Flexible Panda
@flexiblepanda19.bsky.social
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I don't want to be dramatic but I think my office chair is trying to kill me
January 23, 2025 at 3:48 PM
I don't want to be dramatic but I think my office chair is trying to kill me
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This means Vine is coming back, right?
January 19, 2025 at 6:01 AM
This means Vine is coming back, right?
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seems hardly the time for a gender reveal but ok
January 11, 2025 at 11:22 PM
seems hardly the time for a gender reveal but ok
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in the article of former North Carolina Congressman Patrick McHenry:
January 3, 2025 at 5:05 PM
in the article of former North Carolina Congressman Patrick McHenry:
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The comic on the first page of my 2025 calendar 😌
December 10, 2024 at 5:25 PM
The comic on the first page of my 2025 calendar 😌
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When you ask Italian’s about Luigi Mangione
December 9, 2024 at 8:02 PM
When you ask Italian’s about Luigi Mangione
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"We've never seen this level of operational sophistication," a NYPD spokesperson says regarding the still-at-large United Healthcare Assassin. Notes that NYPD officers have "been driving around" and "gone to every Shake Shack in the city" and would "probably" do so again around lunchtime on Sunday.
December 8, 2024 at 5:21 AM
"We've never seen this level of operational sophistication," a NYPD spokesperson says regarding the still-at-large United Healthcare Assassin. Notes that NYPD officers have "been driving around" and "gone to every Shake Shack in the city" and would "probably" do so again around lunchtime on Sunday.
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Gone fishin’. Photo from my collection, 1968.
December 8, 2024 at 6:17 AM
Gone fishin’. Photo from my collection, 1968.
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Silent Night!
December 6, 2024 at 10:31 PM
Silent Night!
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The CEO of an amoral health insurance company has been assassinated, leading to celebrations from an angry populace, moral debates, and a citywide manhunt. Critics are calling it "preachy Oscar bait that wades into heady topics without much to say about them". 49% on Rotten Tomatoes.
December 6, 2024 at 3:04 AM
The CEO of an amoral health insurance company has been assassinated, leading to celebrations from an angry populace, moral debates, and a citywide manhunt. Critics are calling it "preachy Oscar bait that wades into heady topics without much to say about them". 49% on Rotten Tomatoes.
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see you in hell
December 4, 2024 at 3:03 PM
see you in hell
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*watching James Blunt mouth "not you" to me after singing You're Beautiful in concert*
December 4, 2024 at 2:00 PM
*watching James Blunt mouth "not you" to me after singing You're Beautiful in concert*
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It used to be that you bought a product and that was it, you got what you paid for, now you buy a product and it can be years of updates before it hits the sweet spot, that one glorious update where design and functionality comes together in perfect harmony.
And then the next update fucks it.
And then the next update fucks it.
December 1, 2024 at 12:44 AM
It used to be that you bought a product and that was it, you got what you paid for, now you buy a product and it can be years of updates before it hits the sweet spot, that one glorious update where design and functionality comes together in perfect harmony.
And then the next update fucks it.
And then the next update fucks it.
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A really treasured Twitter moment for me was that I used to follow a guy who did live action role playing as an elf man, and one day he got super into defending Johnny Depp and when I was like “whoa calm down live action role playing elf man!” he asked me for a formal apology
November 30, 2024 at 10:55 PM
A really treasured Twitter moment for me was that I used to follow a guy who did live action role playing as an elf man, and one day he got super into defending Johnny Depp and when I was like “whoa calm down live action role playing elf man!” he asked me for a formal apology
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what is wisdom?
November 30, 2024 at 3:43 PM
what is wisdom?
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I feel pretty good until I have any thoughts
November 30, 2024 at 11:59 PM
I feel pretty good until I have any thoughts
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Nancy Panel By Ernie Bushmiller
November 28, 2024 at 2:40 PM
Nancy Panel By Ernie Bushmiller
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Helpful hotlines today:
1-800-BUTTERBALL - for your Turkey
1-800-662-3263 (Ocean Spray hotline) - for your cranberry sauce
1-800-CALLFBI - for your annoying insurrectionist cousin
Happy Thanksgiving.
1-800-BUTTERBALL - for your Turkey
1-800-662-3263 (Ocean Spray hotline) - for your cranberry sauce
1-800-CALLFBI - for your annoying insurrectionist cousin
Happy Thanksgiving.
November 28, 2024 at 12:28 PM
Helpful hotlines today:
1-800-BUTTERBALL - for your Turkey
1-800-662-3263 (Ocean Spray hotline) - for your cranberry sauce
1-800-CALLFBI - for your annoying insurrectionist cousin
Happy Thanksgiving.
1-800-BUTTERBALL - for your Turkey
1-800-662-3263 (Ocean Spray hotline) - for your cranberry sauce
1-800-CALLFBI - for your annoying insurrectionist cousin
Happy Thanksgiving.
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"Careful it's hot! It's hot!" But you don't move out of the doorway in time and I let go to spill the entire dish no one asked me to bring, a 60 qt stock pot full of boiling water and a completely unseasoned butcher shop pig's head that spins down the foyer making eye contact with every single guest
November 28, 2024 at 3:33 PM
"Careful it's hot! It's hot!" But you don't move out of the doorway in time and I let go to spill the entire dish no one asked me to bring, a 60 qt stock pot full of boiling water and a completely unseasoned butcher shop pig's head that spins down the foyer making eye contact with every single guest
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wife has no idea i know she’s poisoning my food. i still love her. happy that her and her boyfriend will enjoy a generous insurance payout after i die
November 27, 2024 at 7:31 PM
wife has no idea i know she’s poisoning my food. i still love her. happy that her and her boyfriend will enjoy a generous insurance payout after i die