omgponies
@shitcrime.com
Award winning celebrity pet psychic.
Part time freelance test pilot.
Part time freelance test pilot.
Whoever is on the UX decision making committee for Google Colab’s Google Drive interaction should be publicly tortured to serve as an example to others.
December 15, 2025 at 7:32 PM
Whoever is on the UX decision making committee for Google Colab’s Google Drive interaction should be publicly tortured to serve as an example to others.
Reposted by omgponies
gravy boats imply the existence of gravy maritime law
December 14, 2025 at 1:06 AM
gravy boats imply the existence of gravy maritime law
Reposted by omgponies
All hate, no cattle.
December 12, 2025 at 10:51 PM
All hate, no cattle.
Reposted by omgponies
I’ve worked in public libraries for 20 years, today was the first time we’ve had to tell someone they couldn’t bring their chainsaw in the library.
December 11, 2025 at 1:30 AM
I’ve worked in public libraries for 20 years, today was the first time we’ve had to tell someone they couldn’t bring their chainsaw in the library.
Reposted by omgponies
[Guy whose dick fell off because there's a girl in star wars] I would probably do well in a civil war
December 11, 2025 at 2:13 AM
[Guy whose dick fell off because there's a girl in star wars] I would probably do well in a civil war
Back when the Sony Aibo came out in like ‘99, I can recall dudes on Slashdot joke about abusing it. I found this distasteful, mostly picturing them doing it to a real dog.
Fast forward to my days lately and I basically just call Claude Code a fucking moron all day.
Fast forward to my days lately and I basically just call Claude Code a fucking moron all day.
December 10, 2025 at 9:19 PM
Back when the Sony Aibo came out in like ‘99, I can recall dudes on Slashdot joke about abusing it. I found this distasteful, mostly picturing them doing it to a real dog.
Fast forward to my days lately and I basically just call Claude Code a fucking moron all day.
Fast forward to my days lately and I basically just call Claude Code a fucking moron all day.
Reposted by omgponies
SKULL OF THOMAS AQUINAS: TAKE A LEFT NOW
PRIEST: No, the GPS says we have to keep going—
SKULL: I KNOW A SHORTCUT
PRIEST: Do you remember the last ti—
SKULL: FOR THOSE WITH FAITH, NO EVIDENCE IS NECESSARY; FOR THOSE WITHOUT IT, NO EVIDENCE WILL SUFFICE
PRIEST: No, the GPS says we have to keep going—
SKULL: I KNOW A SHORTCUT
PRIEST: Do you remember the last ti—
SKULL: FOR THOSE WITH FAITH, NO EVIDENCE IS NECESSARY; FOR THOSE WITHOUT IT, NO EVIDENCE WILL SUFFICE
'Skull of St. Thomas Aquinas being transported to Fossanova Abbey.'
Photograph by Daniel Ibanez
Photograph by Daniel Ibanez
December 10, 2025 at 5:10 PM
SKULL OF THOMAS AQUINAS: TAKE A LEFT NOW
PRIEST: No, the GPS says we have to keep going—
SKULL: I KNOW A SHORTCUT
PRIEST: Do you remember the last ti—
SKULL: FOR THOSE WITH FAITH, NO EVIDENCE IS NECESSARY; FOR THOSE WITHOUT IT, NO EVIDENCE WILL SUFFICE
PRIEST: No, the GPS says we have to keep going—
SKULL: I KNOW A SHORTCUT
PRIEST: Do you remember the last ti—
SKULL: FOR THOSE WITH FAITH, NO EVIDENCE IS NECESSARY; FOR THOSE WITHOUT IT, NO EVIDENCE WILL SUFFICE
These messages are all within the same minute. They acknowledge it is down again, then say it is working, definitely is not.
Fun fact: you can’t request a credit for outages while one is happening and they won’t credit for outages due to weather or maintenance.
Fuck Xfinity.
Fun fact: you can’t request a credit for outages while one is happening and they won’t credit for outages due to weather or maintenance.
Fuck Xfinity.
December 9, 2025 at 2:19 AM
These messages are all within the same minute. They acknowledge it is down again, then say it is working, definitely is not.
Fun fact: you can’t request a credit for outages while one is happening and they won’t credit for outages due to weather or maintenance.
Fuck Xfinity.
Fun fact: you can’t request a credit for outages while one is happening and they won’t credit for outages due to weather or maintenance.
Fuck Xfinity.
I don’t know when I made this playlist but this just cracked me up.
December 3, 2025 at 3:57 AM
I don’t know when I made this playlist but this just cracked me up.
I think that everything ICE is doing is indefensible and they make me sick. But also there’s a guy next to me at the hospital who has been blasting TikTok on his phone with no headphones for an hour replaying Radiohead and Cash clips and at this point I’d be fine if they took this one guy.
November 26, 2025 at 6:17 PM
I think that everything ICE is doing is indefensible and they make me sick. But also there’s a guy next to me at the hospital who has been blasting TikTok on his phone with no headphones for an hour replaying Radiohead and Cash clips and at this point I’d be fine if they took this one guy.
Reposted by omgponies
In 2016 I was sitting outside a cafe in Paris and this guy walked towards me with a “Russian” supermodel on his arm and he absolutely ate shit right in front of me just as I was thinking “isn’t this the Lakers front row real estate guy?” She helped him up and they hobbled on in alligator boots.
I know who this guy is solely cause he lives in Jackie Treehorn's house
November 20, 2025 at 2:31 AM
In 2016 I was sitting outside a cafe in Paris and this guy walked towards me with a “Russian” supermodel on his arm and he absolutely ate shit right in front of me just as I was thinking “isn’t this the Lakers front row real estate guy?” She helped him up and they hobbled on in alligator boots.
Reposted by omgponies
Easy choice if you're a deer deciding where to buy a house
November 17, 2025 at 3:53 PM
Easy choice if you're a deer deciding where to buy a house
Reposted by omgponies
No Bull is running an ad to “be weird” and like encouraging being different and creative. When meanwhile the only people I’ve ever seen wear their stuff are just CrossFit bros or military bros, the least weird or creative people I’ve ever seen.
November 12, 2025 at 4:41 AM
No Bull is running an ad to “be weird” and like encouraging being different and creative. When meanwhile the only people I’ve ever seen wear their stuff are just CrossFit bros or military bros, the least weird or creative people I’ve ever seen.
In like 2018 I was walking my dogs outside of my apartment and a guy cut me off on one of those no hands self balancing scooter things. He was loudly talking on a Bluetooth earpiece and carrying two Starbucks coffees.
He immediately crashed, legs up and arms flailing, coffee and toy flying.
He immediately crashed, legs up and arms flailing, coffee and toy flying.
had an awful day. please reply with your favorite memory someone that totally ate shit in a physical way that isn’t a total bummer
November 12, 2025 at 2:53 AM
In like 2018 I was walking my dogs outside of my apartment and a guy cut me off on one of those no hands self balancing scooter things. He was loudly talking on a Bluetooth earpiece and carrying two Starbucks coffees.
He immediately crashed, legs up and arms flailing, coffee and toy flying.
He immediately crashed, legs up and arms flailing, coffee and toy flying.
Reposted by omgponies
"babies are born worshipping unknown gods" is one of the most incredible dwarf fortress bugs i have heard of. its poetry.
November 11, 2025 at 4:18 PM
"babies are born worshipping unknown gods" is one of the most incredible dwarf fortress bugs i have heard of. its poetry.
Reposted by omgponies
Please help, I've fallen down the Temu screaming goat throw pillow rabbithole
November 11, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Please help, I've fallen down the Temu screaming goat throw pillow rabbithole
Reposted by omgponies
(king missile "detachable penis" voice) inflatable corn maze
inflatable corn maze
New uncanny valley unlocked: inflatable corn maze for urban fall fests.
November 9, 2025 at 4:03 AM
(king missile "detachable penis" voice) inflatable corn maze
Reposted by omgponies
capitalism rules, I love doing extensive research any time I need to replace something because roughly 94% of all products are scam garbage
November 7, 2025 at 11:51 AM
capitalism rules, I love doing extensive research any time I need to replace something because roughly 94% of all products are scam garbage
Reposted by omgponies
November 5, 2025 at 6:54 PM
Reposted by omgponies
Who is going to remind Alan Dershowitz of his promise
November 5, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Who is going to remind Alan Dershowitz of his promise
Reposted by omgponies
genuinely beautiful that new york elected a muslim lefty mayor the same day that dick cheney died
November 5, 2025 at 2:41 AM
genuinely beautiful that new york elected a muslim lefty mayor the same day that dick cheney died
Reposted by omgponies
It's not in this article but the government asserts that the sandwich was thrown at "point blank range", which implies subway sandwiches have defined effective weapon ranges of varying lethality, and I would like to see the government's chart of these ranges.
Trial Begins for Man Accused of Lobbing a Sandwich at a Federal Agent www.nytimes.com/2025/11/03/u...
Trial Begins for Man Accused of Lobbing a Sandwich at a Federal Agent
www.nytimes.com
November 3, 2025 at 9:14 PM
It's not in this article but the government asserts that the sandwich was thrown at "point blank range", which implies subway sandwiches have defined effective weapon ranges of varying lethality, and I would like to see the government's chart of these ranges.