Dan Heilman
@danheilman.bsky.social
Coming to you from that oasis of sanity they call St. Paul, Minn.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
My narcissism recovery is going so well we made a TV show about it
November 6, 2025 at 2:52 PM
My narcissism recovery is going so well we made a TV show about it
Reposted by Dan Heilman
Gutted to learn Gilson Lavis has left the material world. Squeeze has been such a formative influence & inspiration on me since I was a teenager, and it was a privilege to have seen him play with them live so many times (and with Jools Holland solo, where I took this). An incredible drummer. RIP 🙏🥁
November 6, 2025 at 1:14 PM
Gutted to learn Gilson Lavis has left the material world. Squeeze has been such a formative influence & inspiration on me since I was a teenager, and it was a privilege to have seen him play with them live so many times (and with Jools Holland solo, where I took this). An incredible drummer. RIP 🙏🥁
Yes. Her.
a man in a white shirt is standing in front of a window and saying her .
ALT: a man in a white shirt is standing in front of a window and saying her .
media.tenor.com
November 5, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Yes. Her.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
It's amazing that Dick Cheney was able to live 12 years with a human heart.
November 4, 2025 at 4:10 PM
It's amazing that Dick Cheney was able to live 12 years with a human heart.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
You HATE THIS CITY.
You HATE THIS CITY ON ROCK AND ROLL
You HATE THIS CITY ON ROCK AND ROLL
November 4, 2025 at 5:18 PM
You HATE THIS CITY.
You HATE THIS CITY ON ROCK AND ROLL
You HATE THIS CITY ON ROCK AND ROLL
Today's Star-Tribune features obituaries of people with the surnames Hell and Dickmeier.
November 2, 2025 at 2:51 PM
Today's Star-Tribune features obituaries of people with the surnames Hell and Dickmeier.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
geddy lee claps for the blue jays in 7/4 time
November 2, 2025 at 1:55 AM
geddy lee claps for the blue jays in 7/4 time
Time for the @startribune.com Variety section's quarterly feature about Dessa. Kate DiCamillo's turn should be coming soon.
November 1, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Time for the @startribune.com Variety section's quarterly feature about Dessa. Kate DiCamillo's turn should be coming soon.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
that’s right beg you miserable worm
October 29, 2025 at 8:28 PM
that’s right beg you miserable worm
Reposted by Dan Heilman
COUNT I
Kat Abughazaleh did, while law enforcement was in heated pursuit, paint what appeared to be the entrance to a cave on a sheer rock wall, causing law enforcement to forcibly bonk into said wall.
COUNT II
The same thing on a different wall, but then a train came out and ran us over???
Kat Abughazaleh did, while law enforcement was in heated pursuit, paint what appeared to be the entrance to a cave on a sheer rock wall, causing law enforcement to forcibly bonk into said wall.
COUNT II
The same thing on a different wall, but then a train came out and ran us over???
October 29, 2025 at 5:44 PM
COUNT I
Kat Abughazaleh did, while law enforcement was in heated pursuit, paint what appeared to be the entrance to a cave on a sheer rock wall, causing law enforcement to forcibly bonk into said wall.
COUNT II
The same thing on a different wall, but then a train came out and ran us over???
Kat Abughazaleh did, while law enforcement was in heated pursuit, paint what appeared to be the entrance to a cave on a sheer rock wall, causing law enforcement to forcibly bonk into said wall.
COUNT II
The same thing on a different wall, but then a train came out and ran us over???
Saturday, KSTP-1500, ESPN Radio affiliate that usually carries most MLB playoff games, ran St. Thomas hockey instead of game 2 of LA-Toronto. Monday, instead of that game 3 classic? Loons soccer.
I get that they have contracts with those teams, but pre-empting the World Series? Dumb.
I get that they have contracts with those teams, but pre-empting the World Series? Dumb.
October 28, 2025 at 11:45 AM
Saturday, KSTP-1500, ESPN Radio affiliate that usually carries most MLB playoff games, ran St. Thomas hockey instead of game 2 of LA-Toronto. Monday, instead of that game 3 classic? Loons soccer.
I get that they have contracts with those teams, but pre-empting the World Series? Dumb.
I get that they have contracts with those teams, but pre-empting the World Series? Dumb.
SYBIL: What're you doing?
BASIL: I'm kissing you, dear.
SYBIL: Well, don't.
R.I.P. to one of the all-time scene stealers, Prunella Scales.
BASIL: I'm kissing you, dear.
SYBIL: Well, don't.
R.I.P. to one of the all-time scene stealers, Prunella Scales.
October 28, 2025 at 11:26 AM
SYBIL: What're you doing?
BASIL: I'm kissing you, dear.
SYBIL: Well, don't.
R.I.P. to one of the all-time scene stealers, Prunella Scales.
BASIL: I'm kissing you, dear.
SYBIL: Well, don't.
R.I.P. to one of the all-time scene stealers, Prunella Scales.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
When the dental hygienist isn’t interested in THE TRUTH about fluoride
October 27, 2025 at 3:24 AM
When the dental hygienist isn’t interested in THE TRUTH about fluoride
The issue isn't really *that* funny.
October 24, 2025 at 1:06 PM
The issue isn't really *that* funny.
The monotone that Paul Allen takes on when the Vikings are about to lose is the funniest thing you can hear on radio.
October 19, 2025 at 8:10 PM
The monotone that Paul Allen takes on when the Vikings are about to lose is the funniest thing you can hear on radio.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
Better to admit you walked through the wrong door than spend your life in the wrong room.
October 10, 2025 at 6:30 PM
Better to admit you walked through the wrong door than spend your life in the wrong room.
Two classic live albums were recorded in spaces that normally functioned as cafeterias: 'Johnny Cash at Folsom Prison' and 'Live at Leeds.'
October 10, 2025 at 5:39 PM
Two classic live albums were recorded in spaces that normally functioned as cafeterias: 'Johnny Cash at Folsom Prison' and 'Live at Leeds.'
Reposted by Dan Heilman
Translation: I'm dying and I am so scared. I am going to die. Stop putting me on stage. Someone hold me.
October 9, 2025 at 4:24 PM
Translation: I'm dying and I am so scared. I am going to die. Stop putting me on stage. Someone hold me.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
Just as a reminder, Bondi’s origin story in Trump world is that she said she was going to investigate Trump University, Trump sent her a $25K check and the investigation disappeared. She later became Trump’s personal defense lawyer. So yeah, don’t challenge her integrity.
Bondi to Blumenthal: "You lied. How dare you? I'm a career prosecutor. Don't you ever challenge my integrity. Do not question my ability to be fair and impartial."
October 7, 2025 at 3:42 PM
Just as a reminder, Bondi’s origin story in Trump world is that she said she was going to investigate Trump University, Trump sent her a $25K check and the investigation disappeared. She later became Trump’s personal defense lawyer. So yeah, don’t challenge her integrity.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
The Bob Newhart Show's opening credits notably feature the Cooper Black typeface, after it was made famous in 1966 by the use in the artwork for the Beach Boys Pet Sounds album.
September 29, 2025 at 12:28 AM
The Bob Newhart Show's opening credits notably feature the Cooper Black typeface, after it was made famous in 1966 by the use in the artwork for the Beach Boys Pet Sounds album.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
The monotone that Paul Allen takes on when the Vikings are about to lose is the funniest thing you can hear on radio.
September 15, 2025 at 11:09 AM
The monotone that Paul Allen takes on when the Vikings are about to lose is the funniest thing you can hear on radio.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
The free speech activist who built a list of professors he worked to get fired for their speech must be celebrated for his support of free speech, and anyone who quotes his speech accurately in context will be fired and/or face state punishment by the champions of free speech, do I have that right?
September 15, 2025 at 2:43 PM
The free speech activist who built a list of professors he worked to get fired for their speech must be celebrated for his support of free speech, and anyone who quotes his speech accurately in context will be fired and/or face state punishment by the champions of free speech, do I have that right?
The monotone that Paul Allen takes on when the Vikings are about to lose is the funniest thing you can hear on radio.
September 15, 2025 at 11:09 AM
The monotone that Paul Allen takes on when the Vikings are about to lose is the funniest thing you can hear on radio.
Reposted by Dan Heilman
BUT NOT LIKE THAT, DIANE
January 5, 2025 at 7:15 PM
BUT NOT LIKE THAT, DIANE
Reposted by Dan Heilman
Finally started peeing at a urinal without pulling his pants all the way down to his ankles
September 5, 2025 at 5:09 PM
Finally started peeing at a urinal without pulling his pants all the way down to his ankles