Mulva 2.0
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mulva74.bsky.social
Mulva 2.0
@mulva74.bsky.social
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Pepperidge Farm Remembers What You Did Last Summer
November 17, 2025 at 11:44 PM
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I want to get hospitalized for exhaustion like a celebrity.
November 17, 2025 at 1:19 PM
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“I’m down for whatever,” I say, falling asleep.
October 31, 2025 at 12:16 AM
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I don’t have any answers, but I do have a few good questions.
October 29, 2025 at 10:45 PM
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It’s gonna take a lot more than that to change my mind. Maybe do a magic trick or something
November 16, 2025 at 1:41 PM
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Some things we simply cannot know on this plane: is there a god? What is our purpose? Where did all my iTunes music go? The lyrics to Rocket Man etc…
November 16, 2025 at 1:42 PM
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Doggy style so I can sign my divorce papers
November 11, 2025 at 2:50 PM
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After a certain age men in light colored jeans look ridiculous
November 11, 2025 at 2:49 PM
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Turned over a new leaf and found an angry scorpion
November 9, 2025 at 5:26 PM
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When I’m buying Twinkies and Yodels it feels like I’m 16 again buying a dirty magazine
November 14, 2025 at 9:05 PM
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Me, as a therapist: Please, you think that's bad? I've been searching for my lost shaker of salt all this time.
November 15, 2025 at 10:45 PM
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Looking for someone who shares my love of stuffing.
October 31, 2025 at 2:51 AM
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her: have you been moisturizing?

me: oh no...that's just pizza grease.
October 31, 2025 at 10:41 AM
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Might sell Avon door to door as a side hustle
November 15, 2025 at 5:37 AM
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My Uncle Jeb is so stupid. He fell out of a tree while raking leaves.
November 10, 2025 at 2:37 AM
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Do we have independent confirmation that Chumbawamba really drank a whiskey drink, a vodka drink, a lager drink, and a cider drink? That’s a lot for most people.
November 12, 2025 at 5:59 PM
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Me: I have a very livid memory

Her: Don’t you mean vivid?

Me: No…
November 15, 2025 at 4:08 PM
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MY EDITOR: I think you need to make the main character more human. He's just completely unlikeable.

ME: *taking back my autobiography* Um...
November 10, 2025 at 1:35 PM
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I remember one time my wife got mad at me for accidentally stepping on a spider so I said 'calm down PETA Parker' lol, and you guys, that did not help. At all.
November 13, 2025 at 6:15 PM
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Sometimes I'll sit and contemplate the meaning of life and other times I'll wonder if the plural of manatee is 'manatees' or 'menatee'
November 14, 2025 at 12:24 PM
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A roll-on anti-aging serum, call it Deolderant
November 14, 2025 at 8:29 PM
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I'm not one to brag, but I totally got out of bed today without coaxing.
November 7, 2025 at 12:31 PM
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This is my crippling anxiety post. There are many like it, but this one is mine.
November 8, 2025 at 1:10 PM
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One of the skills I put on my resume was the ability to keenly observe other people working.
November 10, 2025 at 1:14 PM
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If you run past your neighbors scratching your crotch and screaming they tend to not ask questions.
November 12, 2025 at 1:15 PM