Max E Nurse
@maxenurse.bsky.social
Irreverent Brit nurse practitioner, chronic dad humour... "It shouldn't happen in health care" @ maxenurse.wordpress.com . Married, kids, relatively sane from the outside!
Nobody pays me any attention... bsky.app/profile/maxenurse.bsky.social
8/1/25
Nobody pays me any attention... bsky.app/profile/maxenurse.bsky.social
8/1/25
Pinned
Max E Nurse
@maxenurse.bsky.social
· Mar 7
Patient wanted me to check his testicles... They are now looking like The Times crossword, which is a coincidence as he had a cross word with me when I put the Sharpies away. Still at least you can't see his rash anymore.
Reposted by Max E Nurse
how else will i know if my kid's a witch?
November 26, 2025 at 7:28 PM
how else will i know if my kid's a witch?
The 111 call handlers have proved again how knowledgeable they are regarding medical terms...
November 27, 2025 at 8:28 AM
The 111 call handlers have proved again how knowledgeable they are regarding medical terms...
A kick in the nuts works just as well, without any toxins ... I can offer this without prescription.
November 24, 2025 at 1:06 PM
A kick in the nuts works just as well, without any toxins ... I can offer this without prescription.
Reposted by Max E Nurse
To the people who suffer in silence-
Thank you!!!
Thank you!!!
November 3, 2025 at 1:40 PM
To the people who suffer in silence-
Thank you!!!
Thank you!!!
Ironically I didn't think they'll want to play my favourite song at my funeral...
a black and white photo of a band with the words " i 'm still alive "
ALT: a black and white photo of a band with the words " i 'm still alive "
media.tenor.com
October 29, 2025 at 12:05 PM
Ironically I didn't think they'll want to play my favourite song at my funeral...
Rest in Peace Sybil.
a woman wearing a pink headband is talking on a cell phone
ALT: a woman wearing a pink headband is talking on a cell phone
media.tenor.com
October 28, 2025 at 1:04 PM
Rest in Peace Sybil.
Reposted by Max E Nurse
Hard to know when someone is hitchhiking or just like really supportive
October 28, 2025 at 1:10 AM
Hard to know when someone is hitchhiking or just like really supportive
Should constipation simply be referred to as back logged?
October 28, 2025 at 12:11 PM
Should constipation simply be referred to as back logged?
The post-pilates fart is the best fart of the week.
There's only so much clenching I can do!!
There's only so much clenching I can do!!
October 22, 2025 at 6:18 PM
The post-pilates fart is the best fart of the week.
There's only so much clenching I can do!!
There's only so much clenching I can do!!
Reposted by Max E Nurse
Nostalgia's okay, but it used to be better
October 21, 2025 at 3:35 PM
Nostalgia's okay, but it used to be better
Stop scrolling and post two characters who bring you happiness.
October 21, 2025 at 7:52 PM
Stop scrolling and post two characters who bring you happiness.
Reposted by Max E Nurse
I haven't made one of these in a few years
October 20, 2025 at 12:55 AM
I haven't made one of these in a few years
Reposted by Max E Nurse
"A closely tracked package never arrives."
- proverb
- proverb
October 20, 2025 at 4:31 PM
"A closely tracked package never arrives."
- proverb
- proverb
I don't know who this women is... But I think she has the same ability to do pilates as me.
Letitia James Sounds Like Us,
Because She IS One Of Us. We
Stand With Her Against Chump's
Fake Persecution Prosecution......
Because She IS One Of Us. We
Stand With Her Against Chump's
Fake Persecution Prosecution......
October 20, 2025 at 3:03 PM
I don't know who this women is... But I think she has the same ability to do pilates as me.
But is it:
A: A pub where warm canines go
B: A warmed pub for dogs
C: A command you give to a warm canine when you want it to sound like a sheep.
D: like a snickers bar, but rather than peanuts it's got Frankfurters and bread in it.
...
... Or have I missed the point again?
A: A pub where warm canines go
B: A warmed pub for dogs
C: A command you give to a warm canine when you want it to sound like a sheep.
D: like a snickers bar, but rather than peanuts it's got Frankfurters and bread in it.
...
... Or have I missed the point again?
October 20, 2025 at 2:57 PM
But is it:
A: A pub where warm canines go
B: A warmed pub for dogs
C: A command you give to a warm canine when you want it to sound like a sheep.
D: like a snickers bar, but rather than peanuts it's got Frankfurters and bread in it.
...
... Or have I missed the point again?
A: A pub where warm canines go
B: A warmed pub for dogs
C: A command you give to a warm canine when you want it to sound like a sheep.
D: like a snickers bar, but rather than peanuts it's got Frankfurters and bread in it.
...
... Or have I missed the point again?
I wonder if she sings Alanis Morisette songs, after all it's fairly ironic being a singing unsung hero!
www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
Birmingham nurse wins unsung hero award for singing to children
Sally Spencer is recognised for her work with children at Birmingham Children's Hospital.
www.bbc.co.uk
October 20, 2025 at 2:11 PM
I wonder if she sings Alanis Morisette songs, after all it's fairly ironic being a singing unsung hero!
www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...
Brings a whole no meaning to getting a stiffy
there was a time when drinking your beloved's ashes mixed with red wine was all that was available
could this technically still be considered donating your body to science
October 20, 2025 at 11:31 AM
Brings a whole no meaning to getting a stiffy
Alternative Medical Dictionary: maxenurse.wordpress.com/alternative-...
Always looking for contributions... Just added Anal-gesia and Country...
Always looking for contributions... Just added Anal-gesia and Country...
Alternative Medical Dictionary:
Definitions of words and origins of sayings have always fascinated me. So I think it’s time we compiled an ever growing medical dictionary. As promised I’ve created a page for this so i…
maxenurse.wordpress.com
October 17, 2025 at 11:33 AM
Alternative Medical Dictionary: maxenurse.wordpress.com/alternative-...
Always looking for contributions... Just added Anal-gesia and Country...
Always looking for contributions... Just added Anal-gesia and Country...
Reposted by Max E Nurse
An aroused castrato is so rare it might be mythical.
A eunuch horn is like a unicorn.
A eunuch horn is like a unicorn.
October 17, 2025 at 7:12 AM
An aroused castrato is so rare it might be mythical.
A eunuch horn is like a unicorn.
A eunuch horn is like a unicorn.
You could join my patronising club, if you know what that big word means.
I've started a sarcasm club.
It would mean the world to me if you joined.
It would mean the world to me if you joined.
October 17, 2025 at 10:51 AM
You could join my patronising club, if you know what that big word means.
Who's that tennis player that's full of bull??
Is it Alex de Minotaur?
Is it Alex de Minotaur?
October 16, 2025 at 3:59 PM
Who's that tennis player that's full of bull??
Is it Alex de Minotaur?
Is it Alex de Minotaur?
Who's that tennis player you can't escape from?
Is it Carlos Alcatraz?
Is it Carlos Alcatraz?
October 16, 2025 at 3:58 PM
Who's that tennis player you can't escape from?
Is it Carlos Alcatraz?
Is it Carlos Alcatraz?
Who's that tennis player with all the waterproof coats in a row?
Is it John MacsEnarow?
Is it John MacsEnarow?
October 16, 2025 at 3:56 PM
Who's that tennis player with all the waterproof coats in a row?
Is it John MacsEnarow?
Is it John MacsEnarow?
Who's that tennis player standing the the corner of the kitchen?
Is it Ana Kournicupboard?
Is it Ana Kournicupboard?
October 16, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Who's that tennis player standing the the corner of the kitchen?
Is it Ana Kournicupboard?
Is it Ana Kournicupboard?
Nirvana kournikova
ZZ Topher Grace.
October 16, 2025 at 2:01 PM
Nirvana kournikova