING YOU GUYS, FOR YEARS
January 23, 2026 at 10:59 PM
I have tried to pitch MULTIPLE OUTLETS pieces about how VIEWERS LONG FOR A RETURN TO TRADITIONAL TELEVISION and no one will bite and evidence just keeps piling up and it's very frustrating!!!
I.....kinda do?
Look, we've had 7 live action TRANSFORMERS movies and 3 live action G.I. JOE movies in the past 20 years. Let me have this.
Look, we've had 7 live action TRANSFORMERS movies and 3 live action G.I. JOE movies in the past 20 years. Let me have this.
...who the fuck wants a new He-Man movie?
January 21, 2026 at 8:06 PM
I.....kinda do?
Look, we've had 7 live action TRANSFORMERS movies and 3 live action G.I. JOE movies in the past 20 years. Let me have this.
Look, we've had 7 live action TRANSFORMERS movies and 3 live action G.I. JOE movies in the past 20 years. Let me have this.
Everyone's always carrying on about GRRM finally finishing A SONG OF FIRE & ICE.
Meanwhile, I'm over here just wishing he'd write another horror or sci-fi horror novel.
I don't give a shit about GOT.
Give me something else like SANDKINGS, NIGHTFLYERS, THE ARMAGEDDON RAG, or FEVRE DREAM again.
Meanwhile, I'm over here just wishing he'd write another horror or sci-fi horror novel.
I don't give a shit about GOT.
Give me something else like SANDKINGS, NIGHTFLYERS, THE ARMAGEDDON RAG, or FEVRE DREAM again.
January 21, 2026 at 7:55 PM
Everyone's always carrying on about GRRM finally finishing A SONG OF FIRE & ICE.
Meanwhile, I'm over here just wishing he'd write another horror or sci-fi horror novel.
I don't give a shit about GOT.
Give me something else like SANDKINGS, NIGHTFLYERS, THE ARMAGEDDON RAG, or FEVRE DREAM again.
Meanwhile, I'm over here just wishing he'd write another horror or sci-fi horror novel.
I don't give a shit about GOT.
Give me something else like SANDKINGS, NIGHTFLYERS, THE ARMAGEDDON RAG, or FEVRE DREAM again.