Ruggle Billions
@ruggleb.bsky.social
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
Charisma is one of the only things a celebrity is allowed to ooze
June 25, 2025 at 6:32 AM
Charisma is one of the only things a celebrity is allowed to ooze
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
cat doing improv: alright, so im going to puke. now someone give me a location
audience: floor!
cat: i think i heard “couch or bed?”
audience: floor!
cat: i think i heard “couch or bed?”
June 7, 2025 at 8:42 PM
cat doing improv: alright, so im going to puke. now someone give me a location
audience: floor!
cat: i think i heard “couch or bed?”
audience: floor!
cat: i think i heard “couch or bed?”
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
Satire requires a clarity of purpose and target and also basically a goddamn flashing disclaimer, lest it be mistaken for genuine sentiment by the most joyless dunderheads on the internet.
May 22, 2025 at 11:58 AM
Satire requires a clarity of purpose and target and also basically a goddamn flashing disclaimer, lest it be mistaken for genuine sentiment by the most joyless dunderheads on the internet.
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
the theme for the TV show Rawhide has the couplet
"dont try to understand em/
just rope and throw and brand em"
where "em" refers to cows, and im just imagining a frustrated cowboy being like, i just dont understand these cows!!! baby, they're cows!!!
"dont try to understand em/
just rope and throw and brand em"
where "em" refers to cows, and im just imagining a frustrated cowboy being like, i just dont understand these cows!!! baby, they're cows!!!
April 14, 2025 at 2:41 AM
the theme for the TV show Rawhide has the couplet
"dont try to understand em/
just rope and throw and brand em"
where "em" refers to cows, and im just imagining a frustrated cowboy being like, i just dont understand these cows!!! baby, they're cows!!!
"dont try to understand em/
just rope and throw and brand em"
where "em" refers to cows, and im just imagining a frustrated cowboy being like, i just dont understand these cows!!! baby, they're cows!!!
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
It’s one supply chain, Michael. How long could it take to recreate? 2-3 months?
April 5, 2025 at 3:02 AM
It’s one supply chain, Michael. How long could it take to recreate? 2-3 months?
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
getting hit by a bus because i think it's a big fuzzy cat with fucked up hands
March 30, 2025 at 7:47 PM
getting hit by a bus because i think it's a big fuzzy cat with fucked up hands
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
i dont think i could write something as good and funny as “Misbehavin’” if i had 100 years. which is frankly not a problem because i dont have to. all i have to do is write Poop Wax on a thermos and take a swig out of it everytime a viewer tips me $9. this is actually more sustainable
March 10, 2025 at 5:53 AM
i dont think i could write something as good and funny as “Misbehavin’” if i had 100 years. which is frankly not a problem because i dont have to. all i have to do is write Poop Wax on a thermos and take a swig out of it everytime a viewer tips me $9. this is actually more sustainable
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
You guys! You’re not gonna believe this! It’s Baragon!
February 26, 2025 at 12:35 AM
You guys! You’re not gonna believe this! It’s Baragon!
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
do u guys think clowns’ noses light up when they use a bidet
February 19, 2025 at 12:55 AM
do u guys think clowns’ noses light up when they use a bidet
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
This probably isn’t the developers’ top priority (although it should be), but I’d love to see the Bluesky app have an option to switch to the Julian calendar for those of us who reject the lies of Pope Gregory XIII
February 9, 2025 at 12:31 AM
This probably isn’t the developers’ top priority (although it should be), but I’d love to see the Bluesky app have an option to switch to the Julian calendar for those of us who reject the lies of Pope Gregory XIII
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
[pennywise the clown listening to a tribe called quest]
can they kick WHAT
can they kick WHAT
February 8, 2025 at 4:10 AM
[pennywise the clown listening to a tribe called quest]
can they kick WHAT
can they kick WHAT
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
probably the last human born with elbows was just conceived. food for thought even if it doesn't play out
February 3, 2025 at 4:54 AM
probably the last human born with elbows was just conceived. food for thought even if it doesn't play out
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
it pains me to have to admit this to everyone, but when a lightbulb appears above my head, it’s not because i have a bright idea; i am just thinking about a lightbulb
January 25, 2025 at 11:02 AM
it pains me to have to admit this to everyone, but when a lightbulb appears above my head, it’s not because i have a bright idea; i am just thinking about a lightbulb
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
(asked to explain the gap on my resume) haha.. nah, no way man. you wouldn't get it. point is i'm here now
January 10, 2025 at 5:21 AM
(asked to explain the gap on my resume) haha.. nah, no way man. you wouldn't get it. point is i'm here now
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
elon you woke ass sumbitch piece of sheit me & the boys challange you to a good old fashioned niagara falls barrel race— lets get fuckin wet
January 2, 2025 at 1:52 AM
elon you woke ass sumbitch piece of sheit me & the boys challange you to a good old fashioned niagara falls barrel race— lets get fuckin wet
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
everybody knows about kissing under the mistletoe, but standing under certain other plants can make you do stuff too
December 22, 2024 at 4:42 AM
everybody knows about kissing under the mistletoe, but standing under certain other plants can make you do stuff too
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
forgot about the sunglasses on my head until they fell perfectly into place while saying "diahrrea medication" to the pharmacist
December 19, 2024 at 7:27 PM
forgot about the sunglasses on my head until they fell perfectly into place while saying "diahrrea medication" to the pharmacist
Reposted by Ruggle Billions
It would have been so crazy if JFK dodged the bullet at the last moment thus activating Witch Time and allowing for a powerful combo counterattack. But unfortunately that was not possible back then
December 17, 2024 at 6:58 AM
It would have been so crazy if JFK dodged the bullet at the last moment thus activating Witch Time and allowing for a powerful combo counterattack. But unfortunately that was not possible back then
Here I am, googling “luigi manifesto” like I’m 13 again and fighting yoshi fanboys online.
December 12, 2024 at 3:28 AM
Here I am, googling “luigi manifesto” like I’m 13 again and fighting yoshi fanboys online.
Stardew Valley let’s me pursue the fantasy of drifting away from my beautiful wife & kids as I obsessively visit a parrot island in search of golden walnuts.
December 11, 2024 at 9:32 PM
Stardew Valley let’s me pursue the fantasy of drifting away from my beautiful wife & kids as I obsessively visit a parrot island in search of golden walnuts.