Michael Baumann
@baumann.bsky.social
FanGraphs Writer, Piney, Gamecock, Condiment Enthusiast, Connoisseur of Vehicles
Subscribe to Wheelysports.kit.com (or medium.com/@wheelysports)
@michaelbaumann on Twitter
baumannwrites at gmail dot com
Subscribe to Wheelysports.kit.com (or medium.com/@wheelysports)
@michaelbaumann on Twitter
baumannwrites at gmail dot com
Reposted by Michael Baumann
*hits blunt harder*
Baseball= turn based
Football = turn based
Soccer= real time
Hockey = real time
Basketball = real time
Baseball= turn based
Football = turn based
Soccer= real time
Hockey = real time
Basketball = real time
*hits blunt*
bowling and curling are the same game just with two different battle systems
curling = turn based
bowling = real time
bowling and curling are the same game just with two different battle systems
curling = turn based
bowling = real time
February 9, 2026 at 11:48 PM
*hits blunt harder*
Baseball= turn based
Football = turn based
Soccer= real time
Hockey = real time
Basketball = real time
Baseball= turn based
Football = turn based
Soccer= real time
Hockey = real time
Basketball = real time
Reposted by Michael Baumann
[last week] i don't know the names of any curlers but i'll probably have it on in the background while i do other stuff
[today] IF CORY AND KOREY WIN GOLD WE ARE GOING TO CHILI'S TO CELEBRATE
[today] IF CORY AND KOREY WIN GOLD WE ARE GOING TO CHILI'S TO CELEBRATE
Cory Thiesse and Korey Dropkin have done it‼️
Team USA knocks out Italy and advances to the mixed doubles curling gold-medal final against Sweden.
Team USA knocks out Italy and advances to the mixed doubles curling gold-medal final against Sweden.
February 9, 2026 at 7:21 PM
[last week] i don't know the names of any curlers but i'll probably have it on in the background while i do other stuff
[today] IF CORY AND KOREY WIN GOLD WE ARE GOING TO CHILI'S TO CELEBRATE
[today] IF CORY AND KOREY WIN GOLD WE ARE GOING TO CHILI'S TO CELEBRATE
Reposted by Michael Baumann
Post a banger that isn't in English
February 9, 2026 at 7:23 PM
Post a banger that isn't in English
Reposted by Michael Baumann
As good an opportunity as I'll ever have to post this video of Nate McLouth (born and raised in Muskegon, Michigan) showcasing some of the best Dominican Spanish you will ever hear in your life.
February 9, 2026 at 6:12 PM
As good an opportunity as I'll ever have to post this video of Nate McLouth (born and raised in Muskegon, Michigan) showcasing some of the best Dominican Spanish you will ever hear in your life.
I don't like that trade it's looking at me weird
February 9, 2026 at 2:40 PM
I don't like that trade it's looking at me weird
They moved an entire farm and a power station onto the field in five minutes and the Pats can't move a football 10 yards
Genuinely incredible how quickly they can roll all this out in the middle of a football game
February 9, 2026 at 1:32 AM
They moved an entire farm and a power station onto the field in five minutes and the Pats can't move a football 10 yards
Lady Gaga appearing here is risking some "actually Italians aren't white after all" backlash
February 9, 2026 at 1:28 AM
Lady Gaga appearing here is risking some "actually Italians aren't white after all" backlash
Go Birds
One more clean half and night night
February 9, 2026 at 1:14 AM
Go Birds
Reposted by Michael Baumann
this is what a guardians/brewers world series would be like
February 9, 2026 at 12:49 AM
this is what a guardians/brewers world series would be like
A commercial that's all butts punctuated by a pun is the best short film of 2026. Both the major food groups
February 9, 2026 at 12:37 AM
A commercial that's all butts punctuated by a pun is the best short film of 2026. Both the major food groups
Reposted by Michael Baumann
Whenever the Dodgers sign a free agent
Are there sports guys on here who adopt the annoying too-savvy doomerism of politics guys? Saying stuff like "You really think there's going to be a second half"
if you see someone posting "I CANT BELIEVE IT, HOLY SHIT" or "THIS IS UN-FUCKING REAL" later this afternoon know with confidence it's either someone watching "the big game" or more evidence of elite wrongdoing uncovered in the unending global pedophile trafficking scandal
February 8, 2026 at 9:45 PM
Whenever the Dodgers sign a free agent
Guy who hasn't really been paying attention since he woke up from a 15-year coma yesterday but is really looking forward to hearing "My Backwards Walk" performed at the Super Bowl halftime show
February 8, 2026 at 9:15 PM
Guy who hasn't really been paying attention since he woke up from a 15-year coma yesterday but is really looking forward to hearing "My Backwards Walk" performed at the Super Bowl halftime show
Not ashamed to admit I got up and yelled
Here's the Dropkin shot that knocked all three of Sweden's stones out and the final shot for Sweden... No sound (don't make me get into it)
February 8, 2026 at 8:04 PM
Not ashamed to admit I got up and yelled
Mine is Frank Rijkaard's coaching accomplishments are more impressive than Pep Guardiola's
it's important as a sports fan to hold some demonstrably false beliefs, and one of mine is that Jaylen Brown is bad. i don't mean "not an all-star." i mean not good enough to play professional basketball
February 8, 2026 at 7:36 PM
Mine is Frank Rijkaard's coaching accomplishments are more impressive than Pep Guardiola's
Reposted by Michael Baumann
i bought the fangraphs womens zip up and its sooooo comfortable and cozy. and more importantly i will finally get to go to games and represent my sports fan allegiance to team spreadsheets
February 8, 2026 at 5:30 PM
i bought the fangraphs womens zip up and its sooooo comfortable and cozy. and more importantly i will finally get to go to games and represent my sports fan allegiance to team spreadsheets
Man can't travel internationally because his farts violate treaties on the proliferation of biological and chemical weapons
RFK Jr on what he'll eat during the Super Bowl: "I am on a carnivore diet so I just eat meat and ferments, and I'm very happy with that. So I'm probably going to have yogurt."
February 8, 2026 at 4:54 PM
Man can't travel internationally because his farts violate treaties on the proliferation of biological and chemical weapons
Reposted by Michael Baumann
Akani Simbine finished 4th or 5th in the 100m at the 2016 Olympics, 2017 Worlds, 2019 Worlds, 2020 Olympics, and 2022 Worlds, and 2024 Olympics. finally got a silver in the 4x100 in Paris though
February 8, 2026 at 3:39 PM
Akani Simbine finished 4th or 5th in the 100m at the 2016 Olympics, 2017 Worlds, 2019 Worlds, 2020 Olympics, and 2022 Worlds, and 2024 Olympics. finally got a silver in the 4x100 in Paris though
One of the random athletes I think about most is an Italian swimmer named Alessio Boggiatto, who qualified for exactly one event at three straight Olympics and finished fourth all three times, the last two times behind Michael Phelps
I want to think I could handle a silver medal, losing by a hundredth of a second.
Absolutely not, if it was fourth-place-off-the-podium by the same margin. Absolute scenes inside my head 😮💨
Absolutely not, if it was fourth-place-off-the-podium by the same margin. Absolute scenes inside my head 😮💨
February 8, 2026 at 3:18 PM
One of the random athletes I think about most is an Italian swimmer named Alessio Boggiatto, who qualified for exactly one event at three straight Olympics and finished fourth all three times, the last two times behind Michael Phelps
I don't know how Olympic athletes have the mental strength to work hard enough to compete, then cope with losing by hundredths of a second. I'd be on the podium accepting my silver medal in a straitjacket
February 8, 2026 at 3:03 PM
I don't know how Olympic athletes have the mental strength to work hard enough to compete, then cope with losing by hundredths of a second. I'd be on the podium accepting my silver medal in a straitjacket
Reposted by Michael Baumann
I sometimes wonder what the world would look like if a generation of tech, science, and business reporters hadn't decided that the press release was the news
February 8, 2026 at 1:23 AM
I sometimes wonder what the world would look like if a generation of tech, science, and business reporters hadn't decided that the press release was the news
Glad this guy is going away before I could differentiate his name from the QB who eats banana peels and puts mayo in his coffee
Breaking — Will Lewis out at the Washington Post. He just sent this email to staff (shared with me by staffer):
February 8, 2026 at 1:04 AM
Glad this guy is going away before I could differentiate his name from the QB who eats banana peels and puts mayo in his coffee
The home run derby being better than the dunk contest is the most unlikely development of the past decade. Including all the other stuff
February 7, 2026 at 5:31 PM
The home run derby being better than the dunk contest is the most unlikely development of the past decade. Including all the other stuff
Reposted by Michael Baumann
so, I declined a temporary gig covering The Olympics for a Big Media Company bc I wouldn't have been able to do the newsletter.
I was hoping to get enough paid subs over the 2 Olympic weeks to make up for it.
friends... you hit the number ***BEFORE THE OPENING CEREMONY***
can't thank you enough
I was hoping to get enough paid subs over the 2 Olympic weeks to make up for it.
friends... you hit the number ***BEFORE THE OPENING CEREMONY***
can't thank you enough
OLYMPICS NEWSLETTER, DAY 1
⛷️ HOW IS LINDSEY VONN REAL⛷️
🍆 THE SKI JUMPING PENIS SCANDAL🍆
🥌👶 CURLING BABY👶🥌
🇺🇸 UPDATES ON USA CURLING AND FIGURE SKATING 🇺🇸
AND MORE!!!!!
sports.beehiiv.com/p/olympics-d...
⛷️ HOW IS LINDSEY VONN REAL⛷️
🍆 THE SKI JUMPING PENIS SCANDAL🍆
🥌👶 CURLING BABY👶🥌
🇺🇸 UPDATES ON USA CURLING AND FIGURE SKATING 🇺🇸
AND MORE!!!!!
sports.beehiiv.com/p/olympics-d...
February 7, 2026 at 4:06 PM
so, I declined a temporary gig covering The Olympics for a Big Media Company bc I wouldn't have been able to do the newsletter.
I was hoping to get enough paid subs over the 2 Olympic weeks to make up for it.
friends... you hit the number ***BEFORE THE OPENING CEREMONY***
can't thank you enough
I was hoping to get enough paid subs over the 2 Olympic weeks to make up for it.
friends... you hit the number ***BEFORE THE OPENING CEREMONY***
can't thank you enough