The Needling
@theneedling.com
Seattle's Only Real Fake News
(Satire/Parody)
Have a hot headline tip? Send it to Submit@TheNeedling.com
TheNeedling.com
(Satire/Parody)
Have a hot headline tip? Send it to Submit@TheNeedling.com
TheNeedling.com
Reposted by The Needling
I could throw you a few bagel politics jokes?
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
New @theneedling.com headline: Seattleite unsure what to do now their mayor isn’t an utter monster.
November 11, 2025 at 1:00 AM
I could throw you a few bagel politics jokes?
Reposted by The Needling
I mean, the Seattle Times thinks we need Bellevue to be relevant to Seattle so maybe he should just go on behalf of it.
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Mayor Harrell Salutes Homeless Veterans as Unified Care Team Sweeps Them into Tukwila
In his first Veterans Day as mayor of Seattle, today Bruce Harrell thanked and saluted hundreds of local homeless veterans as his newly formed Unified Care Team compassionately swept them into Tukw…
theneedling.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:29 AM
I mean, the Seattle Times thinks we need Bellevue to be relevant to Seattle so maybe he should just go on behalf of it.
Reposted by The Needling
I can feel the glee in this headline all the way from 2022. 😂
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Mayor Harrell Salutes Homeless Veterans as Unified Care Team Sweeps Them into Tukwila
In his first Veterans Day as mayor of Seattle, today Bruce Harrell thanked and saluted hundreds of local homeless veterans as his newly formed Unified Care Team compassionately swept them into Tukw…
theneedling.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:31 AM
I can feel the glee in this headline all the way from 2022. 😂
Reposted by The Needling
I’ve lived here since 2020 and I’ve had Durkan and Harrell as mayors. Idk what it’s like to have someone that isn’t utter crap.
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
New @theneedling.com headline: Seattleite unsure what to do now their mayor isn’t an utter monster.
November 11, 2025 at 6:46 AM
I’ve lived here since 2020 and I’ve had Durkan and Harrell as mayors. Idk what it’s like to have someone that isn’t utter crap.
Reposted by The Needling
Did you see this one or were you speaking in generalities?👀 Clearly Seattle just likes to be edged 😹
(The article itself is hilarious, too)
#Seattle #KatieWilson #SeattleMayor
bsky.app/profile/then...
(The article itself is hilarious, too)
#Seattle #KatieWilson #SeattleMayor
bsky.app/profile/then...
Dominatrix Adds Tracking Seattle Mayoral Election Results to BDSM Repertoire: tinyurl.com/mpravv8m
November 11, 2025 at 2:05 AM
Did you see this one or were you speaking in generalities?👀 Clearly Seattle just likes to be edged 😹
(The article itself is hilarious, too)
#Seattle #KatieWilson #SeattleMayor
bsky.app/profile/then...
(The article itself is hilarious, too)
#Seattle #KatieWilson #SeattleMayor
bsky.app/profile/then...
Reposted by The Needling
Luckily there is still a monster in the white house.
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
New @theneedling.com headline: Seattleite unsure what to do now their mayor isn’t an utter monster.
November 11, 2025 at 3:15 AM
Luckily there is still a monster in the white house.
Reposted by The Needling
Well well well, how the turnsweeps.
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Mayor Harrell Salutes Homeless Veterans as Unified Care Team Sweeps Them into Tukwila
In his first Veterans Day as mayor of Seattle, today Bruce Harrell thanked and saluted hundreds of local homeless veterans as his newly formed Unified Care Team compassionately swept them into Tukw…
theneedling.com
November 11, 2025 at 3:14 AM
Well well well, how the turnsweeps.
Reposted by The Needling
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Mayor Harrell Salutes Homeless Veterans as Unified Care Team Sweeps Them into Tukwila
In his first Veterans Day as mayor of Seattle, today Bruce Harrell thanked and saluted hundreds of local homeless veterans as his newly formed Unified Care Team compassionately swept them into Tukw…
theneedling.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:11 AM
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Reposted by The Needling
RIP
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
New @theneedling.com headline: Seattleite unsure what to do now their mayor isn’t an utter monster.
November 11, 2025 at 1:29 AM
RIP
Reposted by The Needling
Pineapple. Pineapple! PINEAPPLE!
Dominatrix Adds Tracking Seattle Mayoral Election Results to BDSM Repertoire: tinyurl.com/mpravv8m
November 11, 2025 at 1:28 AM
Pineapple. Pineapple! PINEAPPLE!
Well well well, how the turnsweeps.
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Mayor Harrell Salutes Homeless Veterans as Unified Care Team Sweeps Them into Tukwila
In his first Veterans Day as mayor of Seattle, today Bruce Harrell thanked and saluted hundreds of local homeless veterans as his newly formed Unified Care Team compassionately swept them into Tukw…
theneedling.com
November 11, 2025 at 3:14 AM
Well well well, how the turnsweeps.
Reposted by The Needling
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
New @theneedling.com headline: Seattleite unsure what to do now their mayor isn’t an utter monster.
November 11, 2025 at 12:43 AM
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Mayor Harrell Salutes Homeless Veterans as Unified Care Team Sweeps Them into Tukwila
In his first Veterans Day as mayor of Seattle, today Bruce Harrell thanked and saluted hundreds of local homeless veterans as his newly formed Unified Care Team compassionately swept them into Tukw…
theneedling.com
November 11, 2025 at 2:11 AM
From 2022. Maybe this year they can help sweep Bruce back to Bellevue.
Reposted by The Needling
a great loss to the local satire community tbh
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
New @theneedling.com headline: Seattleite unsure what to do now their mayor isn’t an utter monster.
November 11, 2025 at 12:59 AM
a great loss to the local satire community tbh
Reposted by The Needling
November 10, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
New @theneedling.com headline: Seattleite unsure what to do now their mayor isn’t an utter monster.
November 11, 2025 at 12:43 AM
Seriously. What are we gonna fucking do?!
Reposted by The Needling
hold your breath for 3 minutes!
November 10, 2025 at 11:58 PM
hold your breath for 3 minutes!
November 10, 2025 at 11:50 PM
Reposted by The Needling
While most people are focusing on the negatives of starving poor people right before the holidays, some are saying ending SNAP food stamp benefits could be good for businesses like Doug Rifter’s Torch & Pitchfork Emporium.
‘End of SNAP Benefits Could Be Good for Business,’ Says Owner of Torch & Pitchfork Emporium: tinyurl.com/48mw8sr6
November 10, 2025 at 4:27 PM
While most people are focusing on the negatives of starving poor people right before the holidays, some are saying ending SNAP food stamp benefits could be good for businesses like Doug Rifter’s Torch & Pitchfork Emporium.
Reposted by The Needling
“Wipe that smile off your face–did I say she fucking won? Has anyone said she’s won?” Madame Payne said as she cracked a whip. “Don’t jinx this you little bitch or I’m getting the electric nipple clamps out.”
Dominatrix Adds Tracking Seattle Mayoral Election Results to BDSM Repertoire: tinyurl.com/mpravv8m
November 10, 2025 at 5:06 PM
“Wipe that smile off your face–did I say she fucking won? Has anyone said she’s won?” Madame Payne said as she cracked a whip. “Don’t jinx this you little bitch or I’m getting the electric nipple clamps out.”
Reposted by The Needling
‘End of SNAP Benefits Could Be Good for Business,’ Says Owner of Torch & Pitchfork Emporium: tinyurl.com/48mw8sr6
November 9, 2025 at 4:20 PM
‘End of SNAP Benefits Could Be Good for Business,’ Says Owner of Torch & Pitchfork Emporium: tinyurl.com/48mw8sr6
“Wipe that smile off your face–did I say she fucking won? Has anyone said she’s won?” Madame Payne said as she cracked a whip. “Don’t jinx this you little bitch or I’m getting the electric nipple clamps out.”
Dominatrix Adds Tracking Seattle Mayoral Election Results to BDSM Repertoire: tinyurl.com/mpravv8m
November 10, 2025 at 5:06 PM
“Wipe that smile off your face–did I say she fucking won? Has anyone said she’s won?” Madame Payne said as she cracked a whip. “Don’t jinx this you little bitch or I’m getting the electric nipple clamps out.”
Reposted by The Needling
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November 10, 2025 at 3:47 PM
Support us here: www.patreon.com/TheNeedling
While most people are focusing on the negatives of starving poor people right before the holidays, some are saying ending SNAP food stamp benefits could be good for businesses like Doug Rifter’s Torch & Pitchfork Emporium.
‘End of SNAP Benefits Could Be Good for Business,’ Says Owner of Torch & Pitchfork Emporium: tinyurl.com/48mw8sr6
November 10, 2025 at 4:27 PM
While most people are focusing on the negatives of starving poor people right before the holidays, some are saying ending SNAP food stamp benefits could be good for businesses like Doug Rifter’s Torch & Pitchfork Emporium.
Reposted by The Needling
I only buy my pitchforks at the Capitol Hill Farmer’s Market
November 9, 2025 at 7:51 PM
I only buy my pitchforks at the Capitol Hill Farmer’s Market