@emersonhex.bsky.social
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this is what im calling January 6th from now on
April 30, 2025 at 10:29 PM
this is what im calling January 6th from now on
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what the absolute fuck is she doing. this should be disqualifying and michigan voters should call for a recall on her, she is an absolute fraud
Democratic Michigan governor, Gretchen Whitmer appeared at a Trump rally and expresses how grateful she is and thanks Trump while speaking at the event.
She's selling out her state to fascism.
She's selling out her state to fascism.
April 30, 2025 at 12:47 AM
what the absolute fuck is she doing. this should be disqualifying and michigan voters should call for a recall on her, she is an absolute fraud
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Time to get those legs summer-ready 🪒
April 29, 2025 at 7:34 AM
Time to get those legs summer-ready 🪒
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(In relation to kneecap walking back their bits) I was supporting Hamas
a cartoon character from the simpsons says i was saying boo turns
ALT: a cartoon character from the simpsons says i was saying boo turns
media.tenor.com
April 29, 2025 at 5:11 AM
(In relation to kneecap walking back their bits) I was supporting Hamas
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- i mean yes, that is anatomically correct.
- as a matter of astronomy, yes, correct.
- evolutionary biology, also correct.
- spiritually, correct.
Checks out. ✔️ 💯
- as a matter of astronomy, yes, correct.
- evolutionary biology, also correct.
- spiritually, correct.
Checks out. ✔️ 💯
my 7-year-old just informed me that we're all made from four things:
- skeletons
- stardust
- monkeys
- love
- skeletons
- stardust
- monkeys
- love
April 28, 2025 at 4:51 AM
- i mean yes, that is anatomically correct.
- as a matter of astronomy, yes, correct.
- evolutionary biology, also correct.
- spiritually, correct.
Checks out. ✔️ 💯
- as a matter of astronomy, yes, correct.
- evolutionary biology, also correct.
- spiritually, correct.
Checks out. ✔️ 💯
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Black people on my timeline completely unsurprised by the verdict. White media elites are taken aback by it. Probably a lesson there.
December 9, 2024 at 5:19 PM
Black people on my timeline completely unsurprised by the verdict. White media elites are taken aback by it. Probably a lesson there.
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here’s a comic about smiling
December 6, 2024 at 1:01 AM
here’s a comic about smiling
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and now, a report from the Seven Stories Bureau of Statisticians and Analytics
December 5, 2024 at 3:39 PM
and now, a report from the Seven Stories Bureau of Statisticians and Analytics
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Oh man, this really got me. 😭❤️
December 5, 2024 at 2:25 AM
Oh man, this really got me. 😭❤️
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Did…did a minotaur write this
November 25, 2024 at 11:09 AM
Did…did a minotaur write this
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if you were considering being mean to me, don't bother. i spent all weekend watching old episodes of weird racist public access tv shows from 30 years ago. nothing can hurt me worse than what i've chosen to do to myself.
December 1, 2024 at 11:54 PM
if you were considering being mean to me, don't bother. i spent all weekend watching old episodes of weird racist public access tv shows from 30 years ago. nothing can hurt me worse than what i've chosen to do to myself.
Any advice on where to publish random thoughts like a blog? After 2 years of madness I feel the earth is finally shifting and I would like to put random thoughts and memories down. Is it better to write or just put on something like twitch. I don't know if I have the energy to type 😂
December 1, 2024 at 11:47 PM
Any advice on where to publish random thoughts like a blog? After 2 years of madness I feel the earth is finally shifting and I would like to put random thoughts and memories down. Is it better to write or just put on something like twitch. I don't know if I have the energy to type 😂
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Dime bag crushed peppers. Waldo’s Pizza
November 30, 2024 at 7:41 AM
Dime bag crushed peppers. Waldo’s Pizza
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Hi just wanted to say thanks to everybody for signing up for The Onion this weekend. It is very nice to be a part of a member-supported business where our readers seem genuinely happy with what they're getting and what we're doing with their money. Thank you for telling your friends. Just thank you.
November 30, 2024 at 10:29 PM
Hi just wanted to say thanks to everybody for signing up for The Onion this weekend. It is very nice to be a part of a member-supported business where our readers seem genuinely happy with what they're getting and what we're doing with their money. Thank you for telling your friends. Just thank you.
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Cat: You don't understand, you must let me out into the world, I yearn to be free and unfettered by domesticity
Same cat five minutes later: WHY DID YOU BANISH ME TO THE FROZEN REALMS OF THE OUTER WORLD THERE IS NOTHING BUT A WASTELAND THERE HOW DARE YOU SIR
Same cat five minutes later: WHY DID YOU BANISH ME TO THE FROZEN REALMS OF THE OUTER WORLD THERE IS NOTHING BUT A WASTELAND THERE HOW DARE YOU SIR
November 30, 2024 at 10:53 PM
Cat: You don't understand, you must let me out into the world, I yearn to be free and unfettered by domesticity
Same cat five minutes later: WHY DID YOU BANISH ME TO THE FROZEN REALMS OF THE OUTER WORLD THERE IS NOTHING BUT A WASTELAND THERE HOW DARE YOU SIR
Same cat five minutes later: WHY DID YOU BANISH ME TO THE FROZEN REALMS OF THE OUTER WORLD THERE IS NOTHING BUT A WASTELAND THERE HOW DARE YOU SIR
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Bizarre thing happened to me yesterday that my teenage self would not believe. I was playing at the gig to celebrate the life of the genius that was Neil Innes. Whilst waiting backstage to go on, Michael Palin sang the lumberjack song to me, in German.
November 29, 2024 at 3:26 PM
Bizarre thing happened to me yesterday that my teenage self would not believe. I was playing at the gig to celebrate the life of the genius that was Neil Innes. Whilst waiting backstage to go on, Michael Palin sang the lumberjack song to me, in German.
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have come to think of these blank ball caps for sale at the liquor store as “serial killer hats”
November 28, 2024 at 2:03 AM
have come to think of these blank ball caps for sale at the liquor store as “serial killer hats”
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