⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
@richardproctor.bsky.social
That hot hunk of man meat all the mums lust after. I’m not him. I’m his fat, nerdy, weird friend. Starting my life over again.
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:knajrxe53yte4jzzqvuu4p2q/feed/aaaa3ra62j7ga
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:knajrxe53yte4jzzqvuu4p2q/feed/aaaa3ra62j7ga
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⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
@richardproctor.bsky.social
· Mar 30
I just missed World Backup Day.
Does that mean I have to wait until next year to backup my laptop?
Does that mean I have to wait until next year to backup my laptop?
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
What does it mean if the holy water sizzles when it touches your skin?
April 17, 2025 at 1:16 PM
What does it mean if the holy water sizzles when it touches your skin?
I just missed World Backup Day.
Does that mean I have to wait until next year to backup my laptop?
Does that mean I have to wait until next year to backup my laptop?
March 30, 2025 at 1:58 PM
I just missed World Backup Day.
Does that mean I have to wait until next year to backup my laptop?
Does that mean I have to wait until next year to backup my laptop?
I just chipped my tooth.
Now my tongue will be investigating that for the next three weeks...
Now my tongue will be investigating that for the next three weeks...
February 14, 2025 at 10:30 PM
I just chipped my tooth.
Now my tongue will be investigating that for the next three weeks...
Now my tongue will be investigating that for the next three weeks...
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
When you woke up and our eyes met, that scream was everything.
January 29, 2025 at 10:12 PM
When you woke up and our eyes met, that scream was everything.
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
First date idea:
I'm wearing nothing but a red flag so he can't say he wasn't warned.
I'm wearing nothing but a red flag so he can't say he wasn't warned.
January 29, 2025 at 10:08 PM
First date idea:
I'm wearing nothing but a red flag so he can't say he wasn't warned.
I'm wearing nothing but a red flag so he can't say he wasn't warned.
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
we’re going to run the country like a business! *fires HR, hires a bunch of unqualified executives, fires all the workers*
January 29, 2025 at 6:20 PM
we’re going to run the country like a business! *fires HR, hires a bunch of unqualified executives, fires all the workers*
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
There comes a time in everyone's life when you start referring to anyone under 30 as a "kid."
January 29, 2025 at 6:24 PM
There comes a time in everyone's life when you start referring to anyone under 30 as a "kid."
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
First date idea: lemme watch you bite your bottom lip
January 23, 2025 at 3:41 PM
First date idea: lemme watch you bite your bottom lip
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
I haven’t rue’d the day in quite a while. Might give it a go tomorrow.
January 29, 2025 at 6:27 PM
I haven’t rue’d the day in quite a while. Might give it a go tomorrow.
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
I just canceled my subscription to life
January 29, 2025 at 6:41 PM
I just canceled my subscription to life
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
Remember when satire was distinguishable from reality? Me either
January 29, 2025 at 6:42 PM
Remember when satire was distinguishable from reality? Me either
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
Capri Sun packages were designed to teach kids how to do emergency tracheotomies
January 29, 2025 at 6:43 PM
Capri Sun packages were designed to teach kids how to do emergency tracheotomies
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
[inventing camels] give them vagina feet
January 29, 2025 at 8:15 PM
[inventing camels] give them vagina feet
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
I'm taking up recreational screaming
January 29, 2025 at 8:24 PM
I'm taking up recreational screaming
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
I was talking to a guy from Belgium who spoke 4 different languages fluently, which is amazing to me because I live in a country where we basically only speak 1 language and still manage to fuck it up regularly
January 29, 2025 at 8:38 PM
I was talking to a guy from Belgium who spoke 4 different languages fluently, which is amazing to me because I live in a country where we basically only speak 1 language and still manage to fuck it up regularly
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
I have forgotten how to be anything other than distrustful.
January 29, 2025 at 8:47 PM
I have forgotten how to be anything other than distrustful.
This is what Twitter/X/Grok thinks of me. It’s scarily accurate 😳
January 29, 2025 at 11:32 PM
This is what Twitter/X/Grok thinks of me. It’s scarily accurate 😳
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
My wife told me the one thing she really wants for Christmas and I hope she gets it because I’d really like to meet Jason Momoa.
December 9, 2024 at 1:57 PM
My wife told me the one thing she really wants for Christmas and I hope she gets it because I’d really like to meet Jason Momoa.
When your mum said you could be anything, why did you choose to be a cunt?
December 8, 2024 at 9:37 PM
When your mum said you could be anything, why did you choose to be a cunt?
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
The person you are trying to reach is emotionally unavailable. Please try again later
December 7, 2024 at 8:10 PM
The person you are trying to reach is emotionally unavailable. Please try again later
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
i like my coffee like i like my men; sliding off the roof of my car as i absent-mindedly drive away.
December 7, 2024 at 2:06 PM
i like my coffee like i like my men; sliding off the roof of my car as i absent-mindedly drive away.
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
date: can you take off your work gloves
Jim Henson: they have names
Jim Henson: they have names
May 1, 2023 at 12:01 PM
date: can you take off your work gloves
Jim Henson: they have names
Jim Henson: they have names
Reposted by ⫷🅴🆅🅴🆁🆈🅾🅽🅴⫸ 🇬🇧
My GPS keeps raising her voice at me.
December 5, 2024 at 4:38 PM
My GPS keeps raising her voice at me.