JonBenét Lambsy
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lambelly.com
JonBenét Lambsy
@lambelly.com
Living and eating burritos

Detroit

Lambwaffle elsewhere
Pinned
The problem is that you can try to suck every ape's dick, but eventually you run in to one who is unable to cum and encounter a halting problem sort of situation.
Reposted by JonBenét Lambsy
Today in 1988 Mystery Science Theater 3000 premiered on KTMA in St. Paul Minnesota. #MST3K
November 24, 2025 at 2:14 PM
Doing a deep clean of my foster room in hopes of getting more fosters who will shit all over the place.
November 24, 2025 at 5:58 PM
I'm going to use these when the Jesus people in the park approach me and try to give me their pamphlet
I just found this old picture of a poster that was on the wall at the school my friend taught at and there’s some incredible stuff in there
November 24, 2025 at 2:37 PM
ELIMINATE THE MEATS
Fuck those pies
with charity and goodwill, i must here part ways with rolls.
November 24, 2025 at 5:08 AM
You guys think we could form a more perfect union? This one's pretty much shit.
November 23, 2025 at 10:10 PM
Reposted by JonBenét Lambsy
help me get the word out about how this cis man is preying on trans people’s vocal dysphoria! 💀

tiktok post live now:
Please repost & share this to get the word out about how @Seattle Voice Lab allegedly had their work stolen by this creep. ☹️ I bought a book from him before figuring out he was a cis grifter. Did th...
TikTok video by Sage 🏳️‍⚧️
www.tiktok.com
November 23, 2025 at 6:51 AM
Reposted by JonBenét Lambsy
*rfk jr. voice*

and this is why you retain your semen. every seed release is like you're getting aged by the potential lifespans of all the little sperm coming out.
July 31, 2025 at 4:00 AM
Inshallah
I wouldn’t say things are getting better yet. And things will probably get quite a bit worse before then.

But days where the energy on here can only be described as “how we’ll all feel when It Finally Happens” are becoming more frequent.
November 22, 2025 at 2:15 AM
My car's manufacturer just sent an email trying to sell me an update to my car's navigation for $100 like this was 2002 or some shit.
November 21, 2025 at 9:18 PM
Reposted by JonBenét Lambsy
Sos: urgent plea!!! If you are someone you know has been considering adopting a dog and you have patience and love to give, please, please, please consider this sweet boy.
November 21, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Smaller, older dog has been limping. The vet found a tumor. They're doing tests. Maybe cancer.
November 20, 2025 at 7:10 PM
So, on Dark Shadows recently Burke Devlin who has been living out of a hotel since episode 1 has given up his quest to destroy the Colins family in a very anti-climactic resolution.
an easily-overlooked detail in this piece: Musk appears to be living out of a hotel suite these days, which strikes me as a subtle but important indicator of where he is in his personal Howard Hughes arc

www.nytimes.com/2025/11/18/u...
Musk Is Back in Politics. Does He Want to Stay a While?
www.nytimes.com
November 20, 2025 at 10:16 AM
TERFs have always been anti-feminist.
At least it's honest, right? Intrusive questioning of women who don't conform to norms about how they should look, and women then being banned if they tell their inquisitor to mind his own sodding business, has always been the logical end point for the patriarchal project that is TERFdom.
November 20, 2025 at 10:13 AM
For reasons beyond my understanding like 80% of Google news is from Twitter.
November 20, 2025 at 1:19 AM
Maybe SOME British people are ok.
November 19, 2025 at 3:58 PM
Rosemary is a complicated herb
November 19, 2025 at 3:28 AM
I cannot walk outside without texting my neighbor as she owns an aggressive dog she cannot control.
November 18, 2025 at 2:41 AM
Reposted by JonBenét Lambsy
Most of the shirt designs I have done are and will remain single, limited run. That's what's what I like to do.
But some designs I've done have been so popular that people never stop bugging me about them, and they've been bootlegged 100s of times. So
rawpaw.ink/collections/...
March 20, 2025 at 8:17 PM
Gonna have a quinceñera for this beagle next year. Need to start thinking about her dress
November 17, 2025 at 8:59 PM
Reposted by JonBenét Lambsy
The Salvation Army are a hate group. Do not forget that this winter.
November 17, 2025 at 5:04 PM
Americans so afraid of universal healthcare they’ll try to market a weird savings account as a smart alternative.
Health Savings Accounts are so unappealing to me. I don't need a debit card to buy q-tips. I need an MRI.
November 17, 2025 at 8:12 PM
S0, on chess dot com they have these instructor bots you can play chess with, but it doesn’t record the game? Like, you can review it right then, but only right then as it isn’t saved anywhere. Kind of a pain.
November 17, 2025 at 7:25 PM
Freezer drawer wont close
November 17, 2025 at 8:41 AM
Reposted by JonBenét Lambsy
I got federal charged for dancing across the street from ICE in my neighborhood on Indigenous People's Day. Here is the feds evidence photo they are using against me in court.
I really really need a good lawyer but I cant afford one.
Cash app $cozca
Venmo @cozca503
Working on a go fund me.
November 15, 2025 at 12:32 AM
I'm the future artificial intelligence will analyze and clean my filthy ass
I don’t blame them. In order for the bidet to work properly you really do have to zero in directly on the binger
November 16, 2025 at 10:30 PM