Sean David
@seandavidhasaknife.bsky.social
I’m just a guy, standing in front of a group of strangers, asking them to keep it down.
- Website builder
- Wordpress Developer
- Mediocre guitarist
- Okay listener
- Website builder
- Wordpress Developer
- Mediocre guitarist
- Okay listener
Y’all are worried about radioactive shrimp.
I’m worried about kaiju
We are not the same
I’m worried about kaiju
We are not the same
August 20, 2025 at 3:58 AM
Y’all are worried about radioactive shrimp.
I’m worried about kaiju
We are not the same
I’m worried about kaiju
We are not the same
Now’s probably a good time to bring up that you should immediately change your passwords after a nasty breakup.
June 6, 2025 at 5:29 PM
Now’s probably a good time to bring up that you should immediately change your passwords after a nasty breakup.
I think it would be helpful if local news sites had a list of bathrooms not to poop in because the door doesn’t lock.
April 24, 2025 at 7:24 PM
I think it would be helpful if local news sites had a list of bathrooms not to poop in because the door doesn’t lock.
Reposted by Sean David
Concerning New Study Finds Nation’s Poverty Growing Faster Than Officials Can Build Prisons
theonion.com/concern...
theonion.com/concern...
April 3, 2025 at 2:00 PM
Concerning New Study Finds Nation’s Poverty Growing Faster Than Officials Can Build Prisons
theonion.com/concern...
theonion.com/concern...
Reposted by Sean David
STOP 👏 USING 👏 THE 👏 PHRASE 👏 LET 👏 THE 👏 CAT 👏 OUTTA 👏 THE 👏 BAG 👏 CATS 👏 LOVE 👏 THE 👏 SHIT 👏 OUTTA 👏 BAGS 👏 I'VE👏 SEEN 👏 A 👏 CAT👏 HANG 👏 OUT👏 IN 👏 A 👏 BAG 👏 FOR👏 THREE👏 DAYS 👏 STRAIGHT 👏 DO 👏 YOUR 👏 DAMN 👏 RESEARCH!
March 27, 2025 at 6:11 PM
STOP 👏 USING 👏 THE 👏 PHRASE 👏 LET 👏 THE 👏 CAT 👏 OUTTA 👏 THE 👏 BAG 👏 CATS 👏 LOVE 👏 THE 👏 SHIT 👏 OUTTA 👏 BAGS 👏 I'VE👏 SEEN 👏 A 👏 CAT👏 HANG 👏 OUT👏 IN 👏 A 👏 BAG 👏 FOR👏 THREE👏 DAYS 👏 STRAIGHT 👏 DO 👏 YOUR 👏 DAMN 👏 RESEARCH!
Reposted by Sean David
Reposted by Sean David
*puts on thinking cap and immediately starts screaming*
March 5, 2025 at 11:30 PM
*puts on thinking cap and immediately starts screaming*
Reposted by Sean David
Analysis: Kanye tweeted that he loved Hitler, but there is historical evidence of what Hitler would have thought of Kanye, and the answer may surprise him.
February 8, 2025 at 6:18 PM
Analysis: Kanye tweeted that he loved Hitler, but there is historical evidence of what Hitler would have thought of Kanye, and the answer may surprise him.
Not sure why, but I smile a little bit when I see a Burger King is busy.
February 7, 2025 at 8:03 PM
Not sure why, but I smile a little bit when I see a Burger King is busy.
Reposted by Sean David
sorry i yelled 'five second rule" when you dropped your baby
February 6, 2025 at 7:21 PM
sorry i yelled 'five second rule" when you dropped your baby
“I know a LOT of big words. I just don’t use them because I don’t know what they mean.”
* me, flirting.
* me, flirting.
February 6, 2025 at 7:17 PM
“I know a LOT of big words. I just don’t use them because I don’t know what they mean.”
* me, flirting.
* me, flirting.
For anyone following me to see what thoughts are going through my brain, you should know…
my brain has gotten me absolutely nowhere.
my brain has gotten me absolutely nowhere.
February 6, 2025 at 6:59 PM
For anyone following me to see what thoughts are going through my brain, you should know…
my brain has gotten me absolutely nowhere.
my brain has gotten me absolutely nowhere.
Reposted by Sean David
I wash my legs when showering.
-Me flirting
-Me flirting
February 6, 2025 at 10:58 AM
I wash my legs when showering.
-Me flirting
-Me flirting
Reposted by Sean David
Are the next 4 years really going to be logging on everyday to sentences like "a 19 year old doge intern called Big Balls has your social security number" because I'm already at capacity for this sort of thing
February 3, 2025 at 4:29 AM
Are the next 4 years really going to be logging on everyday to sentences like "a 19 year old doge intern called Big Balls has your social security number" because I'm already at capacity for this sort of thing
My elderly mother’s favorite activity is eating at restaurants at odd times and commenting on their lack of business.
February 2, 2025 at 9:59 PM
My elderly mother’s favorite activity is eating at restaurants at odd times and commenting on their lack of business.
Reposted by Sean David
First they came for trans people,
I said nothing
because isn’t that their entire schtick?
Being really sexually repressed and jorking it to t porn and then cumming everywhere and getting mad at trans people about it?
When they came for me, there was no1 2 mop up all the cum 😔🙏🏻
-MARTIN NIEMÖLLER
I said nothing
because isn’t that their entire schtick?
Being really sexually repressed and jorking it to t porn and then cumming everywhere and getting mad at trans people about it?
When they came for me, there was no1 2 mop up all the cum 😔🙏🏻
-MARTIN NIEMÖLLER
February 2, 2025 at 5:36 PM
First they came for trans people,
I said nothing
because isn’t that their entire schtick?
Being really sexually repressed and jorking it to t porn and then cumming everywhere and getting mad at trans people about it?
When they came for me, there was no1 2 mop up all the cum 😔🙏🏻
-MARTIN NIEMÖLLER
I said nothing
because isn’t that their entire schtick?
Being really sexually repressed and jorking it to t porn and then cumming everywhere and getting mad at trans people about it?
When they came for me, there was no1 2 mop up all the cum 😔🙏🏻
-MARTIN NIEMÖLLER
Reposted by Sean David
INTERVIEWER: sell me this pen
ME: *holds pen up to interviewer's throat* buy this fucking pen or you'll never see your family again
ME: *holds pen up to interviewer's throat* buy this fucking pen or you'll never see your family again
January 28, 2025 at 2:18 PM
INTERVIEWER: sell me this pen
ME: *holds pen up to interviewer's throat* buy this fucking pen or you'll never see your family again
ME: *holds pen up to interviewer's throat* buy this fucking pen or you'll never see your family again
Reposted by Sean David
If you're at a concert and the singer holds the mic out and makes you sing the lyrics you should get some of your money back
January 26, 2025 at 5:20 PM
If you're at a concert and the singer holds the mic out and makes you sing the lyrics you should get some of your money back
Reposted by Sean David
ICE agents were forbidden from entering an elementary school in Chicago on Friday. Look I don’t like cops, but I do commend them for trying to further their education
January 25, 2025 at 12:39 AM
ICE agents were forbidden from entering an elementary school in Chicago on Friday. Look I don’t like cops, but I do commend them for trying to further their education
The wheel wells of my car are packed with ice, and I can’t help thinking how satisfying it would be to jump it like the Dukes of Hazzard right now.
January 19, 2025 at 6:05 PM
The wheel wells of my car are packed with ice, and I can’t help thinking how satisfying it would be to jump it like the Dukes of Hazzard right now.
Go ahead. Watch your TV. But don’t come crying to me when the shows you love abandon you.
January 15, 2025 at 11:25 PM
Go ahead. Watch your TV. But don’t come crying to me when the shows you love abandon you.
Reposted by Sean David
My avocado when I leave it on the counter for a day
January 15, 2025 at 2:52 PM
My avocado when I leave it on the counter for a day
Threads has become A weird form of LinkedIn.
January 14, 2025 at 7:11 PM
Threads has become A weird form of LinkedIn.