Pasta Fazool
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christopherdowning.bsky.social
Pasta Fazool
@christopherdowning.bsky.social
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Chairs are pretty great.

You can fight a lion, or sit if you want.
The worst thing to happen in the world lately has to be me being in between two different holes on my belt.
November 10, 2025 at 10:17 PM
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*tapping fingernails repeatedly on a headstone* today we're gonna do an unboxing! it's grandma!
June 5, 2025 at 11:17 AM
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An app that identifies plants.
Not by species, it just gives you their full Christian name.
November 9, 2025 at 3:19 PM
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On a scale of 1 to 10 for hotness, I would rate myself a good listener
November 17, 2024 at 12:40 PM
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an orca patiently sitting through a Geico commercial before it can watch a boat sinking tutorial on youtube
May 13, 2024 at 9:55 PM
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[Catholic church]

*priest hands out "What To Expect At Your Exorcism"

Husband: Babe, this isn't counseling
Me: You said you'd try anything
October 31, 2025 at 7:09 PM
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gonna meet a guy for a coffee date like it’s 2001. can’t wait til im in the sex in the city reboot.
November 10, 2025 at 6:15 PM
If you play the movie dirty dancing backwards, it confirms that the real paul mccartney died in the 60's.
November 10, 2025 at 3:41 PM
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I’ve started making pharmaceuticals in my garage if anyone wants to save a few bucks.
November 10, 2025 at 2:04 PM
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Speed dating is when you have to tell Keanu Reeves a little bit about yourself or this bus will explode
November 10, 2025 at 2:15 PM
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warby parker sounds like an asshole kid at a boarding school
November 9, 2025 at 6:39 PM
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mr gorbachev, i just sat on my balls
November 10, 2025 at 3:34 PM
All is fair in love and cake war.
November 9, 2025 at 4:28 PM
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to my new followers- are you a ghost? you have to tell me if you’re a ghost, or else it’s entrapment
November 9, 2025 at 8:36 AM
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Male pattern kindness
November 9, 2025 at 12:39 AM
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Woke up at 5 to get an early start on being tired
November 9, 2025 at 12:17 PM
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If you’ve dated more than one Walter you’re letting them Walts right into your life.
November 9, 2025 at 2:32 PM
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Getting old is so extra. I used to just wake and bake but now I wake and ache and bake.
November 9, 2025 at 12:26 PM
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You wouldn’t be the first person to go to bed with me on account of my skills with a George Foreman grill, let me tell you.
November 9, 2025 at 3:11 PM
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My work here is dumb
November 8, 2025 at 3:51 PM
Fuck, marry, kill:

Political Asylum
Insane Asylum
Soul Asylum
November 8, 2025 at 6:05 PM
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*brings a first aid kit to a knife fight*
November 8, 2025 at 6:04 PM
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50% of rabbit foot keychains are actually rabbit hand keychains
November 8, 2025 at 6:00 AM
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the best thing about a Fleshlight is it doesn't cut your dick up like a real flashlight
November 7, 2025 at 4:28 PM
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The only thing that stands between you and your dreams are all the things you suck at
November 8, 2025 at 12:42 PM