Alice the Astute
@alicethelast.bsky.social
I promise I’ll be nice…ish. I clearly don’t take profile writing seriously. Closet geek. Drummer.
My posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:wzvrrov45zvoom7mhdoqym7f/feed/aaajqitparkn6
My posts: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:wzvrrov45zvoom7mhdoqym7f/feed/aaajqitparkn6
Pinned
Every disaster movie starts with scientists being ignored. Good thing we’re not doing that.
How a euphemism is born 😆
October 29, 2025 at 10:08 PM
How a euphemism is born 😆
A smart person doesn’t have to tell you they’re smart.
October 20, 2025 at 5:14 AM
A smart person doesn’t have to tell you they’re smart.
What was up with our grade 3 teachers?
August 19, 2025 at 11:32 PM
What was up with our grade 3 teachers?
The internet has made it possible to know everything about a stranger’s daily routine yet impossible to find a customer service phone number.
August 11, 2025 at 10:29 PM
The internet has made it possible to know everything about a stranger’s daily routine yet impossible to find a customer service phone number.
Reposted by Alice the Astute
If you see someone struggling here, respond. If you don’t have the time or energy to respond, repost.
Like it or not we are a community and we need to help each other
Like it or not we are a community and we need to help each other
June 20, 2025 at 10:43 PM
If you see someone struggling here, respond. If you don’t have the time or energy to respond, repost.
Like it or not we are a community and we need to help each other
Like it or not we are a community and we need to help each other
Weapons of mass destruction? Didn’t the US already use that one?
June 19, 2025 at 4:56 AM
Weapons of mass destruction? Didn’t the US already use that one?
You know what you rarely hear from politicians? “My constituents say…”
May 20, 2025 at 10:07 PM
You know what you rarely hear from politicians? “My constituents say…”
Reposted by Alice the Astute
Resiliency.
That’s it. That’s the skeet.
That’s it. That’s the skeet.
May 1, 2025 at 12:49 AM
Resiliency.
That’s it. That’s the skeet.
That’s it. That’s the skeet.
Reposted by Alice the Astute
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, getting up will surely blow it
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, getting up will surely blow it
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
April 27, 2025 at 12:42 PM
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, getting up will surely blow it
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
If you’re happy and you know it, getting up will surely blow it
If you’re happy and you know it, stay in bed
Reposted by Alice the Astute
Wrestled your mom in an Arby's parking lot
April 22, 2025 at 9:54 PM
Wrestled your mom in an Arby's parking lot
Reposted by Alice the Astute
Saving my bangers for signal
April 21, 2025 at 2:36 PM
Saving my bangers for signal
Reposted by Alice the Astute
Friendly reminder. In the United States, criminals are entitled to due process. Even if you pay hush money rig an election, steal top secret documents, or incite a mob to overthrow the government; no matter how egregious your crimes, you’re entitled to due process.
April 19, 2025 at 4:15 PM
Friendly reminder. In the United States, criminals are entitled to due process. Even if you pay hush money rig an election, steal top secret documents, or incite a mob to overthrow the government; no matter how egregious your crimes, you’re entitled to due process.
Reposted by Alice the Astute
The war on Easter is more of a covert operation. Yesterday I saw a Christmas tree done up with Easter decorations in a church basement. I think it was under cover trying to get insider information on the holiday to bring back to Christmas 🤔
April 19, 2025 at 10:30 AM
The war on Easter is more of a covert operation. Yesterday I saw a Christmas tree done up with Easter decorations in a church basement. I think it was under cover trying to get insider information on the holiday to bring back to Christmas 🤔
Reposted by Alice the Astute
rip Jesus... you woulda loved RuPaul's Drag Race Superstar
April 19, 2025 at 6:04 AM
rip Jesus... you woulda loved RuPaul's Drag Race Superstar
Reposted by Alice the Astute
guess who has three hands and just got fired from the morgue
October 19, 2024 at 3:15 PM
guess who has three hands and just got fired from the morgue
Why is it Christians only focus on the war on Christmas? What about Easter? I’ve yet to see anyone complain about being wished a “Hoppy Holiday!”
April 18, 2025 at 5:52 PM
Why is it Christians only focus on the war on Christmas? What about Easter? I’ve yet to see anyone complain about being wished a “Hoppy Holiday!”
Reposted by Alice the Astute
Did you know you can just not?
April 17, 2025 at 3:03 PM
Did you know you can just not?
Reposted by Alice the Astute
batman: i bought you a drink
catwoman: *smiles while slowly knocking the drink off the bar*
catwoman: *smiles while slowly knocking the drink off the bar*
April 17, 2025 at 5:43 PM
batman: i bought you a drink
catwoman: *smiles while slowly knocking the drink off the bar*
catwoman: *smiles while slowly knocking the drink off the bar*
Reposted by Alice the Astute
l just plugged the usb into my laptop, in the correct hole, on the first try.
So it IS possible, guys.
IT. IS. POSSIBLE.
So it IS possible, guys.
IT. IS. POSSIBLE.
April 17, 2025 at 2:20 PM
l just plugged the usb into my laptop, in the correct hole, on the first try.
So it IS possible, guys.
IT. IS. POSSIBLE.
So it IS possible, guys.
IT. IS. POSSIBLE.
America: Where Harvard loses its tax exempt status but the Church of Scientology doesn’t.
April 17, 2025 at 5:01 AM
America: Where Harvard loses its tax exempt status but the Church of Scientology doesn’t.
Reposted by Alice the Astute
3 things autistic kids will actually never do:
1. Pick up a roadkill bear from the side of the road and put it in their van to eat
2. Realize they could get in trouble for eating the bear
3. Leave it in Central Park to frame a cyclist for its murder
1. Pick up a roadkill bear from the side of the road and put it in their van to eat
2. Realize they could get in trouble for eating the bear
3. Leave it in Central Park to frame a cyclist for its murder
WATCH | RFK Jr claims autistic children will never go on dates or pay taxes
Read the recent CDC autism report here: www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a...
Read the recent CDC autism report here: www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a...
April 17, 2025 at 4:38 AM
3 things autistic kids will actually never do:
1. Pick up a roadkill bear from the side of the road and put it in their van to eat
2. Realize they could get in trouble for eating the bear
3. Leave it in Central Park to frame a cyclist for its murder
1. Pick up a roadkill bear from the side of the road and put it in their van to eat
2. Realize they could get in trouble for eating the bear
3. Leave it in Central Park to frame a cyclist for its murder
Reposted by Alice the Astute
Welcome to all my new followers. Breakfast is hot dogs at 6:15 am sharp.
April 17, 2025 at 1:08 AM
Welcome to all my new followers. Breakfast is hot dogs at 6:15 am sharp.
Reposted by Alice the Astute
I encourage everyone to show up to my funeral and make up any backstory they like.
April 17, 2025 at 1:22 AM
I encourage everyone to show up to my funeral and make up any backstory they like.