Melissa Nelson
melnel35.bsky.social
Melissa Nelson
@melnel35.bsky.social
A realist with deep-seeded optimistic tendencies with far too many interests and random knowledge.
Reposted by Melissa Nelson
The White House has been caught.

The administration inserted a photo of Bill Clinton, Michael Jackson, and Diana Ross into the Epstein files and falsely implied it showed them with victims.

In reality, it’s a publicly available fundraiser photo featuring Jackson and Ross’s own children.
December 20, 2025 at 12:33 PM
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Terrifying headline if you don’t realize they are sports teams.
December 19, 2025 at 4:37 PM
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Become ungovernable
December 17, 2025 at 1:16 AM
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This entire weekend
December 15, 2025 at 3:58 AM
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When I was in high school we made 69 jokes but the economy is so bad kids these days can only joke about 67
December 12, 2025 at 11:29 PM
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Social media was a mistake and now we're stuck with a dumbass president and every person who uses it suffering from some type of mental health condition.
December 11, 2025 at 3:21 AM
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Crypto Leaders Call For Infusion Of 20 Million Dopes To Stabilize Market
Crypto Leaders Call For Infusion Of 20 Million Dopes To Stabilize Market
BOSTON—Stressing that the move would help keep digital currencies liquid through the coming year, crypto leaders called for an infusion of 20 million dopes Thursday to stabilize the market. “We’re cal...
theonion.com
December 1, 2025 at 9:00 PM
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November 28, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Couldn't sleep last night, so I threw on a Star Wars movie to stop overthinking. My #StarWars list based on enjoyment:
1)Empire
2)New Hope & Return of the Jedi
3)Force Awakens
4)Last Jedi
5)Rise of Skywalker
6)Phantom Menace
7)Attack of the Clones
8)Revenge of the Sith
9)Rogue One
10)Solo
November 25, 2025 at 12:27 PM
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Mitochondria being the powerhouse of the cell is cool and all but I think classes like "How to calm the fuck down as an adult in a healthy non self-destructive way 101" is something that should also be taught before graduation
November 20, 2025 at 11:08 PM
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The really fun part, every time the president says something utterly psychotic, is that right after all his little toadies and goblins go on camera to say that he didn't mean what he said and that you're stupid for thinking so, his next move is always to announce that he meant every word of it
November 21, 2025 at 12:53 AM
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Bring it‼️
November 16, 2025 at 2:32 AM
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"That is why I will sign the discharge petition right now to release the Epstein files" -- Rep. Grijalva
November 12, 2025 at 9:24 PM
#Packers Rant:
1) Why do we even have McManus?
2) Why is our offensive scheme to play scared of TD's?
3) Why is LaFleur is McCarthy 2.0?
4) Why do we suck so much?
November 11, 2025 at 3:42 AM
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And I'll say it again:

‪If we had believed children and women, none of this would be happening.

He'd be in jail, and she'd be President.
November 9, 2025 at 2:39 PM
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The most corrupt administration in American history.
November 7, 2025 at 12:46 AM
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I knew we were going to be okay when a new Mummy movie with Fraser and Weisz was announced
November 5, 2025 at 3:10 AM
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November 4, 2025 at 7:17 PM
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This interview MADE MY DAY.
November 4, 2025 at 3:56 PM
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Well, if a lunatic tweeted it, then it must be true!
November 4, 2025 at 6:26 AM
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Mike Johnson: ‘My Christian Faith Is More About Not Jacking Off Than Feeding The Poor’
November 3, 2025 at 10:30 PM
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“Permanent Standard Time (not springing ahead in March) could prevent 300,000 cases of stroke per year and lower nationwide prevalence of obesity by 2.6 million.” #DitchDST
November 2, 2025 at 6:56 PM
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i should be able to click a button at the beginning of a sports season that says “i’m normal” and i don’t get served any ads for crypto or gambling
October 26, 2025 at 10:50 PM
Reposted by Melissa Nelson
Fun fact, if Jason Segel ever made the Dracula Musical irl, it would take us all back to the correct timeline and fix everything 🧛

Do the right thing Jason #draculamusical
October 9, 2025 at 4:06 PM
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Shit is so bad that the best American news of the week is that Dolly Parton didn't die.
October 10, 2025 at 2:51 AM