Matt Morain
@mattmorain.bsky.social
Amateur woodworker. Professional wordworker. I like my coffee black, my dogs scruffy, and my commas Oxford. The world's preeminent scholar on what is, and what is not, The Fast and the Furious.
Reposted by Matt Morain
this is your mission. our pedophile president needs you to jump out of a helicopter to kidnap a head of state and his wife so some oil ceos can make a lot of money. we’ll be watching from a resort in florida that still serves wedge salad and checking how many retweets we get. good luck soldier
January 3, 2026 at 10:57 PM
this is your mission. our pedophile president needs you to jump out of a helicopter to kidnap a head of state and his wife so some oil ceos can make a lot of money. we’ll be watching from a resort in florida that still serves wedge salad and checking how many retweets we get. good luck soldier
Too many people have too few people all because a handful of people hoarded nearly everything.
January 2, 2026 at 3:06 AM
Too many people have too few people all because a handful of people hoarded nearly everything.
Reposted by Matt Morain
back in college, I found this blog post with a giant playlist of female fronted punk from around the world and it changed my life.
if you're looking for something different to listen to in the new year, this is it
kangnave.blogspot.com/2013/05/a-re...
if you're looking for something different to listen to in the new year, this is it
kangnave.blogspot.com/2013/05/a-re...
A Reference Of Female-Fronted Punk Rock: 1977-89 (Part 1/3)
When I revamped this blog a while ago, all old posts were deleted, including the very popular A Reference Of Female-Fronted Punk Rock: 19...
kangnave.blogspot.com
December 30, 2025 at 6:47 AM
back in college, I found this blog post with a giant playlist of female fronted punk from around the world and it changed my life.
if you're looking for something different to listen to in the new year, this is it
kangnave.blogspot.com/2013/05/a-re...
if you're looking for something different to listen to in the new year, this is it
kangnave.blogspot.com/2013/05/a-re...
Reposted by Matt Morain
In response to @mattmorain.bsky.social’s text about Michael Crichton, I just sent him this response (and, yes, I’m proud to be this fucking nerdy)
December 29, 2025 at 2:41 AM
In response to @mattmorain.bsky.social’s text about Michael Crichton, I just sent him this response (and, yes, I’m proud to be this fucking nerdy)
Reposted by Matt Morain
For your holiday ambiance, I've made a hypnotic yule log fireplace with ultra slow motion macro footage of flames stretching & warping like liquid as fire reacts with calcium chloride & barium. This is real fire I filmed, not CGI or AI.
10hrs, 4K, crackling sounds, no music, no ads. Happy holidays!
10hrs, 4K, crackling sounds, no music, no ads. Happy holidays!
10 Hours Hypnotic Fireplace Ambiance – 4K Macro Slow-Motion Color Flames, Crackling Fire (No Music)
YouTube video by Rob Sheridan
youtu.be
December 23, 2025 at 8:46 PM
For your holiday ambiance, I've made a hypnotic yule log fireplace with ultra slow motion macro footage of flames stretching & warping like liquid as fire reacts with calcium chloride & barium. This is real fire I filmed, not CGI or AI.
10hrs, 4K, crackling sounds, no music, no ads. Happy holidays!
10hrs, 4K, crackling sounds, no music, no ads. Happy holidays!
Reposted by Matt Morain
being a rich tech guy in the 90s must have been so sick. every morning you start a web page that sells ring tones, sell it at lunch for 2 million dollars, get dinner at a “sushi” restaurant and go to a night club wearing a cologne called Apartheid Sapphire
December 27, 2025 at 2:36 AM
being a rich tech guy in the 90s must have been so sick. every morning you start a web page that sells ring tones, sell it at lunch for 2 million dollars, get dinner at a “sushi” restaurant and go to a night club wearing a cologne called Apartheid Sapphire
@caseystegman.com is it ever explained why Indy has a whip? (I’m watching Raiders)
December 27, 2025 at 1:49 AM
@caseystegman.com is it ever explained why Indy has a whip? (I’m watching Raiders)
It's a little known fact, but Ivan Drago agreed to fight Apollo Creed not because of national pride but because the former was a lifelong fan of Alexander Dumas and bitterly resented Creed's self-appointed nickname, "The Count of Monte Fisto."
December 25, 2025 at 6:38 PM
It's a little known fact, but Ivan Drago agreed to fight Apollo Creed not because of national pride but because the former was a lifelong fan of Alexander Dumas and bitterly resented Creed's self-appointed nickname, "The Count of Monte Fisto."
Reposted by Matt Morain
Second anniversary of our Apple TV’s spectacular attempt to understand me asking for “Hercule Poirot’s Christmas”
December 23, 2025 at 7:25 PM
Second anniversary of our Apple TV’s spectacular attempt to understand me asking for “Hercule Poirot’s Christmas”
Reposted by Matt Morain
from the "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" article
December 24, 2025 at 1:17 PM
from the "Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer" article
Santa doesn’t “work just one day a year.” Don’t be silly.
He’s very busy, especially in the summer, renting his sleigh out to billionaires to hunt caribou from the air over ANWR.
He’s very busy, especially in the summer, renting his sleigh out to billionaires to hunt caribou from the air over ANWR.
December 23, 2025 at 8:22 PM
Santa doesn’t “work just one day a year.” Don’t be silly.
He’s very busy, especially in the summer, renting his sleigh out to billionaires to hunt caribou from the air over ANWR.
He’s very busy, especially in the summer, renting his sleigh out to billionaires to hunt caribou from the air over ANWR.
A man and his rifle
A mule and his hound
One in the saddle
One on the ground
A mule and his hound
One in the saddle
One on the ground
December 23, 2025 at 4:27 AM
A man and his rifle
A mule and his hound
One in the saddle
One on the ground
A mule and his hound
One in the saddle
One on the ground
Reposted by Matt Morain
Per NY Times’s Michael Grynbaum on X, this is Sharyn Alfonsi’s email to her “60 Minutes” colleagues in full:
December 22, 2025 at 3:37 AM
Per NY Times’s Michael Grynbaum on X, this is Sharyn Alfonsi’s email to her “60 Minutes” colleagues in full:
Really strong writing and a surprisingly funny Ariana Grande in last night's SNL. Shout out to the Kenan commitment to the Black Santa Claus courtroom sketch that clearly should've been cut after dress but probably got slated back in for production snafus / time?
December 21, 2025 at 4:33 PM
Really strong writing and a surprisingly funny Ariana Grande in last night's SNL. Shout out to the Kenan commitment to the Black Santa Claus courtroom sketch that clearly should've been cut after dress but probably got slated back in for production snafus / time?
Perfect.
Not a bad way to spend the afternoon
December 21, 2025 at 4:11 AM
Perfect.
Reposted by Matt Morain
Nebuchadnezzar, by William Blake, 1795-1805 (flipped) #NetflixPartner
December 20, 2025 at 5:39 AM
Nebuchadnezzar, by William Blake, 1795-1805 (flipped) #NetflixPartner
Yes, the levels of bodily harm the Wet Bandits endure in Home Alone is unrealistic and they'd be dead many times over, but less believable to me is how many DIY projects Kevin gets done between mass and dinner.
December 19, 2025 at 5:17 PM
Yes, the levels of bodily harm the Wet Bandits endure in Home Alone is unrealistic and they'd be dead many times over, but less believable to me is how many DIY projects Kevin gets done between mass and dinner.
attention @themountaingoats.bsky.social
too much bad news lately, so I’m sharing this song my son wrote. it is the most annoying song I’ve ever heard in my entire life.
![It is to my very great chagrin that I hav written out alt text for these song lyrics:
I'm smarter than you
I'm smarter than you
eat a bowl of poo- poo
PoOPy PooPy d00- doo
youre dumber than me
you're dumber than me
wash that down with Pee-pee
tinkle winkle wee - wee
nya nya nya nya nya nya nya nya nya hya
I know more than you
you know less than me
nya nya nya nya nya hya nya nya nya nya
Dont forget to eat your Poo-poo
Don’t forget to drink your pee-per
[repeat from top]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:hyj5gdgpkql2bz7rbset3h33/bafkreiddcstf7y72jzfjs6mw7r44tvjpmojuxupkwzdqnvtpkeugwaossa@jpeg)
December 18, 2025 at 11:11 PM
attention @themountaingoats.bsky.social
17-year-olds are rarely fans of being held like babies.
December 17, 2025 at 10:03 PM
17-year-olds are rarely fans of being held like babies.
Reposted by Matt Morain
If we are banning cell phones for kids we need to be talking about banning chatbots for boomers
www.persuasion.community/p/my-chatgpt...
www.persuasion.community/p/my-chatgpt...
December 17, 2025 at 4:38 PM
If we are banning cell phones for kids we need to be talking about banning chatbots for boomers
www.persuasion.community/p/my-chatgpt...
www.persuasion.community/p/my-chatgpt...
Does a good captain not also run PT with his company?
that Chicagoans, when hazing you with Malört, will also consume it themselves is not at all mitigating, but rather speaks to the depravity inherent in the existence of this foul liquid, which defies physics by having an *escalating* aftertaste
Today’s That’s Marvelous newsletter is up featuring some thoughts about Judaism and community and nü-metal and Malört. Lots of umlauts this week. Read it all: www.thatsmarvelousnewsletter.com/162-malort-a...
December 16, 2025 at 8:44 PM
Does a good captain not also run PT with his company?
Whenever he breaks a bone it spawns into another child, who turns feral. He’s the Magwai of white quarterbacks.
I like Philip Rivers enough to want him to succeed a little, but I’m also a feral little rat-man who wants to see him explode into pieces from a Nick Emmanwori blitz
December 14, 2025 at 10:57 PM
Whenever he breaks a bone it spawns into another child, who turns feral. He’s the Magwai of white quarterbacks.
Reposted by Matt Morain
ANUBIS: (presses button with paw) [guilty]
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
November 2, 2025 at 12:23 PM
ANUBIS: (presses button with paw) [guilty]
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
OSIRIS: im sorry he does this when he's hungry
ANUBIS: (button) [guilty] [bad] [food]
OSIRIS: you already ate
ANUBIS: (button) [bad] [bad] [bad]
OSIRIS: he's right though we weighed your heart against the feather and its not looking good
Every single role ever done by Kevin James would have been 100 times better if done by Melissa McCarthy.
December 9, 2025 at 4:24 AM
Every single role ever done by Kevin James would have been 100 times better if done by Melissa McCarthy.
Reposted by Matt Morain
this whole thread
My parents were free-wheeling Boomers convinced things were only ever going to get better, financially. They had good reason, then. They could afford a house, car, and weekly nights out on two full time assistant manager jobs at a fast food chain. But they also got caught up in emulating wealth trap
December 8, 2025 at 1:04 AM
this whole thread