Stephan Zielinski
szielins.bsky.social
Stephan Zielinski
@szielins.bsky.social
Segmentation fault (core dumped)
Ran the dishwasher without water. Sudden hankering for raw milk.
July 9, 2025 at 10:17 PM
Anyone want to try suggesting to Musk he run Grok with Asimov's Three Laws of Robotics in the default prompt? I bet he's chicken there'd be a Computer Argues with Kirk pyrotechnic magic smoke release.
July 9, 2025 at 12:00 AM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
a lot of conservative memes are posted one-handed these days
June 25, 2025 at 1:21 PM
I have nothing to add; I just want to tag in @neolithicsheep.bsky.social‬ with another example of troops executing Half-Assed Mosey Thataway.
I did not edit this, this is the actual parade with the actual music being played.

CINEMATIC
June 14, 2025 at 11:55 PM
I have to wonder if Trump's blather about a "Golden Dome" jinxed Israel's iron one.
June 13, 2025 at 11:21 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
Possible to start to tell a unified story: "Trump is personally too old, crazy, and confused to run things, so at any given time the question is which co-president is in charge. At first it was Musk, & we got the crazy chaotic DOGE era. Then Navarro: a trade war that crashed markets. Now Miller..."
June 12, 2025 at 2:18 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
wait. they banned fat soldiers?? they band our large serving folks from the goddamn stands??? fuck this shit
Really important story - army officials asked soldiers to identify themselves if they don't agree with Trump's politics that way he'd get only supportive soldiers in uniform during his political rally on base. Heavier soldiers were also barred from participating.
Bragg Soldiers Who Cheered Trump's Political Attacks While in Uniform Were Checked for Allegiance, Appearance
As Trump viciously attacked his perceived political foes, he whipped up boos from the gathered troops directed at California leaders, including Gov. Gavin Newsom.
www.military.com
June 11, 2025 at 7:56 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
stop flagmogging us 😢 stop waving the cooler flag 😭😭 we thought eagles were our thing 😭😭 why's it eating a snake anyway 😭😭 betsy ross couldn't do all that she wasn't that good at sewing 😭😭
June 9, 2025 at 2:52 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
bluesky: you can yell at a senator
x: for a monthly fee, you can yell at a democratic senator
mastodon: we do not have any senators
threads: we have invented an entire platform to make senators feel as safe as possible while interacting with nabisco
June 9, 2025 at 7:40 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
Bluesky is a bubble chamber. It should copy Twitter’s algorithm, and randomly show you no context dashcam footage of lethal car crashes
June 9, 2025 at 2:56 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
I sometimes wonder if people who insist that everything is a distraction have to run their own errands. “This grocery trip is a distraction from the REAL issue, which is the weird noise my engine is making! The fact we’re out of toilet paper is a distraction from the REAL issue which is dinner!”
June 9, 2025 at 1:41 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
california is a long state so you could probably turn protests on and off in the north and south and just kite the national guard up and down the state.
June 9, 2025 at 1:47 AM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
If you want a distraction here’s a video I made about how I felt hearing the Bluey music for the first time
June 9, 2025 at 12:46 AM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
Something something charismatic leaders. This may or may not be about Dune. #Dune #Dunesky #Memes #Sietchposting
June 8, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
We’re happy to announce that in JAN, we became global trademark owners of the “Don’t tread on me!” and “State’s rights” slogans that were previously so popular in the US.

This has allowed their country to enjoy absolute silence from their previously vocal conservatives during events such as:

1/2
June 8, 2025 at 4:11 AM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
June 7, 2025 at 4:22 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
When the education is not liberating, the dream of the oppressed is to become the oppressor
June 6, 2025 at 11:38 AM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
I'm declaring today a one-day jubilee for normie jokes from normie Dems.
As a grandma (and on behalf of toddlers everywhere) I’ll say this Musk/Trump tantrum is worse than anything I’ve ever seen.
June 5, 2025 at 8:09 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
writing this down so I can tap it periodically to remind myself:

it’s still abuse of power even if I think the target and the outcome are both very funny
June 5, 2025 at 7:21 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
There are no songs about teachers that are all, “I didn’t understand Chemistry before your class.” Every song about a teacher involves a felony.
June 4, 2025 at 11:49 AM
Got my flag for Pride. For when you just want to say, "Civil rights for everybody--but other than that, I've given up":
June 4, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
There are 2 previous historical cases of countries destroying their science and universities, crippling them for decades: Lysenkoism in the USSR and Nazi Germany. The Trump administration will be the 3rd.
It's not just budgets but research, institutions, expertise, and training the next generation.
May 31, 2025 at 4:43 AM
Are we, at long last, going to see TACO trucks on every corner?
May 29, 2025 at 3:14 AM
Reposted by Stephan Zielinski
Flintstones sex shop selling a bottle of yabbadabbadoobricant that's just a foot tall prehistoric bird that you bash on the head so it yarps out a blap of grease
May 28, 2025 at 11:49 AM