The Dependent Clause
@dependentclause.bsky.social
Jake (he/him) • mpls
I just want to play my drums
https://thedependentclause.bandcamp.com/album/cancelled-plans
I just want to play my drums
https://thedependentclause.bandcamp.com/album/cancelled-plans
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"This woke Me-Too bullshit has gone too far," said the former Harvard President and Secretary of the U.S. Treasury to the billionaire pedophile sex trafficker in a private email that the Justice Department under both parties kept secret for years
November 13, 2025 at 1:46 AM
"This woke Me-Too bullshit has gone too far," said the former Harvard President and Secretary of the U.S. Treasury to the billionaire pedophile sex trafficker in a private email that the Justice Department under both parties kept secret for years
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epstein in dozens of pieces of written documentation: the presidential candidate my best friend loves coming over to my house for the young girls i rent
reporters: we are getting closer to busting this thing wide open
reporters: we are getting closer to busting this thing wide open
November 13, 2025 at 3:05 AM
epstein in dozens of pieces of written documentation: the presidential candidate my best friend loves coming over to my house for the young girls i rent
reporters: we are getting closer to busting this thing wide open
reporters: we are getting closer to busting this thing wide open
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When Twin Cities DSA members voted to endorse @OmarFatehMN.com for mayor, we knew the task before us would be hard. Landlords, Wall Street developers & corporations like Lyft poured millions of dollars into this election to spread racist, Islamophobic lies to protect their profits.
November 12, 2025 at 7:30 PM
When Twin Cities DSA members voted to endorse @OmarFatehMN.com for mayor, we knew the task before us would be hard. Landlords, Wall Street developers & corporations like Lyft poured millions of dollars into this election to spread racist, Islamophobic lies to protect their profits.
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i would imagine it’s because he was one of the worst Democratic presidents of all time
why the fuck didn’t any of this stuff come out when Biden was president
A direct email exchange from 2011 between Jeffrey Epstein and Ghislaine Maxwell, just released by House Oversight Committee Democrats.
November 12, 2025 at 6:34 PM
i would imagine it’s because he was one of the worst Democratic presidents of all time
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The "first as tragedy, then as farce" distinction collapsed into itself a while ago so of course the most notorious sex trafficker in history typed like da share Z0ne
November 12, 2025 at 6:42 PM
The "first as tragedy, then as farce" distinction collapsed into itself a while ago so of course the most notorious sex trafficker in history typed like da share Z0ne
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Seen a few of the epstein emails now, all with different people and it's not the main issue here but is everyone illiterate
November 12, 2025 at 5:54 PM
Seen a few of the epstein emails now, all with different people and it's not the main issue here but is everyone illiterate
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I genuinely believe this is a huge part of the LLM worship; half of these people are functionally illiterate
Putting aside all the horrible shit in them: I cannot believe the global elite composes emails like fucking horses who somehow learned to crudely type. My emails read like Shakespeare compared to the lowercased, unpunctuated screeds written to the worlds biggest pedophile. Fucking write like adults!
November 12, 2025 at 6:40 PM
I genuinely believe this is a huge part of the LLM worship; half of these people are functionally illiterate
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Putting aside all the horrible shit in them: I cannot believe the global elite composes emails like fucking horses who somehow learned to crudely type. My emails read like Shakespeare compared to the lowercased, unpunctuated screeds written to the worlds biggest pedophile. Fucking write like adults!
November 12, 2025 at 6:21 PM
Putting aside all the horrible shit in them: I cannot believe the global elite composes emails like fucking horses who somehow learned to crudely type. My emails read like Shakespeare compared to the lowercased, unpunctuated screeds written to the worlds biggest pedophile. Fucking write like adults!
Tonight was a good test run for when It Happens
November 12, 2025 at 4:01 AM
Tonight was a good test run for when It Happens
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when new yorkers all experience something on social media it's like a rat that got ahold of a brazil nut. when upper midwesterners all experience something on social media it's a breathtaking dance of radiant light and color across the entire night sky
November 12, 2025 at 3:35 AM
when new yorkers all experience something on social media it's like a rat that got ahold of a brazil nut. when upper midwesterners all experience something on social media it's a breathtaking dance of radiant light and color across the entire night sky
We can have this, as a treat
In my alley, surrounded by light pollution, but still
November 12, 2025 at 2:47 AM
We can have this, as a treat
In my alley, surrounded by light pollution, but still
November 12, 2025 at 2:39 AM
In my alley, surrounded by light pollution, but still
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the cosmic ballet continues
CNN: Was the shutdown worth it?
HAKEEM JEFFRIES: We have waged a battle on behalf of the American people.
CNN: But you didn't get what you want.
JEFFRIES: At the end of the day, the fight lives on.
HAKEEM JEFFRIES: We have waged a battle on behalf of the American people.
CNN: But you didn't get what you want.
JEFFRIES: At the end of the day, the fight lives on.
November 11, 2025 at 6:31 AM
the cosmic ballet continues
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If I see another “you didn’t vote hard enough and now here we are” post I am going to become the joker
November 10, 2025 at 10:47 PM
If I see another “you didn’t vote hard enough and now here we are” post I am going to become the joker
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Where I’m from we call this “being an alcoholic”
This is far and away my pettiest Tim Kaine gripe but the Senator’s advance staff always deliver a bottle of Maker’s Mark that is for him only to fundraising events so he doesn’t have to do toasts with the cheap beer and wine the hosts provide and that always really irked me
November 10, 2025 at 6:49 PM
Where I’m from we call this “being an alcoholic”
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David Byrne As Photographed by David LaChapelle Will Fix You. David Byrne Photographed by David LaChapelle for the New Yorker Will Solve Your Problems www.newyorker.com/magazine/202...
November 10, 2025 at 4:07 PM
David Byrne As Photographed by David LaChapelle Will Fix You. David Byrne Photographed by David LaChapelle for the New Yorker Will Solve Your Problems www.newyorker.com/magazine/202...
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When Did Yelling "Someone's In Here" From Inside the Bathroom Stall Become So Performative
November 10, 2025 at 4:23 PM
When Did Yelling "Someone's In Here" From Inside the Bathroom Stall Become So Performative
ATTN: anyone attempting to do 12D chess analysis of RCV and the Mpls mayoral race open.substack.com/pub/howthing...
Do What You Believe In
How to navigate a complex political world.
open.substack.com
November 10, 2025 at 6:36 PM
ATTN: anyone attempting to do 12D chess analysis of RCV and the Mpls mayoral race open.substack.com/pub/howthing...
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gonna hit myself in the head with a hammer so i can better understand how the median voter might be thinking about this
November 10, 2025 at 6:09 AM
gonna hit myself in the head with a hammer so i can better understand how the median voter might be thinking about this
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Kyle Kingsbury is not a journalist. He is not an op-ed writer.
He is a computer safety researcher.
And he has written one of the most compelling, comprehensive accounts of the ongoing hell in Chicago that you could possibly imagine.
In under 1600 words.
aphyr.com/posts/397-i-...
He is a computer safety researcher.
And he has written one of the most compelling, comprehensive accounts of the ongoing hell in Chicago that you could possibly imagine.
In under 1600 words.
aphyr.com/posts/397-i-...
November 9, 2025 at 8:49 PM
Kyle Kingsbury is not a journalist. He is not an op-ed writer.
He is a computer safety researcher.
And he has written one of the most compelling, comprehensive accounts of the ongoing hell in Chicago that you could possibly imagine.
In under 1600 words.
aphyr.com/posts/397-i-...
He is a computer safety researcher.
And he has written one of the most compelling, comprehensive accounts of the ongoing hell in Chicago that you could possibly imagine.
In under 1600 words.
aphyr.com/posts/397-i-...
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So many people seem to be misunderstanding how human beings vote. We’re not automatons. We’re motivated by emotion, connection, and our own goals. Assuming everyone will line up behind you because you think you have some perfect analysis is never going to be a realistic outcome.
November 9, 2025 at 5:28 PM
So many people seem to be misunderstanding how human beings vote. We’re not automatons. We’re motivated by emotion, connection, and our own goals. Assuming everyone will line up behind you because you think you have some perfect analysis is never going to be a realistic outcome.
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imo democrats biggest perception problem is not actually any specific policy but the fact that they, as a whole, read as inauthentic panderers and cowards. the fact that they are unwilling to take a risk or advocate for any position with <50% approval in a poll is so unlikable!
November 9, 2025 at 9:05 PM
imo democrats biggest perception problem is not actually any specific policy but the fact that they, as a whole, read as inauthentic panderers and cowards. the fact that they are unwilling to take a risk or advocate for any position with <50% approval in a poll is so unlikable!
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If this is your attitude about union members working as teachers, janitors and hotel worker, you’re more than welcome to get a job in the industry and tell your coworkers they’re idiots.
I spent years working in hotels. My coworkers were brilliant, politically savvy and understood political power.
I spent years working in hotels. My coworkers were brilliant, politically savvy and understood political power.
Fuck their people, they need to teach people how to win, not how to feel good and smug
November 9, 2025 at 5:13 PM
If this is your attitude about union members working as teachers, janitors and hotel worker, you’re more than welcome to get a job in the industry and tell your coworkers they’re idiots.
I spent years working in hotels. My coworkers were brilliant, politically savvy and understood political power.
I spent years working in hotels. My coworkers were brilliant, politically savvy and understood political power.
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Nice shirt. For a clown to wear. To the toilet store
October 16, 2025 at 2:30 PM
Nice shirt. For a clown to wear. To the toilet store