Kyle Rolinatis
@kylerolinatis.bsky.social
Horror author and aspiring cat lady - active member of the HWA
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
[running into my ex]
ex: omg it’s you
me: yeah
ex: we should exchange numbers
me: i don’t think that’s a good idea
ex: you backed into my car though
me: look we’ve both moved on
ex: omg it’s you
me: yeah
ex: we should exchange numbers
me: i don’t think that’s a good idea
ex: you backed into my car though
me: look we’ve both moved on
December 27, 2024 at 11:03 PM
[running into my ex]
ex: omg it’s you
me: yeah
ex: we should exchange numbers
me: i don’t think that’s a good idea
ex: you backed into my car though
me: look we’ve both moved on
ex: omg it’s you
me: yeah
ex: we should exchange numbers
me: i don’t think that’s a good idea
ex: you backed into my car though
me: look we’ve both moved on
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
love being a writer. love poring over a single sentence for hours just editing and replacing words until i end up with the exact same sentence i started with
July 16, 2024 at 10:38 PM
love being a writer. love poring over a single sentence for hours just editing and replacing words until i end up with the exact same sentence i started with
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
Overheard someone hiss into their phone, “I realize that, but I cannot miss Theodore’s bassoon recital,” and now I have a new catch-all excuse
February 21, 2024 at 7:38 PM
Overheard someone hiss into their phone, “I realize that, but I cannot miss Theodore’s bassoon recital,” and now I have a new catch-all excuse
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
[being chased by killer]
ME: *frantically pressing crosswalk button*
ME: *frantically pressing crosswalk button*
November 16, 2024 at 11:48 PM
[being chased by killer]
ME: *frantically pressing crosswalk button*
ME: *frantically pressing crosswalk button*
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
Me: so you're saying I'm as healthy as a horse
Doctor: *loading a gun* in a way...
Doctor: *loading a gun* in a way...
November 17, 2024 at 3:52 PM
Me: so you're saying I'm as healthy as a horse
Doctor: *loading a gun* in a way...
Doctor: *loading a gun* in a way...
Anyone know a divorce attorney? I asked my husband to get some sister wives for me because I’m too tired to clean the house today and he said “nah- I don’t have time for that” 😕
November 17, 2024 at 1:46 PM
Anyone know a divorce attorney? I asked my husband to get some sister wives for me because I’m too tired to clean the house today and he said “nah- I don’t have time for that” 😕
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
Let’s stop doomscrolling and get some writing done.
November 10, 2024 at 11:35 PM
Let’s stop doomscrolling and get some writing done.
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
[yelling over club music] Do you think we’re ever truly forgiven
November 9, 2024 at 10:33 PM
[yelling over club music] Do you think we’re ever truly forgiven
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
years of eating food beyond its expiration date has prepared me for an FDA under RFK Jr 😤
November 10, 2024 at 3:48 AM
years of eating food beyond its expiration date has prepared me for an FDA under RFK Jr 😤
COVER REVEAL! My novella The Harbinger will be released this summer. I just couldn’t wait to share this amazing cover that Ruth Anna Evans designed. Pre-orders will be up in a few months! 🐦⬛
March 9, 2024 at 11:35 PM
COVER REVEAL! My novella The Harbinger will be released this summer. I just couldn’t wait to share this amazing cover that Ruth Anna Evans designed. Pre-orders will be up in a few months! 🐦⬛
I had a dream last night I was at a party and Stephen King, Joe Hill, and Owen King were all there and SK graciously gave me an idea for a story scribbled on a napkin. I woke up and remembered the idea - it was “robot president” 🤦♀️🥲 🤖🤣
March 5, 2024 at 11:05 AM
I had a dream last night I was at a party and Stephen King, Joe Hill, and Owen King were all there and SK graciously gave me an idea for a story scribbled on a napkin. I woke up and remembered the idea - it was “robot president” 🤦♀️🥲 🤖🤣
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
It’s important to be the crazier one in the relationship
December 9, 2023 at 4:55 PM
It’s important to be the crazier one in the relationship
John Wick sent me a Goodreads friend request. Why does it feel like accepting OR declining could go poorly? 😱
December 3, 2023 at 12:32 PM
John Wick sent me a Goodreads friend request. Why does it feel like accepting OR declining could go poorly? 😱
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
telling anyone who asks what my religion is that I believe every sandwich needs a bit of crunch
November 30, 2023 at 2:54 PM
telling anyone who asks what my religion is that I believe every sandwich needs a bit of crunch
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
(the library fills with fragrant pipe smoke as I clack away at the typewriter) Grimace was pregnant, and more than likely it was the Hamburglar's child
November 23, 2023 at 6:14 PM
(the library fills with fragrant pipe smoke as I clack away at the typewriter) Grimace was pregnant, and more than likely it was the Hamburglar's child
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
Asking “which one of these guys is Taylor Swift” whenever a football game is on
November 26, 2023 at 8:29 PM
Asking “which one of these guys is Taylor Swift” whenever a football game is on
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
“Why do you post so often?”
Me:
Me:
November 19, 2023 at 4:55 PM
“Why do you post so often?”
Me:
Me:
Why am I like this?
November 16, 2023 at 1:17 PM
Why am I like this?
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
[inhales helium from balloon] Your mom and I are getting a divorce
November 2, 2023 at 3:21 AM
[inhales helium from balloon] Your mom and I are getting a divorce
Reposted by Kyle Rolinatis
When my sister was in 8th grade, a kid tried to insult her by saying "whatever, Walt Whitman" like it was an epic slam, and for over 20yrs it has been an argument ender in my family. Nothing can be said after the Whitman burn. Nothing survives the Walt.
November 4, 2023 at 5:57 PM
When my sister was in 8th grade, a kid tried to insult her by saying "whatever, Walt Whitman" like it was an epic slam, and for over 20yrs it has been an argument ender in my family. Nothing can be said after the Whitman burn. Nothing survives the Walt.