smillz
smillz.lol
smillz
@smillz.lol
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The existence of bed rotting implies the existence of bed thriving
May 26, 2025 at 2:53 PM
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accepting thoughts and prayers in this trying time (nothings happening i’m just dumb sometimes and it bites me in the ass)
May 26, 2025 at 6:13 PM
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i just think “yacht” ought not to be spelled like that
May 26, 2025 at 6:31 PM
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for legal reasons i will not be breaking the law
May 26, 2025 at 6:42 PM
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who called it charging your emotional battery when flattery was right there?
May 20, 2025 at 9:40 PM
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‘28 Years Later’, which is a zombie movie, is coming out soon

bluesky is “dead”, so now a zombie

COINCIDENCE ?? I THINK NOT
May 26, 2025 at 6:23 PM
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I never believed it was butter
May 25, 2025 at 6:21 PM
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gonna slip the chiropractor an extra $20 to break my neck
May 26, 2025 at 4:38 PM
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Whoever called it “intelligent design” clearly didn’t consider how our eating hole doubles as a breathing hole, which any choking victim would tell you is far from intelligent.
May 24, 2025 at 9:31 AM
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One simple trick I’ve discovered to avoid picking a watermelon that isn’t ripe: just buy ice cream and don’t get watermelon.
May 25, 2025 at 8:38 PM
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I’m assuming that if I understand the language correctly, in France bonfires are considered a good thing?
May 24, 2025 at 12:35 AM
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The hardest part of this new diet is where to hide all the bodies.
May 26, 2025 at 2:37 AM
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Cooking at Home is a ploy by Big Kitchen Mess to sell more Kitchen Mess
May 26, 2025 at 4:58 PM
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i hate fathers day what do you even buy for a man you don't know
May 25, 2025 at 6:57 PM
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narcissus? more like narcissme am i right
May 26, 2025 at 3:23 PM
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People say “I’m at a loss for words” -
and then ramble on for an hour.
May 21, 2025 at 7:12 PM
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lilo & stitch fans love telling on people because snitches get stitches
May 26, 2025 at 5:13 PM
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shout out to the dude outside my bedroom window with the handheld camcorder for keeping it old school
May 24, 2025 at 4:51 AM
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maybe it’s borderline personality disorder, maybe it’s maybelline
May 23, 2025 at 1:48 PM