Empress of the Internet
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johubris.bsky.social
Empress of the Internet
@johubris.bsky.social
Jo Hubris, Lady Boom herself, spokesvagina, one of -those- fat queers or “blue-haired alphabet mafia” apparently. She/her
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“Mutual Orgasm” is an incredible flex from the Good Neighbor State
PornHub’s new VDay map is bleak. Age verification laws have done so much damage
February 14, 2026 at 2:46 AM
A reminder from the past that’s relevant today too
February 14, 2026 at 7:53 AM
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Hey you! Want to learn new cooking techniques and recipes in a safe space with your queer community? Sure you do! Join our next session of THEY ATE on Feb 25 where we'll make Mediterranean chicken & couscous. It's a FREE class so reserve your space here docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1F...
February 14, 2026 at 6:16 AM
Excuse me, I should probably let you know that your valentine for me hasn't arrived yet? What's going on?
February 14, 2026 at 6:34 AM
I couldn’t figure out what I wanted for breakfast so I napped all afternoon instead & I think this is a pretty good sign that I am in overload mode and dealing with a really difficult person pushed me over the edge yesterday. Now I have lost a whole day’s worth of time to work in and am overwhelmed
February 14, 2026 at 5:34 AM
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If it works, it destroys everyone's jobs and that's terrible for us.

If it doesn't work, it burns down the economy and that's terrible for us.

I struggle to find a reason to share their enthusiasm.
February 14, 2026 at 3:24 AM
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So this is how it went down? #nzpol

> plans made to keep poo out of water
> "SEPARATING POO FROM WATER IS RACIST AGAINST WHITE PEOPLE! ELECT US GOVERNMENT TO STOP IT!"
> they are elected
> poo is in the water
February 14, 2026 at 3:25 AM
So why would they come here if they were looking for a government that cares?
February 14, 2026 at 4:43 AM
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wow we’re just saying the quiet part out loud now huh
February 13, 2026 at 8:52 AM
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This is the way. When they come at us, we come back at them twofold. Raise that Pride flag every time they take it down. If they prevent that, surround the park with Pride flags. Ruin their petty little lives until they shit rainbows. Never stop. www.nytimes.com/2026/02/12/n...
N.Y.C. Officials Reinstate Pride Flag at Stonewall After Federal Removal
www.nytimes.com
February 13, 2026 at 4:56 AM
I saw a reel on Facebook that said "Connor Storrie in the movie of 'Song of Achilles' when???" and I have never needed anything more in my life. He would absolutely be the best fuckboi Achilles ever

And I will take Karen's ashes to the movie theatre when it comes out (no I won't but).
February 13, 2026 at 3:38 AM
The amount of tongue biting I have had to do makes me feel like... someone who bites their tongue a lot? I do not have a good simile for this
February 13, 2026 at 3:10 AM
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NUDE ELON MUSK: The invisible clothes I'm wearing are a product of xAthleisure, which will roll out self-dressing outfits within two years at the latest

THE CREDULOUS PRESS: Fully Clothed Tesla Innovator Does It Again
February 12, 2026 at 7:10 PM
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never seen a better clapback to "just playing devil's advocate," this made me screech
rather than play advocate, go meet your client in person to be sure you understand their concerns
February 12, 2026 at 7:12 PM
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February 11, 2026 at 10:13 PM
I stole this from my friend’s insta but i think we need to talk about another reason why AI must be stopped and that’s cos it makes it far too easy to do shit like this that should be filed under “could you just not?”
February 11, 2026 at 4:52 AM
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Get in losers we’re gonna live in a library
February 11, 2026 at 1:16 AM
wanna come to a FREE cooking class tonight and learn how to make sauces and beef bulgogi?

It's in Naenae - email eat@wellingtonpride.com to join in
Three spots have opens up in our Queer Cooking Class tonight. Want to joint us? Email eat@wellingtonpride.com now!
Working with funding from Lower Hutt City Council, we’re really excited to be able to start offering FREE cooking classes for our rainbow community. Learn some new skills, make some new friends & eat some great food. Classes start next Wed so sign up now! www.wellingtonpridefestival.com/they-ate
February 11, 2026 at 12:29 AM
this is really good writing (even though it's on substack, boo) querent.substack.com/p/i-would-st... (spoilers for HR)
In Your Arms I Would Start A War
A Heated Rivalry Notebook
querent.substack.com
February 10, 2026 at 8:46 AM
Don’t give Seymour & co any more ideas!
Happy 13th anniversary to this pair of matching news headlines.
February 10, 2026 at 7:55 AM
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Happy 13th anniversary to this pair of matching news headlines.
February 10, 2026 at 7:26 AM
What the fresh heck is going on with traffic right now? My Didi two blocks away is estimated to take another 15 minutes to get here and uber wants $43 for a $9 trip?
February 10, 2026 at 4:21 AM
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Renting in Aotearoa NZ? Please fill in the survey; if nothing else the results will help me with council decision-making!

Own your home? Please share it widely to get max responses.
Aotearoa Renter's Survey 2026
This is about gathering stories and information about what it's like being a renter in Aotearoa in 2026 - to support you, your flatmates and your neighbours to advocate, organise and campaign for dece...
actionstation.typeform.com
February 9, 2026 at 11:37 PM
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[previously in the NYT]
Hart: i've sold AI to to Brockway, Ogdenville and North Haverbrook and by gum it put them on the map
NYT: wow! sounds legit!
Hart: and look! i've got your nose!
NYT: OH MY GAWD
NYT: are you a wizard??
February 9, 2026 at 4:42 PM
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It’s Auckland Pride season! The D*List has curated a list of accessible, joyful events happening throughout February to enjoy. Happy Pride!
An accessible events guide for Auckland Pride 2026
It’s Auckland Pride season! The D*List has curated a list of accessible, joyful events happening throughout February to enjoy. Happy Pride!
thedlist.co.nz
February 9, 2026 at 10:27 PM