St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
@simeonthefool.bsky.social
Patron saint of holy fools! And puppeteers. Sillier than thou. Pitied by Mr. T.
Everything is Chaos Theology. What is Chaos Theology?, you may well ask. Well, it’s kind of like that thing when you live tweet the Oscars every other week.
Everything is Chaos Theology. What is Chaos Theology?, you may well ask. Well, it’s kind of like that thing when you live tweet the Oscars every other week.
Pinned
Pumpkin Spice Epistle To The Colossians
Meet my new bot, @pumpkinspicenoun.bsky.social, which takes every noun in the English language (119,000 nouns, per WordNet, including proper and compound nouns).... and makes it Pumpkin Spice!
Because, well why not, that's why!
bsky.app/profile/pump...
Because, well why not, that's why!
bsky.app/profile/pump...
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Ya don't judge a genius by his lab coat.
November 17, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Ya don't judge a genius by his lab coat.
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
![Steve Hogarty @misterbrilliant
[gets olympic tickets to 100m butterfly] Oh my god this will be great. [sees the huge stadium] Oh wow that must be where they keep it.](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:k5zurjvwdwxqwpvd4ggk3w76/bafkreihzgag5tcnviy6ohpnaokdl6jbyus6lufcrxk27xbskrzjusvybxu@jpeg)
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Armageddon!
Armageddon who?
Armageddon pretty tired of all these end times jokes!
Who’s there?
Armageddon!
Armageddon who?
Armageddon pretty tired of all these end times jokes!
November 16, 2025 at 4:20 PM
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Armageddon!
Armageddon who?
Armageddon pretty tired of all these end times jokes!
Who’s there?
Armageddon!
Armageddon who?
Armageddon pretty tired of all these end times jokes!
OCTOBER SURPRISE!
November 16, 2025 at 2:43 PM
OCTOBER SURPRISE!
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
no one:
me: i bet shrek shops at krogre.
me: i bet shrek shops at krogre.
November 15, 2025 at 9:00 PM
no one:
me: i bet shrek shops at krogre.
me: i bet shrek shops at krogre.
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
I hope my made up words don't make you.....discomfortable
November 15, 2025 at 11:58 PM
I hope my made up words don't make you.....discomfortable
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Pumpkin Spice Dung Beetle
November 16, 2025 at 4:41 AM
Pumpkin Spice Dung Beetle
That’s when Jon noticed: everybody else on the bus was a zombie! By mistake, he had gotten on…… the Zombus.
November 16, 2025 at 3:14 AM
That’s when Jon noticed: everybody else on the bus was a zombie! By mistake, he had gotten on…… the Zombus.
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
pony: is this your card?
me: yes! cool trick!
pony: thanks
me: can you do any others?
pony: *sighs* no
me: yes! cool trick!
pony: thanks
me: can you do any others?
pony: *sighs* no
November 16, 2025 at 2:13 AM
pony: is this your card?
me: yes! cool trick!
pony: thanks
me: can you do any others?
pony: *sighs* no
me: yes! cool trick!
pony: thanks
me: can you do any others?
pony: *sighs* no
“I never thought leopards would eat MY face,” sobs woman who voted for the Leopards Eating All People’s Faces Yes To Be Clear We Did Say All People’s Faces Specifically Including Your Own Face No Exceptions Party
November 16, 2025 at 1:17 AM
“I never thought leopards would eat MY face,” sobs woman who voted for the Leopards Eating All People’s Faces Yes To Be Clear We Did Say All People’s Faces Specifically Including Your Own Face No Exceptions Party
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
You don't have a soul. You *are* a soul. You *have* three raccoons in a trench coat with a lifelike rubber mask of your face and recordings of your voice on a mini cassette player.
September 16, 2023 at 5:53 PM
You don't have a soul. You *are* a soul. You *have* three raccoons in a trench coat with a lifelike rubber mask of your face and recordings of your voice on a mini cassette player.
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store
November 15, 2025 at 9:54 PM
Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store
Ah yes the three genders
November 16, 2025 at 12:09 AM
Ah yes the three genders
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Ads on my seeing stone now. What exactly am I paying the wizards guild 8 shillings a month for?
March 12, 2025 at 10:33 AM
Ads on my seeing stone now. What exactly am I paying the wizards guild 8 shillings a month for?
how to yell
how to yell at a horse
what to yell at a horse when it gets in your house
how to get a horse out from behind your curtains
how to clean horse hoof prints out of your rug
where to put bag of horse droppings
how to tell a horse to go back home
why aren’t google results working
how to yell at a horse
what to yell at a horse when it gets in your house
how to get a horse out from behind your curtains
how to clean horse hoof prints out of your rug
where to put bag of horse droppings
how to tell a horse to go back home
why aren’t google results working
November 15, 2025 at 9:33 PM
how to yell
how to yell at a horse
what to yell at a horse when it gets in your house
how to get a horse out from behind your curtains
how to clean horse hoof prints out of your rug
where to put bag of horse droppings
how to tell a horse to go back home
why aren’t google results working
how to yell at a horse
what to yell at a horse when it gets in your house
how to get a horse out from behind your curtains
how to clean horse hoof prints out of your rug
where to put bag of horse droppings
how to tell a horse to go back home
why aren’t google results working
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
it may sound primitive and unscientific, but through the fairies, we could ask mothra for help
November 15, 2025 at 4:37 PM
it may sound primitive and unscientific, but through the fairies, we could ask mothra for help
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Finding A Talking Snowman (1934): An introverted country music star begins to suspect her CD is really Mary and Joseph under an enchantment.
November 15, 2025 at 2:41 PM
Finding A Talking Snowman (1934): An introverted country music star begins to suspect her CD is really Mary and Joseph under an enchantment.
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Happy Partially Muscled Skeleton Day to all who celebrate. Be sure to let all your screams out and then disappear.
November 14, 2025 at 11:28 AM
Happy Partially Muscled Skeleton Day to all who celebrate. Be sure to let all your screams out and then disappear.
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Scooby-Doo Pikachu
🤝
- Communicates by saying his own name
- Favorite food is special candies named after him
- Defeats his opponents by weakening them enough so they can be captured
- Inexplicably has a gig as a detective who helps kids solve crimes
🤝
- Communicates by saying his own name
- Favorite food is special candies named after him
- Defeats his opponents by weakening them enough so they can be captured
- Inexplicably has a gig as a detective who helps kids solve crimes
Scooby-Doo is a Pokémon
November 3, 2025 at 3:33 PM
Scooby-Doo Pikachu
🤝
- Communicates by saying his own name
- Favorite food is special candies named after him
- Defeats his opponents by weakening them enough so they can be captured
- Inexplicably has a gig as a detective who helps kids solve crimes
🤝
- Communicates by saying his own name
- Favorite food is special candies named after him
- Defeats his opponents by weakening them enough so they can be captured
- Inexplicably has a gig as a detective who helps kids solve crimes
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Not so much out of fashion as de rigueur mortis
November 14, 2025 at 2:09 AM
Not so much out of fashion as de rigueur mortis
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Stop trolling the pope with jerseys challenge: impossible
Spike Lee presented Pope Leo XIV with a New York Knicks jersey on Saturday as the US pope welcomed film stars to the Vatican, where he called cinema a vehicle of hope ➡️ u.afp.com/Sn78
November 15, 2025 at 4:33 PM
Stop trolling the pope with jerseys challenge: impossible
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
The bloody neighbours have gone out and left John Cage’s 4’33 on full blast again.
November 15, 2025 at 8:36 AM
The bloody neighbours have gone out and left John Cage’s 4’33 on full blast again.
Reposted by St. Simeon the Pumpkin Spice Holy Fool
Pumpkin Spice Weirdness
November 15, 2025 at 4:12 AM
Pumpkin Spice Weirdness