DocAtCDI
@docatcdi.com
Sharing smiles
free to steal!
Patreon: free longer content
https://www.threads.net/@docatcdi
https://mastodon.social/@DocAtCDI
https://twitter.com/DocAtCDI
https://www.facebook.com/DocCyber
PG in the daylight discretion after dark
free to steal!
Patreon: free longer content
https://www.threads.net/@docatcdi
https://mastodon.social/@DocAtCDI
https://twitter.com/DocAtCDI
https://www.facebook.com/DocCyber
PG in the daylight discretion after dark
Pinned
DocAtCDI
@docatcdi.com
· 12h
What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he was chosen to act in a biopic on 18th century musical composers? I'll be Bach.
December 26, 2025 at 5:31 PM
What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say when he was chosen to act in a biopic on 18th century musical composers? I'll be Bach.
Why did the whale cross the ocean? To get to the other tide.
December 26, 2025 at 4:31 PM
Why did the whale cross the ocean? To get to the other tide.
You know, people say they pick their nose. But I feel like I was just born with mine.
December 26, 2025 at 3:31 PM
You know, people say they pick their nose. But I feel like I was just born with mine.
Never trust a tree in the summer...
Most of them seem pretty shady.
Most of them seem pretty shady.
December 26, 2025 at 2:31 PM
Never trust a tree in the summer...
Most of them seem pretty shady.
Most of them seem pretty shady.
What do you call potheads from Pennsylvania?
Keystoners.
Keystoners.
December 26, 2025 at 1:31 PM
What do you call potheads from Pennsylvania?
Keystoners.
Keystoners.
Reposted by DocAtCDI
Legends from a serene mountaintop tell of a thoughtful whale that daydreamed alongside an excitable puppy.
December 26, 2025 at 1:04 PM
Legends from a serene mountaintop tell of a thoughtful whale that daydreamed alongside an excitable puppy.
And the award for best neckwear goes to...
Well, would you look at that! It's a tie!
Well, would you look at that! It's a tie!
December 26, 2025 at 12:31 PM
And the award for best neckwear goes to...
Well, would you look at that! It's a tie!
Well, would you look at that! It's a tie!
On my tombstone, please write:
Not appreciating my puns when I was alive was a grave mistake.
Not appreciating my puns when I was alive was a grave mistake.
December 26, 2025 at 11:31 AM
On my tombstone, please write:
Not appreciating my puns when I was alive was a grave mistake.
Not appreciating my puns when I was alive was a grave mistake.
People make such a big deal about vegans, but I don't get it. I've never had beef with one.
December 26, 2025 at 10:31 AM
People make such a big deal about vegans, but I don't get it. I've never had beef with one.
They finally invented a golf ball that uses a GPS signal to locate the hole, and then roll in.
Just don't put it in your back pocket; you'll have a hard time finding yourself!
Just don't put it in your back pocket; you'll have a hard time finding yourself!
December 26, 2025 at 9:31 AM
They finally invented a golf ball that uses a GPS signal to locate the hole, and then roll in.
Just don't put it in your back pocket; you'll have a hard time finding yourself!
Just don't put it in your back pocket; you'll have a hard time finding yourself!
Light travels faster than sound.
This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
December 26, 2025 at 8:31 AM
Light travels faster than sound.
This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
If you had to live in a different state, what would it be?
I'd live in a state of constant vacation.
I'd live in a state of constant vacation.
December 26, 2025 at 7:31 AM
If you had to live in a different state, what would it be?
I'd live in a state of constant vacation.
I'd live in a state of constant vacation.
I asked my wife to rate my listening skills.
Really don't understand why she told me to urinate on a skeleton.
Really don't understand why she told me to urinate on a skeleton.
December 26, 2025 at 6:31 AM
I asked my wife to rate my listening skills.
Really don't understand why she told me to urinate on a skeleton.
Really don't understand why she told me to urinate on a skeleton.
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself… This takes me back.
December 26, 2025 at 5:31 AM
As I put my car in reverse, I thought to myself… This takes me back.
December 26, 2025 at 5:01 AM
Elon Musk and Bill Gates should team up to invent a cure for erectile dysfunction and name it ElonGates.
December 26, 2025 at 4:31 AM
Elon Musk and Bill Gates should team up to invent a cure for erectile dysfunction and name it ElonGates.
My wife said if I don't do page 7 of the Kama Sutra, she will leave me.
It put me in a very difficult position.
It put me in a very difficult position.
December 26, 2025 at 3:31 AM
My wife said if I don't do page 7 of the Kama Sutra, she will leave me.
It put me in a very difficult position.
It put me in a very difficult position.
December 26, 2025 at 3:04 AM
Would you rather win an Olympic medal, an Academy Award, or the Nobel Peace Prize?
Personally, I'd go for the Nobel Peace Prize. It comes with a lot fewer commercial breaks.
Personally, I'd go for the Nobel Peace Prize. It comes with a lot fewer commercial breaks.
December 26, 2025 at 2:31 AM
Would you rather win an Olympic medal, an Academy Award, or the Nobel Peace Prize?
Personally, I'd go for the Nobel Peace Prize. It comes with a lot fewer commercial breaks.
Personally, I'd go for the Nobel Peace Prize. It comes with a lot fewer commercial breaks.
I've just accidentally sent a naked photo of myself to everyone in my address book!
Not only is it embarrassing, it's cost me a fortune in stamps!
Not only is it embarrassing, it's cost me a fortune in stamps!
December 26, 2025 at 1:31 AM
I've just accidentally sent a naked photo of myself to everyone in my address book!
Not only is it embarrassing, it's cost me a fortune in stamps!
Not only is it embarrassing, it's cost me a fortune in stamps!
I saw a pillow sale.
I bought one,
but someone else got the rest...
I bought one,
but someone else got the rest...
December 26, 2025 at 12:31 AM
I saw a pillow sale.
I bought one,
but someone else got the rest...
I bought one,
but someone else got the rest...
Why did Mozart kill all of his chickens? When he asked them who the best composer was, they all replied, 'Bach, Bach, Bach.'
December 25, 2025 at 11:31 PM
Why did Mozart kill all of his chickens? When he asked them who the best composer was, they all replied, 'Bach, Bach, Bach.'
A quarter-acre of undeveloped land may not seem like much to some people, but to me, it's a lot.
December 25, 2025 at 10:31 PM
A quarter-acre of undeveloped land may not seem like much to some people, but to me, it's a lot.
I bought a new pair of gloves today, but they’re both lefts.
Which, on one hand, is great, but on the other, it’s just not right.
Which, on one hand, is great, but on the other, it’s just not right.
December 25, 2025 at 9:31 PM
I bought a new pair of gloves today, but they’re both lefts.
Which, on one hand, is great, but on the other, it’s just not right.
Which, on one hand, is great, but on the other, it’s just not right.
Relativity theory:
One hair in the soup is relatively too much.
One hair on the head is relatively too little.
One hair in the soup is relatively too much.
One hair on the head is relatively too little.
December 25, 2025 at 8:31 PM
Relativity theory:
One hair in the soup is relatively too much.
One hair on the head is relatively too little.
One hair in the soup is relatively too much.
One hair on the head is relatively too little.