Simon
@broomwagon.bsky.social
Dad, dog owner, cycling, football and coffee nerd. Appeared on a regional TV quiz show in 1987, so basically an A lister.
My motto: always give 100%. Unless you are giving blood.
Bin day is Thursdays.
My motto: always give 100%. Unless you are giving blood.
Bin day is Thursdays.
Reposted by Simon
“Have I been an angry person at times in my life? Who hasn’t? If you’d crossed me at the peak of my tabloid notoriety, you soon would have known about it. I will hold my hands up & say I was mean to some people. Jennifer Aniston did not call me ‘that tiny scuttling slag with the ears’ for nothing."
November 14, 2025 at 12:55 PM
“Have I been an angry person at times in my life? Who hasn’t? If you’d crossed me at the peak of my tabloid notoriety, you soon would have known about it. I will hold my hands up & say I was mean to some people. Jennifer Aniston did not call me ‘that tiny scuttling slag with the ears’ for nothing."
Reposted by Simon
and nothing on the list by Ken Loach. what's that about?
It is imposdible to make a Top 100 list everyone agrees with…
BUT THIS LIST IS SO WRONG!!!!
variety.com/lists/best-c...
BUT THIS LIST IS SO WRONG!!!!
variety.com/lists/best-c...
The 100 Best Comedy Movies of All Time
Variety's list of the 100 best comedy movies of all time includes 'Annie Hall,' 'Pretty Woman,' 'Waiting for Guffman' and 'Young Frankenstein.'
variety.com
November 24, 2025 at 4:34 PM
and nothing on the list by Ken Loach. what's that about?
Here is that sick squid I owe you.
Glowing firefly squid along the coast of Tokyo, Japan
November 24, 2025 at 4:05 PM
Here is that sick squid I owe you.
Reposted by Simon
Glowing firefly squid along the coast of Tokyo, Japan
November 24, 2025 at 3:01 PM
Glowing firefly squid along the coast of Tokyo, Japan
Reposted by Simon
It is imposdible to make a Top 100 list everyone agrees with…
BUT THIS LIST IS SO WRONG!!!!
variety.com/lists/best-c...
BUT THIS LIST IS SO WRONG!!!!
variety.com/lists/best-c...
The 100 Best Comedy Movies of All Time
Variety's list of the 100 best comedy movies of all time includes 'Annie Hall,' 'Pretty Woman,' 'Waiting for Guffman' and 'Young Frankenstein.'
variety.com
November 24, 2025 at 3:47 PM
It is imposdible to make a Top 100 list everyone agrees with…
BUT THIS LIST IS SO WRONG!!!!
variety.com/lists/best-c...
BUT THIS LIST IS SO WRONG!!!!
variety.com/lists/best-c...
Reposted by Simon
Finishing a book is like saying goodbye to an old friend. Finishing a show you binge-watched is like staggering out of a motel where you’ve been holed up for 24 hours with someone you met while trying to score crack.
July 15, 2023 at 11:45 PM
Finishing a book is like saying goodbye to an old friend. Finishing a show you binge-watched is like staggering out of a motel where you’ve been holed up for 24 hours with someone you met while trying to score crack.
We're being told to use an AI tool at work. I inputted two short letters and asked it to create some questions based solely on those two documents and not to refer to any other information. Despite that, it still made up two names. It's like a very naughty child. I have thrashed it & sent it to bed
November 24, 2025 at 2:45 PM
We're being told to use an AI tool at work. I inputted two short letters and asked it to create some questions based solely on those two documents and not to refer to any other information. Despite that, it still made up two names. It's like a very naughty child. I have thrashed it & sent it to bed
Reposted by Simon
Messages from school to my parents in the 90s: Fill in the slip at the bottom & bring in £2 for the trip to the zoo
Messages from school now: Your child's exam schedule is on Zoop, login via the LernPortal to access it, the results will be on HoneyTree, their homework is on Zappp & NumberHub
Messages from school now: Your child's exam schedule is on Zoop, login via the LernPortal to access it, the results will be on HoneyTree, their homework is on Zappp & NumberHub
November 24, 2025 at 11:23 AM
Messages from school to my parents in the 90s: Fill in the slip at the bottom & bring in £2 for the trip to the zoo
Messages from school now: Your child's exam schedule is on Zoop, login via the LernPortal to access it, the results will be on HoneyTree, their homework is on Zappp & NumberHub
Messages from school now: Your child's exam schedule is on Zoop, login via the LernPortal to access it, the results will be on HoneyTree, their homework is on Zappp & NumberHub
Reposted by Simon
If I had a seafood restaurant, you can be assured I’d find some excuse to have ‘Squid Pro Quo’ on the menu.
November 23, 2025 at 12:48 AM
If I had a seafood restaurant, you can be assured I’d find some excuse to have ‘Squid Pro Quo’ on the menu.
Reposted by Simon
Some “AI” bot popped up on my work computer.
I think my job is safe
I think my job is safe
November 24, 2025 at 2:18 PM
Some “AI” bot popped up on my work computer.
I think my job is safe
I think my job is safe
Reposted by Simon
Reposted by Simon
The fun & games of buying 5 tickets for the 2026 Gent 6. Join the queue at 9am. 45 minutes later let in. find tickets, card is rejected. Try another card. Told "you've made too many attempts" & kicked out. Site crashes. My mate manages to get in, refreshes, ends up accidentally buying 10 tickets
November 24, 2025 at 10:54 AM
The fun & games of buying 5 tickets for the 2026 Gent 6. Join the queue at 9am. 45 minutes later let in. find tickets, card is rejected. Try another card. Told "you've made too many attempts" & kicked out. Site crashes. My mate manages to get in, refreshes, ends up accidentally buying 10 tickets
Reposted by Simon
"My stage name is Salt. This is Pepa. As our DJ and third member of our trio, would you like to keep the theme going and call yourself something like Cinnamon or Nutmeg or Oregano or Coriander or Paprika or Saffron or Cumin or Ginger or ..."
"SPINDERELLA IT IS!"
"SPINDERELLA IT IS!"
November 21, 2025 at 5:00 PM
"My stage name is Salt. This is Pepa. As our DJ and third member of our trio, would you like to keep the theme going and call yourself something like Cinnamon or Nutmeg or Oregano or Coriander or Paprika or Saffron or Cumin or Ginger or ..."
"SPINDERELLA IT IS!"
"SPINDERELLA IT IS!"
Reposted by Simon
"akld;mfpkowmmv.v,, doigj oij,af,.gmjs[oidmgoij[oic jocjqdgfaksdmg[ain.c,f-o”
Extract from 'An Infinite Number of Monkeys: the Early Years'
Extract from 'An Infinite Number of Monkeys: the Early Years'
November 21, 2025 at 4:16 PM
"akld;mfpkowmmv.v,, doigj oij,af,.gmjs[oidmgoij[oic jocjqdgfaksdmg[ain.c,f-o”
Extract from 'An Infinite Number of Monkeys: the Early Years'
Extract from 'An Infinite Number of Monkeys: the Early Years'
Reposted by Simon
Reposted by Simon
Me ad libbing in an exam where I revised the wrong topic
Google should be formally stripped of its status as a verb now anyway.
November 21, 2025 at 3:53 PM
Me ad libbing in an exam where I revised the wrong topic
Reposted by Simon
Best interdimensional portal from today’s walk.
November 21, 2025 at 3:46 PM
Best interdimensional portal from today’s walk.
Watching the cricket on TNT it turns out that Rob Hatch knows an awful lot about cricket, he doesn't sound like he's just memorised a crib sheet. Very impressive stuff.
November 21, 2025 at 3:44 PM
Watching the cricket on TNT it turns out that Rob Hatch knows an awful lot about cricket, he doesn't sound like he's just memorised a crib sheet. Very impressive stuff.
Reposted by Simon
I’m genuinely starting to fear hedgehogs
November 21, 2025 at 10:36 AM
I’m genuinely starting to fear hedgehogs
the police investigating the injury have said it's an open and shut case
Palmer fractures toe after stubbing it on door
Chelsea: Cole Palmer injured as he fractures toe in home accident
www.bbc.com
November 21, 2025 at 10:56 AM
the police investigating the injury have said it's an open and shut case
I woke up at tea time (you know what I mean) and my heart sank. Since then it's been belting, I was listening on my dog walk and so apologies to anyone who was startled by the sound of a middle aged man shouting and punching the air in the frosty woods. #thecricket
November 21, 2025 at 9:58 AM
I woke up at tea time (you know what I mean) and my heart sank. Since then it's been belting, I was listening on my dog walk and so apologies to anyone who was startled by the sound of a middle aged man shouting and punching the air in the frosty woods. #thecricket
Reposted by Simon
If there was any doubt, test match cricket is the greatest game that humans have invented, and possibly the high point of evolution.
November 21, 2025 at 9:50 AM
If there was any doubt, test match cricket is the greatest game that humans have invented, and possibly the high point of evolution.
Thoughts and prayers to anyone who has bought tickets for days 3 onwards for this Test.
November 21, 2025 at 9:51 AM
Thoughts and prayers to anyone who has bought tickets for days 3 onwards for this Test.