Christweetpher
@mrceej.bsky.social
My city smells like Cheerios. Go Bills.
Recents: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:xrdqp6skddvkjfkj3eqwgh2d/feed/aaabb7xobyn3s
Recents: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:xrdqp6skddvkjfkj3eqwgh2d/feed/aaabb7xobyn3s
Pinned
Christweetpher
@mrceej.bsky.social
· Feb 8
I should really, but I just don’t want to
I can’t believe I missed Mother’s Day; I had so much drama saved up.
June 15, 2025 at 5:35 PM
I can’t believe I missed Mother’s Day; I had so much drama saved up.
I can’t really explain it but I can’t walk by a plant or tree without taking a little taste
June 13, 2025 at 9:59 PM
I can’t really explain it but I can’t walk by a plant or tree without taking a little taste
Reposted by Christweetpher
An avalanche, but it's Tupperware.
May 27, 2025 at 6:01 PM
An avalanche, but it's Tupperware.
Reposted by Christweetpher
Call me 007
0 likes
0 reposts
7 disappointed comments
0 likes
0 reposts
7 disappointed comments
March 12, 2025 at 9:34 PM
Call me 007
0 likes
0 reposts
7 disappointed comments
0 likes
0 reposts
7 disappointed comments
Reposted by Christweetpher
BREAKING: Entire Human Race Flagged By DEI Purge Because of “Homo” in “Homo Sapiens”
March 7, 2025 at 3:01 AM
BREAKING: Entire Human Race Flagged By DEI Purge Because of “Homo” in “Homo Sapiens”
Reposted by Christweetpher
Gonna swing by church later and see if anyone gave up something I want
March 6, 2025 at 2:42 PM
Gonna swing by church later and see if anyone gave up something I want
Reposted by Christweetpher
cop: say the alphabet backwards
me: the alphabet backwards
cop: you’re under arrest
me: no but you said—
cop: I didn’t say simon says
me: oh shit
me: the alphabet backwards
cop: you’re under arrest
me: no but you said—
cop: I didn’t say simon says
me: oh shit
March 7, 2025 at 12:58 PM
cop: say the alphabet backwards
me: the alphabet backwards
cop: you’re under arrest
me: no but you said—
cop: I didn’t say simon says
me: oh shit
me: the alphabet backwards
cop: you’re under arrest
me: no but you said—
cop: I didn’t say simon says
me: oh shit
Reposted by Christweetpher
Elvis Presley: uh huh huh
Elvis Depressley: uh boo hoo
Elvis Depressley: uh boo hoo
March 6, 2025 at 5:46 PM
Elvis Presley: uh huh huh
Elvis Depressley: uh boo hoo
Elvis Depressley: uh boo hoo
KEEP MICE OUT OF WOMENS SPORTS
March 6, 2025 at 5:49 PM
KEEP MICE OUT OF WOMENS SPORTS
Reposted by Christweetpher
WIFE: what’s for dinner?
ME: shepherd’s pie
WIFE: ooh yummy
[sudden knock at the door]
ME: do not answer that!
WIFE: what did you—
SHEPHERD: [from outside] GIVE ME BACK MY PIE
ME: shepherd’s pie
WIFE: ooh yummy
[sudden knock at the door]
ME: do not answer that!
WIFE: what did you—
SHEPHERD: [from outside] GIVE ME BACK MY PIE
February 28, 2025 at 12:59 PM
WIFE: what’s for dinner?
ME: shepherd’s pie
WIFE: ooh yummy
[sudden knock at the door]
ME: do not answer that!
WIFE: what did you—
SHEPHERD: [from outside] GIVE ME BACK MY PIE
ME: shepherd’s pie
WIFE: ooh yummy
[sudden knock at the door]
ME: do not answer that!
WIFE: what did you—
SHEPHERD: [from outside] GIVE ME BACK MY PIE
Reposted by Christweetpher
When newborns today are hungry they use Boober Eats. Thanks
February 27, 2025 at 5:26 PM
When newborns today are hungry they use Boober Eats. Thanks
Asteroid 2024 YR4 is no longer a threat to Earth, scientists say https://apnews.com/article/asteroid-2024-yr4-nasa-esa-cce39c01ab94ac1edae00024dc35169c?utm_source=dlvr.it&utm_medium=mastodon
Asteroid 2024 YR4 is no longer a threat to Earth, scientists say
Scientists have finally given the all-clear to Earth from a newly discovered asteroid. NASA and the European Space Agency said Tuesday that after two months of observations, scientists have almost fully ruled out any threat.
apnews.com
February 25, 2025 at 5:48 PM
Reposted by Christweetpher
WIFE: Our new neighbour is a bank manager but he seems to keep himself to himself
ME: He's kind of a loaner
WIFE: You need to move out
ME: He's kind of a loaner
WIFE: You need to move out
February 24, 2025 at 10:54 AM
WIFE: Our new neighbour is a bank manager but he seems to keep himself to himself
ME: He's kind of a loaner
WIFE: You need to move out
ME: He's kind of a loaner
WIFE: You need to move out
Reposted by Christweetpher
Are we still doing "if you see something, say something" b/c I been seeing a bunch of things
February 24, 2025 at 4:23 AM
Are we still doing "if you see something, say something" b/c I been seeing a bunch of things
Reposted by Christweetpher
Three hardest things
for a man to say:
1: I need help
2: I was wrong
3: Worcestershire Sauce
for a man to say:
1: I need help
2: I was wrong
3: Worcestershire Sauce
February 24, 2025 at 11:26 PM
Three hardest things
for a man to say:
1: I need help
2: I was wrong
3: Worcestershire Sauce
for a man to say:
1: I need help
2: I was wrong
3: Worcestershire Sauce
Three hardest things
for a man to say:
1: I need help
2: I was wrong
3: Worcestershire Sauce
for a man to say:
1: I need help
2: I was wrong
3: Worcestershire Sauce
February 25, 2025 at 4:04 AM
They don’t want us to fly
February 19, 2025 at 11:25 PM
They don’t want us to fly
Reposted by Christweetpher
Since everyone is asking;
Skee-Lo: wishes to be taller; wishes to be a baller
Skeet-Low: the feeling you get after browsing my timeline
I hope this clears things up
Skee-Lo: wishes to be taller; wishes to be a baller
Skeet-Low: the feeling you get after browsing my timeline
I hope this clears things up
February 16, 2025 at 11:57 PM
Since everyone is asking;
Skee-Lo: wishes to be taller; wishes to be a baller
Skeet-Low: the feeling you get after browsing my timeline
I hope this clears things up
Skee-Lo: wishes to be taller; wishes to be a baller
Skeet-Low: the feeling you get after browsing my timeline
I hope this clears things up
It does both. I was here yesterday, and it actually goes both ways.
February 17, 2025 at 5:03 PM
It does both. I was here yesterday, and it actually goes both ways.
Me to 8: counter tops are for glasses, not for asses
8 to another mom: my dad always says don’t shit on the table
8 to another mom: my dad always says don’t shit on the table
February 17, 2025 at 12:38 AM
Me to 8: counter tops are for glasses, not for asses
8 to another mom: my dad always says don’t shit on the table
8 to another mom: my dad always says don’t shit on the table
Reposted by Christweetpher
Business Ideas for Dogs:
Barker and Sons Paper Shredding
Clifford’s Cobbler Services
Mr Pickles Garbage Disposal
Freckles Feed and Fertilizer
WhosAGoodBoy Tailoring
Barker and Sons Paper Shredding
Clifford’s Cobbler Services
Mr Pickles Garbage Disposal
Freckles Feed and Fertilizer
WhosAGoodBoy Tailoring
February 5, 2025 at 1:05 AM
Business Ideas for Dogs:
Barker and Sons Paper Shredding
Clifford’s Cobbler Services
Mr Pickles Garbage Disposal
Freckles Feed and Fertilizer
WhosAGoodBoy Tailoring
Barker and Sons Paper Shredding
Clifford’s Cobbler Services
Mr Pickles Garbage Disposal
Freckles Feed and Fertilizer
WhosAGoodBoy Tailoring