oh, youre here from tik tok? (chuckle's lightly ) Is that like reddit for babies

every new restaurant in every major city is either called Thistle+Thorn and thinks adding turmeric to brussel sprouts makes them worth $30 or is called Burger Bitch and has a neon sign in the window that says “im gonna fuck a hamburger”

picking up a new hobby has several important stages but the most critical one - by far - in determining whether the hobby will be a passing fancy or become a more permanent part of your identity is finding the hobby's subreddit and whether the community there is weirdly insightful or weirdly rude

Cat Clinging To Side Of Christmas Tree Admits That Was Extent Of Plan
theonion.com/cat-clinging...

“Holy infant so tender and mild” will never not be funny, don’t write lyrics when you’re hungry.

might fuck around and spend the night vomiting

i love when bands have faggots in them

20 million people joined this site this year and it seems that only 1500 or so understand what a joke is

bluesky devs are adding a quiplash feature where two posters go head to head on a single joke and whoever gets the fewest likes is permanently banned

following anyone for any reason is problematic. why can't you mind your own business and be happy just reading your own tweets

this post made my jaw drop and if you know me from twitter at the beginning of this year you’d know why 😭

owning a nice heavy classic style crowbar kicks ass cause you can walk around the house holding it anytime you want and it always feels great

Choose wisely

the people many of us left twitter to get away from seem oddly baffled by a lot of folks not wanting them here

(Realizing i zoned out for 15 years and have a family now without noticing) (Realizing I never committed my beautiful child's name to memory) You - (forgetting if we have hogs or not but going with my gut feeling) Feed them hogs