eben (0% beer drinker)
@automax.bsky.social
hi i’m Eben; a wife-guy; i’m here to put my special touch on things
‘First as awkwardness* then as epilepsy’
*major depressive disorder
‘First as awkwardness* then as epilepsy’
*major depressive disorder
Pinned
(guy interviewing me for the job): Says here on your resume, “savant”…
(me): (nodding)
(guy): That’s all it says
(me): (nodding)
(guy): That’s all it says
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
u shouldnt have to facilitate all that gurl
January 30, 2026 at 11:50 PM
u shouldnt have to facilitate all that gurl
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
ELON MUSK: your island is so freaking like, based. it's seriously like effing amazeballs. i'm going to basically be making like all of mars totally just like the same as how epic this is
STEPHEN HAWKING: jeff rey why, did you in vite, this lame, ass nerd
STEPHEN HAWKING: jeff rey why, did you in vite, this lame, ass nerd
January 30, 2026 at 11:37 PM
ELON MUSK: your island is so freaking like, based. it's seriously like effing amazeballs. i'm going to basically be making like all of mars totally just like the same as how epic this is
STEPHEN HAWKING: jeff rey why, did you in vite, this lame, ass nerd
STEPHEN HAWKING: jeff rey why, did you in vite, this lame, ass nerd
john ganz and catherine liu have a secret child together
January 30, 2026 at 11:42 PM
john ganz and catherine liu have a secret child together
“Quick!! We need you to try to drive this fire engine!!”
(preheats vape pen for a looooong haul)
(preheats vape pen for a looooong haul)
January 30, 2026 at 11:41 PM
“Quick!! We need you to try to drive this fire engine!!”
(preheats vape pen for a looooong haul)
(preheats vape pen for a looooong haul)
sir what if we try chumming the water with Elon…
January 30, 2026 at 11:33 PM
sir what if we try chumming the water with Elon…
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
Everybody who perpetrated this while covering it up should be in the Hague
www.reuters.com/world/early-...
www.reuters.com/world/early-...
January 30, 2026 at 8:40 PM
Everybody who perpetrated this while covering it up should be in the Hague
www.reuters.com/world/early-...
www.reuters.com/world/early-...
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
NEW: Enormous anti-ICE, anti-Trump protest happening in Baltimore right now.
Crowd stretching back over the horizon.
(🎥 PSL Baltimore)
Crowd stretching back over the horizon.
(🎥 PSL Baltimore)
January 30, 2026 at 8:57 PM
NEW: Enormous anti-ICE, anti-Trump protest happening in Baltimore right now.
Crowd stretching back over the horizon.
(🎥 PSL Baltimore)
Crowd stretching back over the horizon.
(🎥 PSL Baltimore)
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
Garfield reading from Quotations from Chairman Mao
January 29, 2026 at 10:52 PM
Garfield reading from Quotations from Chairman Mao
(A bunch of Bostonians, right before leaving to go protest ICE):
“I have to go see about a girl”
“I have to go see about a girl”
No hate
No fear
Immigrants are welcome here
#Boston showing up in the bitter cold to show solidarity with Minnesota against authoritarians and secret police. #AlexPretti #ReneeGood #Minneapolis
No fear
Immigrants are welcome here
#Boston showing up in the bitter cold to show solidarity with Minnesota against authoritarians and secret police. #AlexPretti #ReneeGood #Minneapolis
January 30, 2026 at 8:56 PM
(A bunch of Bostonians, right before leaving to go protest ICE):
“I have to go see about a girl”
“I have to go see about a girl”
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
‼️‼️Jan 29 Fathi update:
✅💌 With an 81lb pregnant wife who is critically malnourished at home, Fathi has had another account deleted by the online arm of the
"most moral army in the world", Bluesky.
These are real people.
Help them be seen
- Nicola
gofund.me/4f9407199
✅ Molly Shah
#SaveFathi
✅💌 With an 81lb pregnant wife who is critically malnourished at home, Fathi has had another account deleted by the online arm of the
"most moral army in the world", Bluesky.
These are real people.
Help them be seen
- Nicola
gofund.me/4f9407199
✅ Molly Shah
#SaveFathi
January 30, 2026 at 8:29 PM
‼️‼️Jan 29 Fathi update:
✅💌 With an 81lb pregnant wife who is critically malnourished at home, Fathi has had another account deleted by the online arm of the
"most moral army in the world", Bluesky.
These are real people.
Help them be seen
- Nicola
gofund.me/4f9407199
✅ Molly Shah
#SaveFathi
✅💌 With an 81lb pregnant wife who is critically malnourished at home, Fathi has had another account deleted by the online arm of the
"most moral army in the world", Bluesky.
These are real people.
Help them be seen
- Nicola
gofund.me/4f9407199
✅ Molly Shah
#SaveFathi
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
My son has a severe case of COVID-19. His small body can't handle it; he has a high fever, vomits everything he eats, his body aches, he's lost a lot of weight, and he's unable to walk, breathe, or move. Please donate to buy him medicine and cover his hospital expenses.
😭😭💔💔
gofund.me/7fc0e346
😭😭💔💔
gofund.me/7fc0e346
January 25, 2026 at 7:32 PM
My son has a severe case of COVID-19. His small body can't handle it; he has a high fever, vomits everything he eats, his body aches, he's lost a lot of weight, and he's unable to walk, breathe, or move. Please donate to buy him medicine and cover his hospital expenses.
😭😭💔💔
gofund.me/7fc0e346
😭😭💔💔
gofund.me/7fc0e346
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
I’ve launched a Citation Needed membership drive to celebrate publishing my 100th recap issue!
Citation Needed critically covers cryptocurrency, the crypto industry, and its influence on policy. Paid subscriptions support much more than just the newsletter — here’s what goes into this work:
Citation Needed critically covers cryptocurrency, the crypto industry, and its influence on policy. Paid subscriptions support much more than just the newsletter — here’s what goes into this work:
Citation Needed membership drive
Celebrating 100 recap issues and sustaining critical independent coverage.
www.citationneeded.news
January 30, 2026 at 8:15 PM
I’ve launched a Citation Needed membership drive to celebrate publishing my 100th recap issue!
Citation Needed critically covers cryptocurrency, the crypto industry, and its influence on policy. Paid subscriptions support much more than just the newsletter — here’s what goes into this work:
Citation Needed critically covers cryptocurrency, the crypto industry, and its influence on policy. Paid subscriptions support much more than just the newsletter — here’s what goes into this work:
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
Can’t believe they released the Epstein files to cover up for the Melania movie.
January 30, 2026 at 7:47 PM
Can’t believe they released the Epstein files to cover up for the Melania movie.
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
Anyone who has seen Con Air knows the DEA is the most corrupt and unprofessional of all of the federal law enforcement organizations.
January 30, 2026 at 8:28 PM
Anyone who has seen Con Air knows the DEA is the most corrupt and unprofessional of all of the federal law enforcement organizations.
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
art by Boris Vallejo
March 5, 2025 at 9:46 PM
art by Boris Vallejo
once again begging people to read Klaus Theweleit
January 30, 2026 at 8:13 PM
once again begging people to read Klaus Theweleit
Probably nothing
this is a guy tony blair fired and rehired like three times. then starmer hired him.
he's always been evil. he's been known to be evil since the early 90s. yet the labour party kept him and even made him a lord.
he's the architect of the modern labour party.
he's always been evil. he's been known to be evil since the early 90s. yet the labour party kept him and even made him a lord.
he's the architect of the modern labour party.
Jeffrey Epstein sent money to Mandelson’s husband after prison release, emails reveal
January 30, 2026 at 7:41 PM
Probably nothing
If you got paid this week, pls put a piece of it here if you can
January 30, 2026 at 7:40 PM
If you got paid this week, pls put a piece of it here if you can
the virgin jeffrey Epstein vs the Chad Luigi mangione
January 30, 2026 at 7:38 PM
the virgin jeffrey Epstein vs the Chad Luigi mangione
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
democrats be like
Slop of compromise - OSRS Wiki
The slop of compromise is used in Recipe for Disaster to free General Bentnoze and General Wartface. It is obtained by taking soggy bread, dyed orange, and spicy maggots to the Goblin Cook in the Gobl...
oldschool.runescape.wiki
January 30, 2026 at 5:11 PM
democrats be like
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
John Candy and Catherine O'Hara made the world a better place.
Canada and the world is a better place for them having existed.
Canada and the world is a better place for them having existed.
January 30, 2026 at 7:21 PM
John Candy and Catherine O'Hara made the world a better place.
Canada and the world is a better place for them having existed.
Canada and the world is a better place for them having existed.
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
erm what the frick
January 30, 2026 at 7:30 PM
erm what the frick
Reposted by eben (0% beer drinker)
JOE BIDEN: "No administration has helped Israel more than I have. None...None...None..."
Democrats refuse to listen to their base. Instead they capitulate to conservatives and the genocidal fascist Israeli government even when the ICC had an arrest warrant out for Netanyahu.
Democrats refuse to listen to their base. Instead they capitulate to conservatives and the genocidal fascist Israeli government even when the ICC had an arrest warrant out for Netanyahu.
January 29, 2026 at 5:57 PM
JOE BIDEN: "No administration has helped Israel more than I have. None...None...None..."
Democrats refuse to listen to their base. Instead they capitulate to conservatives and the genocidal fascist Israeli government even when the ICC had an arrest warrant out for Netanyahu.
Democrats refuse to listen to their base. Instead they capitulate to conservatives and the genocidal fascist Israeli government even when the ICC had an arrest warrant out for Netanyahu.
lmao yesssss
This is funny as shit
This is funny as shit
Video game stocks are suddenly crashing today with the launch of Google's Project Genie as investors think games will start magically getting made with AI
➡️ ca.investing.com/news/stock-m...
#GoogleGemini #TakeTwo #CDProjektRED #Roblox #videogames
➡️ ca.investing.com/news/stock-m...
#GoogleGemini #TakeTwo #CDProjektRED #Roblox #videogames
January 30, 2026 at 7:16 PM
lmao yesssss
This is funny as shit
This is funny as shit
(me, to my wife): you are the wind beneath my wings 😍
(my wife): idk i’m having trouble steering you
(my wife): idk i’m having trouble steering you
January 30, 2026 at 6:08 PM
(me, to my wife): you are the wind beneath my wings 😍
(my wife): idk i’m having trouble steering you
(my wife): idk i’m having trouble steering you