Howard Mittelmark
@howardm.bsky.social
Pinned
Howard Mittelmark
@howardm.bsky.social
· Jan 18
Occupant was my father's name. Call me Current Resident.
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
indie bank president
fringe arms dealer
alt Realtor™
fringe arms dealer
alt Realtor™
January 3, 2026 at 4:49 AM
indie bank president
fringe arms dealer
alt Realtor™
fringe arms dealer
alt Realtor™
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
How will "Thou Shalt Not" fare against the Bluesky Code?
January 3, 2026 at 3:39 AM
How will "Thou Shalt Not" fare against the Bluesky Code?
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
All right everyone, we gave it our best shot but all we can do now is hope for better things in 2027.
January 1, 2026 at 5:19 PM
All right everyone, we gave it our best shot but all we can do now is hope for better things in 2027.
There was a disturbing sound during dinner. Discovered that I'd found the limits of Pyrex while cleaning up later. I'd baked some potatoes earlier, but I've been leaving that dish in the oven while cooking for decades. (Observations about the state of the oven otherwise won't be appreciated.)
January 2, 2026 at 11:41 PM
There was a disturbing sound during dinner. Discovered that I'd found the limits of Pyrex while cleaning up later. I'd baked some potatoes earlier, but I've been leaving that dish in the oven while cooking for decades. (Observations about the state of the oven otherwise won't be appreciated.)
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
[packing for work trip]
"Honey, where’s our business ketchup?"
"Honey, where’s our business ketchup?"
January 2, 2026 at 6:21 PM
[packing for work trip]
"Honey, where’s our business ketchup?"
"Honey, where’s our business ketchup?"
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
Do you think God’s underlings were all like, fine, let Him focus on the minor details of designing the ark, whatever, that will at least keep Him busy and out of our way while we deal with this super complicated idea of flooding the whole Earth that He just announced without consulting with us.
January 2, 2026 at 2:11 PM
Do you think God’s underlings were all like, fine, let Him focus on the minor details of designing the ark, whatever, that will at least keep Him busy and out of our way while we deal with this super complicated idea of flooding the whole Earth that He just announced without consulting with us.
A lot of people don't know this, but a Bactrian camel is called a "two-hump" camel because it has always been considered the sexiest camel, and you traditionally want to "hump" it twice.
January 2, 2026 at 2:24 PM
A lot of people don't know this, but a Bactrian camel is called a "two-hump" camel because it has always been considered the sexiest camel, and you traditionally want to "hump" it twice.
First winter since I started using over-the-ear headphones, and I now understand that they also keep your ears warm.
January 1, 2026 at 11:22 PM
First winter since I started using over-the-ear headphones, and I now understand that they also keep your ears warm.
They're saying this as if helping you to relax and fit in were bad reasons to smoke, rather than a bonus.
January 1, 2026 at 6:15 PM
They're saying this as if helping you to relax and fit in were bad reasons to smoke, rather than a bonus.
I'll tell you this: being the guy who always adds comic grace notes to group songs like "Happy Birthday" is not the path to popularity you'd think it would be.
January 1, 2026 at 4:24 PM
I'll tell you this: being the guy who always adds comic grace notes to group songs like "Happy Birthday" is not the path to popularity you'd think it would be.
Fuck this. If I was going to become a better person, I would have become a better person when I was still young enough to have some hope of becoming a better person.
January 1, 2026 at 4:13 PM
Fuck this. If I was going to become a better person, I would have become a better person when I was still young enough to have some hope of becoming a better person.
Came across this, so I did a search and found that.
January 1, 2026 at 4:00 PM
Came across this, so I did a search and found that.
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
Seven years ago I said this was the way to do it and no one listened. Now I’m thinking ahead about taking matters into my own hands
January 1, 2026 at 3:37 AM
Seven years ago I said this was the way to do it and no one listened. Now I’m thinking ahead about taking matters into my own hands
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
Faced With Taxes, Billionaires Bump Into Each Other Fleeing Every State In The US For Other States Where They Have A Home
December 31, 2025 at 6:52 PM
Faced With Taxes, Billionaires Bump Into Each Other Fleeing Every State In The US For Other States Where They Have A Home
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
pound for pound this might be the funniest thing ever written
December 31, 2025 at 6:15 PM
pound for pound this might be the funniest thing ever written
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
This year, instead of posting a list of all the books I read in 2025, I'm going to be posting a list of all the books I didn't read in 2025, as soon as I finish it.
December 31, 2025 at 6:26 PM
This year, instead of posting a list of all the books I read in 2025, I'm going to be posting a list of all the books I didn't read in 2025, as soon as I finish it.
I remember how when I'd ask my mother if this was going to be the year she took off my hobbles, she'd say, "Good things come to those who wait..." and then she'd stop until I said the rest with her: "...but not to those who masturbate."
December 31, 2025 at 6:19 PM
I remember how when I'd ask my mother if this was going to be the year she took off my hobbles, she'd say, "Good things come to those who wait..." and then she'd stop until I said the rest with her: "...but not to those who masturbate."
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
Excellent stuff. Read.
As it happens, I have experience with high-level government demands to stop an explosive, accurate story from running, and I also have experience with 60 Minutes spiking a story I was involved in, so I have thoughts about the travesty at CBS. If you want some journalism anecdotes, here are a lot:
Watching Bari Weiss Murder Investigative Journalism at CBS
Notes from someone who's withstood White House demands to stop an explosive story—and who once even had a 60 Minutes piece spiked
www.forever-wars.com
December 30, 2025 at 8:48 PM
Excellent stuff. Read.
Reposted by Howard Mittelmark
There's only one true calculighter
December 30, 2025 at 6:51 PM
There's only one true calculighter
If this book had existed fifty years ago, there'd also be a collection of short stories published in the 80s called Small Bodies of Arbitrary Shapes, about aimless, alienated young people wandering through an uncaring modern landscape, probably Vintage Contemporaries, possibly second person.
December 30, 2025 at 4:43 AM
If this book had existed fifty years ago, there'd also be a collection of short stories published in the 80s called Small Bodies of Arbitrary Shapes, about aimless, alienated young people wandering through an uncaring modern landscape, probably Vintage Contemporaries, possibly second person.