Boots (real person)
@bootsmcgoot.bsky.social
English, wordish, girlish, nerdish. lvl38 🌱 📚🐘 #elephacts
she/they
she/they
Pinned
just flew in from the Michelin Man lookalike competition, and boy are my arms tyres
today i am catching a flight to edinburgh. i hope. last time i tried to do this, years ago, i was delayed in traffic and missed my flight and had a huge meltdown, so i'm not at my MOST relaxed
November 28, 2025 at 11:35 AM
today i am catching a flight to edinburgh. i hope. last time i tried to do this, years ago, i was delayed in traffic and missed my flight and had a huge meltdown, so i'm not at my MOST relaxed
Reposted by Boots (real person)
BLACK FRIDAY SALE. Get my entire discography of parody music (three and a half hour's worth) for £11.
Actually, that's my deal ALL THE TIME!
Hell, if I sell 100 of them this weekend, I'll start work on a new album. What a call to action!
(You can also stream for free)
frizfrizzle.com
Actually, that's my deal ALL THE TIME!
Hell, if I sell 100 of them this weekend, I'll start work on a new album. What a call to action!
(You can also stream for free)
frizfrizzle.com
November 28, 2025 at 8:26 AM
BLACK FRIDAY SALE. Get my entire discography of parody music (three and a half hour's worth) for £11.
Actually, that's my deal ALL THE TIME!
Hell, if I sell 100 of them this weekend, I'll start work on a new album. What a call to action!
(You can also stream for free)
frizfrizzle.com
Actually, that's my deal ALL THE TIME!
Hell, if I sell 100 of them this weekend, I'll start work on a new album. What a call to action!
(You can also stream for free)
frizfrizzle.com
i love following @pftompkins.bsky.social. he's consistently funny and correct and yet i may NOT reply to him. keeps me humble
November 26, 2025 at 7:03 PM
i love following @pftompkins.bsky.social. he's consistently funny and correct and yet i may NOT reply to him. keeps me humble
how many semicolons can you use in a 3-sentence teams message before it's weird? asking for a me
November 26, 2025 at 5:18 PM
how many semicolons can you use in a 3-sentence teams message before it's weird? asking for a me
Reposted by Boots (real person)
oh hey it's me!
November 26, 2025 at 3:38 PM
oh hey it's me!
Reposted by Boots (real person)
Guy inventing capitalism - "The most efficient way to allocate resources would be if everyone was trying to trick each other all the time."
November 26, 2025 at 11:01 AM
Guy inventing capitalism - "The most efficient way to allocate resources would be if everyone was trying to trick each other all the time."
TIL it's "home in", not "hone in." gdi I've been using that wrong from the gecko
November 26, 2025 at 11:30 AM
TIL it's "home in", not "hone in." gdi I've been using that wrong from the gecko
Description: a hoofed beast with one slender leg held aloft. Its tusks point directly upward, and its slim trunk hangs limply. It is a delicate creature.
An ‘elephant done by a medieval artist that had never seen one’ - 15th century, London, Wellcome Library, MS.626, f. 228r
November 26, 2025 at 9:41 AM
Description: a hoofed beast with one slender leg held aloft. Its tusks point directly upward, and its slim trunk hangs limply. It is a delicate creature.
the collective noun for Vulcans is 'a sufficiency'
November 26, 2025 at 12:47 AM
the collective noun for Vulcans is 'a sufficiency'
oops. i am 8 weeks slow on thanking everyone for their birthday wishes on facebook. hey people i used to work with in my first call centre job! i still think of you often. even kenneth whose ear got bitten half off by his parrot, hello kenneth
November 25, 2025 at 2:48 PM
oops. i am 8 weeks slow on thanking everyone for their birthday wishes on facebook. hey people i used to work with in my first call centre job! i still think of you often. even kenneth whose ear got bitten half off by his parrot, hello kenneth
Reposted by Boots (real person)
Shows up in a “I put the HO in THONKSGIVING” baby tee
November 25, 2025 at 1:51 PM
Shows up in a “I put the HO in THONKSGIVING” baby tee
Reposted by Boots (real person)
Alternatively:
I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps queer women with their grasp
Of waists, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
Subtle sign of lesbians
(The humble and the lusty),
Carabiner
I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps queer women with their grasp
Of waists, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
Subtle sign of lesbians
(The humble and the lusty),
Carabiner
I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps rock climbers with their grasp
Of ropes, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
And closes with a subtle spring,
The humble and the trusty
Carabiner
That helps rock climbers with their grasp
Of ropes, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
And closes with a subtle spring,
The humble and the trusty
Carabiner
November 25, 2025 at 1:29 PM
Alternatively:
I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps queer women with their grasp
Of waists, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
Subtle sign of lesbians
(The humble and the lusty),
Carabiner
I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps queer women with their grasp
Of waists, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
Subtle sign of lesbians
(The humble and the lusty),
Carabiner
Reposted by Boots (real person)
I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps rock climbers with their grasp
Of ropes, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
And closes with a subtle spring,
The humble and the trusty
Carabiner
That helps rock climbers with their grasp
Of ropes, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
And closes with a subtle spring,
The humble and the trusty
Carabiner
October 23, 2025 at 10:06 AM
I heard there was a handy clasp
That helps rock climbers with their grasp
Of ropes, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
And closes with a subtle spring,
The humble and the trusty
Carabiner
That helps rock climbers with their grasp
Of ropes, and makes your keyring look much keener
It saves on space, it opens in,
And closes with a subtle spring,
The humble and the trusty
Carabiner
Reposted by Boots (real person)
I heard there was a mighty fish
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
November 24, 2025 at 5:29 PM
I heard there was a mighty fish
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
Reposted by Boots (real person)
November 24, 2025 at 11:46 PM
Reposted by Boots (real person)
George R R Nephew's 'Got Any Games On Your Throne?'
April 30, 2025 at 8:46 AM
George R R Nephew's 'Got Any Games On Your Throne?'
I heard there was a mighty fish
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
November 24, 2025 at 5:29 PM
I heard there was a mighty fish
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
With solitude its fervent wish
When hungry, their demeanour's even ruder
They're known to bite their prey in two
They'd even have a go at you
The silver and the salty
Barracuda
ok i really thought i'd be able to find a match but my search skills are failing me 😞 2cm four-hole fabric covered metal buttons - ideally pale / floral print but i'm flexible on that!
November 24, 2025 at 5:01 PM
ok i really thought i'd be able to find a match but my search skills are failing me 😞 2cm four-hole fabric covered metal buttons - ideally pale / floral print but i'm flexible on that!
Reposted by Boots (real person)
If you wanna have a good time and make people really laugh at a party ... I mean have you -? have you tried unhinged mode?
November 24, 2025 at 2:17 PM
If you wanna have a good time and make people really laugh at a party ... I mean have you -? have you tried unhinged mode?
Reposted by Boots (real person)
Canada is releasing a set of stamps celebrating the nation's graphic novelists.
These stamps feature Kate Beaton, Jimmy Beaulieu, Guy Delisle, Julie Doucet, Bryan Lee O’Malley and Michael Nicoll Yahgulanaas, alongside some of their famous works.
These stamps feature Kate Beaton, Jimmy Beaulieu, Guy Delisle, Julie Doucet, Bryan Lee O’Malley and Michael Nicoll Yahgulanaas, alongside some of their famous works.
November 21, 2025 at 7:06 PM
Canada is releasing a set of stamps celebrating the nation's graphic novelists.
These stamps feature Kate Beaton, Jimmy Beaulieu, Guy Delisle, Julie Doucet, Bryan Lee O’Malley and Michael Nicoll Yahgulanaas, alongside some of their famous works.
These stamps feature Kate Beaton, Jimmy Beaulieu, Guy Delisle, Julie Doucet, Bryan Lee O’Malley and Michael Nicoll Yahgulanaas, alongside some of their famous works.
the smoking crater where i used to be says "lol"
Twitter accounts are based in Russia. BlueSky accounts are based in homes with, frankly, too many books, plants, obsolete cables, and pieces of rustic pottery, that could do with a bit of a tidying up, to be honest.
November 24, 2025 at 11:51 AM
the smoking crater where i used to be says "lol"
Reposted by Boots (real person)
Once again the internet provides us with an immortal phrase that nobody will ever guess the context of.
The damned in hell are not more powerful for the fact that the fires do not consume them; it is part and parcel of their torment.
November 24, 2025 at 11:12 AM
Once again the internet provides us with an immortal phrase that nobody will ever guess the context of.
Reposted by Boots (real person)
Slept dreaming of, woke up thinking about the extraordinary What Resembles the Grave but Isn’t by Anne Boyer
November 24, 2025 at 9:30 AM
Slept dreaming of, woke up thinking about the extraordinary What Resembles the Grave but Isn’t by Anne Boyer