Ryan
ryansimmons.bsky.social
Ryan
@ryansimmons.bsky.social
Writer/director at Secret Base - youtube.com/SecretBaseSBN
Twitch - twitch.tv/ryansimmons6ft6
Pluribus (2025)
hey, my fellow hivemind partners and i noticed you from across the bar..... we were wondering if you'd wanna merge consciousnesses with us 😏
November 10, 2025 at 10:48 PM
Reposted by Ryan
the first cut of this video about steve kerr passing on the knicks had a lot more seth cursing into the microphone and muttering "never deserved him" over and over to himself, but @hachiozhang.bsky.social found a way to work around that. full piece here: www.patreon.com/posts/early-...
November 10, 2025 at 5:01 PM
Reposted by Ryan
you think podcasting is easy? i’d like to see you have two ideas a week buddy
November 10, 2025 at 8:06 AM
Reposted by Ryan
second verse on this is one of the funniest things i've ever heard
November 9, 2025 at 3:10 PM
Reposted by Ryan
Little known fact: when quarterbacks are looking at the card on their wrists in a high-pressure situation they are reading a little note that says “JUST BE YOURSELF. :)”
October 27, 2024 at 12:17 AM
Reposted by Ryan
no amount of state propaganda will ever convince me this man is my enemy
I for one will welcome our Chinese overlords #Beerjacket #China #Tsingtao
November 9, 2025 at 3:05 PM
Reposted by Ryan
Nah this is stolen fucking valor Tom Brady. There’s no fucking way you know who those three are
November 9, 2025 at 5:53 AM
Reposted by Ryan
Yes, let’s hear it for that classic moviemaking phrase, famously constructed exactly this way: That Is A Wrap!
June 12, 2025 at 12:16 AM
kind of a missed opportunity to scream at a flight attendant for being in the shot
NEW: I’m calling on Trump to cancel private jet flights instead of commercial airlines.

Private jet flights often take a single billionaire passenger, but still put real strain on our air traffic control system.
November 7, 2025 at 8:14 PM
I don’t torture people for entertainment. Please come to my theme park in Saudi Arabia.
November 7, 2025 at 1:34 AM
Reposted by Ryan
hey remember when Gary Payton and Vernon Maxwell went at each other with a chair and a dumbbell, respectively, and injured multiple teammates in the process

www.youtube.com/watch?v=TzS8...
Gary Payton won a lot in Seattle ... and beefed with almost everyone
YouTube video by Secret Base
www.youtube.com
November 6, 2025 at 5:11 PM
Reposted by Ryan
MrBeast hates Zohran because if people have access to basic necessities, it will demolish the Giving People Those Necessities As Part Of A Saw-Inspired Game Show industry
November 5, 2025 at 11:28 PM
Reposted by Ryan
“As you get older, you start to masturbate at home more. Less backstage and in other people’s hotel rooms while blocking the door.”
November 5, 2025 at 11:13 PM
Man we gotta bring back pillories and stocks, they seem perfect for shit like this
November 5, 2025 at 11:02 PM
Reposted by Ryan
Rudy Giuliani today
November 5, 2025 at 8:08 PM
Au revoir mes amis
Waving goodbye to all the billionaires leaving NYC after Mamdani becomes mayor
November 5, 2025 at 4:39 PM
Reposted by Ryan
November 5, 2025 at 12:59 AM
this is exactly how I handle my chicken tendies when I'm smacked at 2am
Chinese astronauts become the first to grill wings in space, paving the way for future uncstronauts
November 4, 2025 at 9:09 PM
Especially compared to the cynical and disgusting Cuomo AI bullshit, the Zohran videos have been endlessly inspiring, hopeful, and infused with joy for what’s possible. Never seen a campaign like it
Olivia took our whole team’s footage from the past year from all of us and made as powerful and beautiful a closing statement as we could ever ask for. This is a future we can win together, New York.
Today is only the beginning.

Our time has come, New York. Our time is now.
November 4, 2025 at 8:10 PM
Reposted by Ryan
My thoughts on today. For alt text, I link to my instagram post in the alt, because it is simply too long.
November 4, 2025 at 7:58 PM
literally every single day they give us another great reason to vote for Zohran Mamdani
November 4, 2025 at 7:16 PM
Reposted by Ryan
oh hey just gonna mention once more that @ryansimmons.bsky.social and I did a whole season of a podcast asking regular people about their experiences playing sports. It's subscriber-only, but we made the first episode with @jonbois.bsky.social available to everyone
November 4, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Reposted by Ryan
I've smelled things you people wouldn't believe. Submarines on fire off the shoulder of Onion. I sniffed hoagies toasting in the dark near the Mustard Gate. All those scents will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to cry.
Defense is now questioning Lairmore on cross-examination. They show a video still of the sandwich and wrapper on the ground, post-throw.

"Do you recognize that sandwich?" the attorney asks.

Lairmore won't confirm.

"I did not go back to collect it," he says.
November 4, 2025 at 4:36 PM
I live very near to NYC, and work there, and I cannot tell you how envious I am, unable to vote for someone I genuinely like -- and a socialist -- for friggin mayor of that place
November 4, 2025 at 4:36 PM
Reposted by Ryan
dick cheney was gooning on a 6 monitor setup playing porn compilations on a loop. the wildest stuff youve never seen. stuff that SHOULD have been ai, filmed at deep state black sites using kidnapped weta workshop guys to make prosthetics. he died from dehydration and stage three cummy tummy
November 4, 2025 at 2:07 PM