@nomnomnick.bsky.social
Reposted
[walks out on stage with six elderly women]
sharks, i’ve invented fucking your moms
sharks, i’ve invented fucking your moms
February 18, 2026 at 3:54 AM
[walks out on stage with six elderly women]
sharks, i’ve invented fucking your moms
sharks, i’ve invented fucking your moms
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[Alien family passing Earth]
*door lock noise*
*door lock noise*
July 27, 2023 at 3:29 PM
[Alien family passing Earth]
*door lock noise*
*door lock noise*
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dad how are babies made?
WHEN TWO PEOPLE FUCK NOW GO TO SLEEP
what’s wrong dad?
JESUS CHRIST YOURE 40
WHEN TWO PEOPLE FUCK NOW GO TO SLEEP
what’s wrong dad?
JESUS CHRIST YOURE 40
June 28, 2025 at 5:35 AM
dad how are babies made?
WHEN TWO PEOPLE FUCK NOW GO TO SLEEP
what’s wrong dad?
JESUS CHRIST YOURE 40
WHEN TWO PEOPLE FUCK NOW GO TO SLEEP
what’s wrong dad?
JESUS CHRIST YOURE 40
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the deal i struck with burger king
May 26, 2025 at 2:56 AM
the deal i struck with burger king
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That was CCR with Bad Moon Rising. You're listening to WKFM. Folks, I woke up in the studio today but I remember leaving last night, so I musta fallen into a fugue on the 105 again. Ten hours I can't account for. Blood on my shirt and it isn't mine. Up next, those Hanson boys serve up another Mmmbop
April 9, 2025 at 4:30 AM
That was CCR with Bad Moon Rising. You're listening to WKFM. Folks, I woke up in the studio today but I remember leaving last night, so I musta fallen into a fugue on the 105 again. Ten hours I can't account for. Blood on my shirt and it isn't mine. Up next, those Hanson boys serve up another Mmmbop
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A glaringly obvious cry for attention from the moon once again 🙄
May 11, 2025 at 12:37 PM
A glaringly obvious cry for attention from the moon once again 🙄
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Today is the National Breeding Kink Safety Awareness Day
May 11, 2025 at 2:40 PM
Today is the National Breeding Kink Safety Awareness Day
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[dribbles between my legs and behind my back]
guy at the urinal next to me: dude
guy at the urinal next to me: dude
February 28, 2025 at 3:26 AM
[dribbles between my legs and behind my back]
guy at the urinal next to me: dude
guy at the urinal next to me: dude
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It's Dog Anxiety Awareness Week. Please take a moment to punch your neighbor who keeps setting off illegal fireworks.
May 6, 2025 at 2:30 PM
It's Dog Anxiety Awareness Week. Please take a moment to punch your neighbor who keeps setting off illegal fireworks.
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I don’t think I’ve made a worse financial decision in my life than developing good taste
April 17, 2025 at 12:58 AM
I don’t think I’ve made a worse financial decision in my life than developing good taste
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There's no amount of angry/afraid/depressed you can be that's going to make the world decide to change any faster, so why not just push back when and how you can and otherwise enjoy what there is to enjoy?
April 16, 2025 at 7:49 PM
There's no amount of angry/afraid/depressed you can be that's going to make the world decide to change any faster, so why not just push back when and how you can and otherwise enjoy what there is to enjoy?
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Björk Performs Benefit Concert For Wilted Sunflowers In Mushroom Forest
theonion.com/bjork-p...
theonion.com/bjork-p...
April 15, 2025 at 3:00 PM
Björk Performs Benefit Concert For Wilted Sunflowers In Mushroom Forest
theonion.com/bjork-p...
theonion.com/bjork-p...
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thankfully, i built up an immunity to societal collapse by microdosing it daily for the last ten years or so
April 7, 2025 at 3:09 PM
thankfully, i built up an immunity to societal collapse by microdosing it daily for the last ten years or so
Nature is flourishing and there’s a beautiful woodpecker outside of my house! Aaaaaaaaaaand it’s driving me insane and I want to kill all birds now?
March 27, 2025 at 3:42 PM
Nature is flourishing and there’s a beautiful woodpecker outside of my house! Aaaaaaaaaaand it’s driving me insane and I want to kill all birds now?
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first guy in history to invent a locking door was probably a KNOWN freak in the village
March 15, 2025 at 2:20 AM
first guy in history to invent a locking door was probably a KNOWN freak in the village
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Man desperate to be asked about his feelings(fighting tears): you…you smell like wrongdawg
March 12, 2025 at 12:50 PM
Man desperate to be asked about his feelings(fighting tears): you…you smell like wrongdawg
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Mayor of LA: someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my city is dying
March 5, 2025 at 11:54 PM
Mayor of LA: someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. my city is dying
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me: the marshmallows can be little butt plugs
cereal exec: we're not making Dild-Os
cereal exec: we're not making Dild-Os
January 7, 2024 at 6:53 AM
me: the marshmallows can be little butt plugs
cereal exec: we're not making Dild-Os
cereal exec: we're not making Dild-Os
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i remember when sucker MCs were the biggest threat on the horizon
March 10, 2025 at 5:29 AM
i remember when sucker MCs were the biggest threat on the horizon