Awkward Egg
@sleepwalkingdog.bsky.social
Potatoes are overrated
Pinned
Watching the new Frankenstein movie. It's like a very dark Captain Birdseye origin story.
November 13, 2025 at 6:49 PM
Watching the new Frankenstein movie. It's like a very dark Captain Birdseye origin story.
Reposted by Awkward Egg
The last 2.5 years of Bluesky were a steady build up to "criticism of Jeffrey Epstein's writing ability is ableist." Congrats everyone, we did it.
November 13, 2025 at 2:12 AM
The last 2.5 years of Bluesky were a steady build up to "criticism of Jeffrey Epstein's writing ability is ableist." Congrats everyone, we did it.
Reposted by Awkward Egg
Just seen a video of Americans trying to use roundabouts and it's a lovely illustration of how stupid Americans are. Not that we need more illustrations of that, but still.
November 12, 2025 at 2:19 PM
Just seen a video of Americans trying to use roundabouts and it's a lovely illustration of how stupid Americans are. Not that we need more illustrations of that, but still.
He survived because somebody called a bondulance.
James Bond’s death in No Time to Die is causing a nightmare for the next film. Writers are stuck because Bond “was blown to pieces.”
Anthony Horowitz, author of three 007 novels, says:
“You can't have him wake up in shower and saying it was all a dream."
radaronline.com/p/james-bond...
Anthony Horowitz, author of three 007 novels, says:
“You can't have him wake up in shower and saying it was all a dream."
radaronline.com/p/james-bond...
November 11, 2025 at 11:57 AM
He survived because somebody called a bondulance.
Reposted by Awkward Egg
Columbo in his first episode looks like a dog that's just come back from the groomer
October 14, 2025 at 1:40 PM
Columbo in his first episode looks like a dog that's just come back from the groomer
They weren't serious about having to serve the full term, they were being sarkozy
November 10, 2025 at 3:07 PM
They weren't serious about having to serve the full term, they were being sarkozy
I reckon a party could get elected by having "ban private use/purchase of fireworks" as a policy.
November 9, 2025 at 5:48 PM
I reckon a party could get elected by having "ban private use/purchase of fireworks" as a policy.
"People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But they will never forget how you still hadn't put the heating on in November."
- Maya Angelou
- Maya Angelou
November 9, 2025 at 8:55 AM
"People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But they will never forget how you still hadn't put the heating on in November."
- Maya Angelou
- Maya Angelou
Reposted by Awkward Egg
England facing drastic measures due to extreme drought next year.
Country surrounded by water has water shortages.
2024: 1trn litre of lost to leaks.
Sewage dumped in rivers for 4m hours.
No new reservoirs.
Investment neglected, £85bn paid in dividend.
Record high water bills.
People fleeced.
Country surrounded by water has water shortages.
2024: 1trn litre of lost to leaks.
Sewage dumped in rivers for 4m hours.
No new reservoirs.
Investment neglected, £85bn paid in dividend.
Record high water bills.
People fleeced.
England facing drastic measures due to extreme drought next year
Government and water companies are devising emergency plans for worst water shortage in decades
www.theguardian.com
November 8, 2025 at 11:06 AM
England facing drastic measures due to extreme drought next year.
Country surrounded by water has water shortages.
2024: 1trn litre of lost to leaks.
Sewage dumped in rivers for 4m hours.
No new reservoirs.
Investment neglected, £85bn paid in dividend.
Record high water bills.
People fleeced.
Country surrounded by water has water shortages.
2024: 1trn litre of lost to leaks.
Sewage dumped in rivers for 4m hours.
No new reservoirs.
Investment neglected, £85bn paid in dividend.
Record high water bills.
People fleeced.
A Greek will. i. am impersonator called il. i. ad
November 8, 2025 at 7:50 PM
A Greek will. i. am impersonator called il. i. ad
When somebody's personal wealth reaches a billion dollars, they should be forced to choose between giving half of it to charity or visiting the Titanic in an OceanGate submarine.
Elon Musk is over on Twitter posting his sad/pathetic Ai prompts.
November 8, 2025 at 7:05 PM
When somebody's personal wealth reaches a billion dollars, they should be forced to choose between giving half of it to charity or visiting the Titanic in an OceanGate submarine.
Reposted by Awkward Egg
do you know how horrid and evil you have to be to be in this much pain in public and everyone still hates you
Elon Musk is over on Twitter posting his sad/pathetic Ai prompts.
November 8, 2025 at 5:41 PM
do you know how horrid and evil you have to be to be in this much pain in public and everyone still hates you
Who called it Darkest Hour and not Slough Houses of Parliament
November 8, 2025 at 6:48 PM
Who called it Darkest Hour and not Slough Houses of Parliament
Reposted by Awkward Egg
If you are a paedophile, alert your neighbours by setting off fireworks from your garden.
November 1, 2025 at 7:42 PM
If you are a paedophile, alert your neighbours by setting off fireworks from your garden.
Reposted by Awkward Egg
almost posted a thought about Mamdani then remembered this tweet
November 5, 2025 at 7:21 PM
almost posted a thought about Mamdani then remembered this tweet
Someone on Facebook is selling a cast iron Christ and now I want to watch Mask (1985).
November 8, 2025 at 12:34 PM
Someone on Facebook is selling a cast iron Christ and now I want to watch Mask (1985).
Sitting on my arse eating biscuits and have just been reminded about the half marathon I signed up for in a few months. 😬
November 8, 2025 at 11:37 AM
Sitting on my arse eating biscuits and have just been reminded about the half marathon I signed up for in a few months. 😬
Just saw an advert for "Fesshole Live" and did a bit of sick in my mouth.
November 8, 2025 at 11:18 AM
Just saw an advert for "Fesshole Live" and did a bit of sick in my mouth.
Reposted by Awkward Egg
I made a “how do you do, fellow kids?” joke to someone in their mid 20s who, it turns out, was too young to have heard of that meme.
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
November 7, 2025 at 5:28 PM
I made a “how do you do, fellow kids?” joke to someone in their mid 20s who, it turns out, was too young to have heard of that meme.
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
So “how do you do, fellow kids?” is now an example of “how do you do, fellow kids?”
The Thing 2: The Thinger
John Carpenter says he's working on a sequel to 'The Thing'
"We'll see"
"We'll see"
November 8, 2025 at 8:22 AM
The Thing 2: The Thinger
Reposted by Awkward Egg
the greatest youtube comment of all time
November 7, 2025 at 9:28 PM
the greatest youtube comment of all time
Anyway, last night I had a dream that I became a millionaire by selling t-shirts with "May contain nuts" written on them. That's exciting isn't it.
November 8, 2025 at 8:17 AM
Anyway, last night I had a dream that I became a millionaire by selling t-shirts with "May contain nuts" written on them. That's exciting isn't it.
Reposted by Awkward Egg
I'm 60, and I'm absolutely fucked.
November 8, 2025 at 8:05 AM
I'm 60, and I'm absolutely fucked.