Soupcan Steffans
@soupcansteffans.bsky.social
Unofficial fan account
He/him
He/him
Pinned
People like to shit on reply guys, but like, I was raised on MST3K. It's this or mediocre prop comedy
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
Was really into piggyback rides for a while, kinda got carried away
January 5, 2026 at 5:39 AM
Was really into piggyback rides for a while, kinda got carried away
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
Neither taken nor available, but a secret third thing (insufferable)
November 26, 2025 at 10:24 PM
Neither taken nor available, but a secret third thing (insufferable)
Slipping my therapist a ten-spot to diagnose me with something new and exotic
January 4, 2026 at 8:32 PM
Slipping my therapist a ten-spot to diagnose me with something new and exotic
Skip eats babies
January 4, 2026 at 8:11 PM
Skip eats babies
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
![Republicans
Kill the Poor Dead Kennedys
Democrats
Kill The Poor [Clean] Album - Dead Kennedys](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:6hjrvm3kyloukhykolhodhfn/bafkreidq5bhnpbna5jd7hb4apdqcr5jnzcsy2wck4dtgzskswsr3iy3axe@jpeg)
🎶 Don't speak, I know just what you're thinkin' 🎶
Me, thinking: Cannibals eat arm-to-table
Me, thinking: Cannibals eat arm-to-table
January 4, 2026 at 5:05 PM
🎶 Don't speak, I know just what you're thinkin' 🎶
Me, thinking: Cannibals eat arm-to-table
Me, thinking: Cannibals eat arm-to-table
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
I'm about $300 short still, and I would *really* like to get the rent covered by tomorrow.
I'm sorry, it feels so gross to have to post this during a crisis, but the world spins on and I still have to make rent. I'm about $350 short. Anything helps, especially shares. Thank you.
Pay Colonel Bosch's Mech Hanger
Tap to finalize your purchase. No PayPal account? No worries.
paypal.me
January 4, 2026 at 3:57 PM
I'm about $300 short still, and I would *really* like to get the rent covered by tomorrow.
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
The U.S. intervened to oust governments in Latin America a total of at least 41 times — about once every 28 months from 1898 to 1994 — including 17 cases of direct intervention by the U.S. armed forces, intelligence agencies, or locals employed by U.S. government agencies.
A 2023 analysis of the effects of CIA-sponsored regime change in five Latin American countries found the interventions caused “large declines in democracy scores, rule of law, freedom of speech, and civil liberties.” interc.pt/4sinphB
January 2, 2026 at 6:46 PM
The U.S. intervened to oust governments in Latin America a total of at least 41 times — about once every 28 months from 1898 to 1994 — including 17 cases of direct intervention by the U.S. armed forces, intelligence agencies, or locals employed by U.S. government agencies.
Less than 24 hours of vacation remaining and im handling it really well if you dont listen to my internal monolog
January 4, 2026 at 4:16 PM
Less than 24 hours of vacation remaining and im handling it really well if you dont listen to my internal monolog
Showing my naivete here I guess but whatever I thought being a rogue state sounded way cooler than this
January 4, 2026 at 5:32 AM
Showing my naivete here I guess but whatever I thought being a rogue state sounded way cooler than this
Side quests are good if you need some escapism from your escapism
January 4, 2026 at 2:28 AM
Side quests are good if you need some escapism from your escapism
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
we did it! a perfectly structured democracy. it's got checks, it's got balances. this thing is made to last. there's only one weakness: bad guys. if somehow some bad guys who don't care about decorum got elected they could basically just tip the whole thing over. luckily such men are unelectable
January 4, 2026 at 1:38 AM
we did it! a perfectly structured democracy. it's got checks, it's got balances. this thing is made to last. there's only one weakness: bad guys. if somehow some bad guys who don't care about decorum got elected they could basically just tip the whole thing over. luckily such men are unelectable
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
and what if some other country bombed our military bases & kidnapped president trump?
not so funny now is it?
no, because that would be hilarious actually.
not so funny now is it?
no, because that would be hilarious actually.
January 3, 2026 at 10:12 PM
and what if some other country bombed our military bases & kidnapped president trump?
not so funny now is it?
no, because that would be hilarious actually.
not so funny now is it?
no, because that would be hilarious actually.
I'll have you know MY SON was one of the BRAVE SOLDIERS who was forced AGAINST HIS WILL to kidnap a foreign leader. NONE of you understand the pressure HEAPED on these kids to follow the FOLLOW ORDERS on the covert operation my son called and filled me in on 5 MINUTES after the arrest
January 3, 2026 at 10:58 PM
I'll have you know MY SON was one of the BRAVE SOLDIERS who was forced AGAINST HIS WILL to kidnap a foreign leader. NONE of you understand the pressure HEAPED on these kids to follow the FOLLOW ORDERS on the covert operation my son called and filled me in on 5 MINUTES after the arrest
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
I'm sorry, it feels so gross to have to post this during a crisis, but the world spins on and I still have to make rent. I'm about $350 short. Anything helps, especially shares. Thank you.
Pay Colonel Bosch's Mech Hanger
Tap to finalize your purchase. No PayPal account? No worries.
paypal.me
January 3, 2026 at 8:52 PM
I'm sorry, it feels so gross to have to post this during a crisis, but the world spins on and I still have to make rent. I'm about $350 short. Anything helps, especially shares. Thank you.
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
repost to give those 2 or 3 followers who always like your weird posts a little forehead kiss & a grilled cheese cut diagonally
January 3, 2026 at 8:53 PM
repost to give those 2 or 3 followers who always like your weird posts a little forehead kiss & a grilled cheese cut diagonally
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
i bet this shit hits so hard if ur stupid
January 3, 2026 at 7:30 PM
i bet this shit hits so hard if ur stupid
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
"But Maduro likely stole an election." Ok well Bush DEFINITELY stole an election. I don't see yall cheering for his extradition to a foreign court and the bombing of Fort Worth.
It's almost like yall are stupid fucking dipshits that will swallow any neoliberal propaganda that crawls by.
It's almost like yall are stupid fucking dipshits that will swallow any neoliberal propaganda that crawls by.
January 3, 2026 at 11:51 AM
"But Maduro likely stole an election." Ok well Bush DEFINITELY stole an election. I don't see yall cheering for his extradition to a foreign court and the bombing of Fort Worth.
It's almost like yall are stupid fucking dipshits that will swallow any neoliberal propaganda that crawls by.
It's almost like yall are stupid fucking dipshits that will swallow any neoliberal propaganda that crawls by.
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
The Trump admin is what happens when you run the Bush admin through AI.
January 3, 2026 at 5:04 PM
The Trump admin is what happens when you run the Bush admin through AI.
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
I‘m discontinuing my social media use for the foreseeable future and I want to explain why.
I woke up in the new year to discover that some guy on here had saved photos I took on New Year’s Eve and used Grok to remove my clothes. I know this because he showed me.
I woke up in the new year to discover that some guy on here had saved photos I took on New Year’s Eve and used Grok to remove my clothes. I know this because he showed me.
January 3, 2026 at 2:25 PM
I‘m discontinuing my social media use for the foreseeable future and I want to explain why.
I woke up in the new year to discover that some guy on here had saved photos I took on New Year’s Eve and used Grok to remove my clothes. I know this because he showed me.
I woke up in the new year to discover that some guy on here had saved photos I took on New Year’s Eve and used Grok to remove my clothes. I know this because he showed me.
How do you take your water? Warm and soapy I hope
January 3, 2026 at 5:02 AM
How do you take your water? Warm and soapy I hope
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
interviewer: is there anything more you could tell us about yourself?
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
January 3, 2026 at 4:22 AM
interviewer: is there anything more you could tell us about yourself?
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
cookie monster: me want cooki-
interviewer: besides that
Sending this to every reporter who writes one of Those articles
January 3, 2026 at 3:49 AM
Sending this to every reporter who writes one of Those articles
[Designing a character with a toboggan-sized sword]
Okay guys, we need some special moves. There's only one wrong answer
"What about helico-"
[Death glare]
"-pter spin... but clockwise?"
MOTHER OF GOD.
Okay guys, we need some special moves. There's only one wrong answer
"What about helico-"
[Death glare]
"-pter spin... but clockwise?"
MOTHER OF GOD.
January 3, 2026 at 2:10 AM
[Designing a character with a toboggan-sized sword]
Okay guys, we need some special moves. There's only one wrong answer
"What about helico-"
[Death glare]
"-pter spin... but clockwise?"
MOTHER OF GOD.
Okay guys, we need some special moves. There's only one wrong answer
"What about helico-"
[Death glare]
"-pter spin... but clockwise?"
MOTHER OF GOD.
Reposted by Soupcan Steffans
If, being incredibly charitable, you didn’t intend to make a CSAM robot, not immediately turning off the CSAM robot when you find out you accidentally made a CSAM robot should still get you put in the magnetic boots prison from Face/Off
January 2, 2026 at 11:20 PM
If, being incredibly charitable, you didn’t intend to make a CSAM robot, not immediately turning off the CSAM robot when you find out you accidentally made a CSAM robot should still get you put in the magnetic boots prison from Face/Off