Mark Osterloh
@osterlohatlarge.bsky.social
Twitter refugee seeking asylum. Writer/senior comms chap looking for a new creative gig. Posts sometimes work related but whimsy often finds a way.
Pinned
Afternoon all. Just setting up this account on the assumption I will eventually leave the other place, which was mostly fun for 9 years, before a baby with a laser in a rocking chair took over…
December 1, 2025 at 8:27 PM
“… and you say I shouldn’t worry my pretty little head about this Horizon software you’ve loaded on my laptop?”
Why should you make a secret of your post office savings accounts, if you are marrying a good and honourable man?
November 26, 2025 at 9:34 PM
“… and you say I shouldn’t worry my pretty little head about this Horizon software you’ve loaded on my laptop?”
When, as part of my cloning experiments, I extracted DNA from a fragment of cloth stained with the blood of Dixon of Dock Green actor, Jack Warner, I never expected six uniform police officers to turn up at my door.
When I wrote my article about ignorance and law enforcement I never expected six uninformed police officers to turn up at my door.
November 22, 2025 at 2:10 PM
When, as part of my cloning experiments, I extracted DNA from a fragment of cloth stained with the blood of Dixon of Dock Green actor, Jack Warner, I never expected six uniform police officers to turn up at my door.
When I wrote my article about male strippers and full frontal nudity in theatres, I never expected six out of uniform police officers to turn up at my door.
When I wrote my article about ignorance and law enforcement I never expected six uninformed police officers to turn up at my door.
November 22, 2025 at 1:15 PM
When I wrote my article about male strippers and full frontal nudity in theatres, I never expected six out of uniform police officers to turn up at my door.
“Oh… you’re so big!”
“Why, thank you darling.”
“I was talking to the whale…”
“Why, thank you darling.”
“I was talking to the whale…”
November 14, 2025 at 8:38 AM
“Oh… you’re so big!”
“Why, thank you darling.”
“I was talking to the whale…”
“Why, thank you darling.”
“I was talking to the whale…”
Reposted by Mark Osterloh
Enjoy the Sunday caption contest. Give away ❤️s, retweet to encourage more competitors, include #GirlsOwnCC
October 26, 2025 at 6:02 PM
Enjoy the Sunday caption contest. Give away ❤️s, retweet to encourage more competitors, include #GirlsOwnCC
Dr Alex Comfort’s Joy of Sex was full of ‘em.
Books for adults should have a picture every now and then.
Tell me your most unhinged literary opinion, as a little treat
October 13, 2025 at 7:44 PM
Dr Alex Comfort’s Joy of Sex was full of ‘em.
Peaky Blinders II: The Wrath of Kiln.
Peaky Blinders: The Next Generation
October 2, 2025 at 7:02 PM
Peaky Blinders II: The Wrath of Kiln.
This reminds me of the time my ventriloquist neighbour had to dismantle his doll ahead of relocation to a new address.
I saw the arms, legs and parts of the head leave the house, but I didn't see the lips move...
I saw the arms, legs and parts of the head leave the house, but I didn't see the lips move...
VENTRILOQUIST: That was a terrible show! I think we need need to work on our timing...
DUMMY: Speak for yourself! I was hilarious... RS
DUMMY: Speak for yourself! I was hilarious... RS
October 2, 2025 at 1:03 PM
This reminds me of the time my ventriloquist neighbour had to dismantle his doll ahead of relocation to a new address.
I saw the arms, legs and parts of the head leave the house, but I didn't see the lips move...
I saw the arms, legs and parts of the head leave the house, but I didn't see the lips move...
Gonna chew me some gum and read me some words from @quantick.bsky.social’s latest tome. #AndOtherStories
September 4, 2025 at 9:51 AM
Gonna chew me some gum and read me some words from @quantick.bsky.social’s latest tome. #AndOtherStories
Using one photo already on your phone, what is the announcement tomorrow at 2?
September 2, 2025 at 8:11 AM
Using one photo already on your phone, what is the announcement tomorrow at 2?
@richardcoles.bsky.social have you departed the hell site formerly known as twitter? I’ve been slowly reducing my activity there but may bow out altogether as everyone I enjoy following seems to be moving here.
September 1, 2025 at 7:49 AM
@richardcoles.bsky.social have you departed the hell site formerly known as twitter? I’ve been slowly reducing my activity there but may bow out altogether as everyone I enjoy following seems to be moving here.
Never mind clamping down on cottaging in municipal spaces, what about all the weapons testing?
A Scottish council has officially banned arms companies and weapons manufacturers from using public parks to test their equipment
Scottish council bans arms testing in public parks
www.thenational.scot
August 22, 2025 at 8:11 AM
Never mind clamping down on cottaging in municipal spaces, what about all the weapons testing?
Slightly diminish a band:
Living In A Cricket Box.
Living In A Cricket Box.
Slightly diminish a band:
The Velvet Underground without Nico.
The Velvet Underground without Nico.
Slightly diminish a band: Orange Juice (from concentrate).
August 13, 2025 at 9:01 AM
Slightly diminish a band:
Living In A Cricket Box.
Living In A Cricket Box.
Take me down to the Paraglide City where the grass has several impact craters and the emergency services attend with alarming frequency.
Take me down to the parable city
Where the grass is green and in a funny way is a bit like life…
Where the grass is green and in a funny way is a bit like life…
Take me down to the paradox city where the girls are green and the grass is pretty.
August 10, 2025 at 1:56 PM
Take me down to the Paraglide City where the grass has several impact craters and the emergency services attend with alarming frequency.
Take me down to the Paradigm City where the grass is as green as you’d expect in most municipal spaces of this type.
Take me down to the palindrome city
Too hot to hoot
Too bad I hid a boot
Too hot to hoot
Too bad I hid a boot
Take me down to the parable city
Where the grass is green and in a funny way is a bit like life…
Where the grass is green and in a funny way is a bit like life…
August 10, 2025 at 1:32 PM
Take me down to the Paradigm City where the grass is as green as you’d expect in most municipal spaces of this type.
“Yes, Jamie, it is a big Labubu.”
Replace a word in a Doctor Who quote with "Labubu"
August 7, 2025 at 9:34 AM
“Yes, Jamie, it is a big Labubu.”
Got wordle in three a few days ago and inadvertently came up with a forgotten pop band from the 80s…
August 3, 2025 at 10:07 AM
Got wordle in three a few days ago and inadvertently came up with a forgotten pop band from the 80s…
Because they entered his apse without permission?
July 29, 2025 at 5:53 PM
Because they entered his apse without permission?
Could cause some conversational confusion if any members get elected:
“What’s your job?”
“Your MP.”
“No you’re not.”
“Yes I am. I’m in Your Party.”
“I don’t have parties. And I wouldn’t invite you if I did.”
“Misunderstanding?”
“I’m married and my surname is not Understanding!”
Etc etc…
“What’s your job?”
“Your MP.”
“No you’re not.”
“Yes I am. I’m in Your Party.”
“I don’t have parties. And I wouldn’t invite you if I did.”
“Misunderstanding?”
“I’m married and my surname is not Understanding!”
Etc etc…
Your Party? More like Yawn Party, amirite? Guys? guys?
a dirt road going through a desert landscape with mountains in the background
Alt: a dirt road going through a desert landscape with mountains in the background
media.tenor.com
July 24, 2025 at 1:11 PM
Could cause some conversational confusion if any members get elected:
“What’s your job?”
“Your MP.”
“No you’re not.”
“Yes I am. I’m in Your Party.”
“I don’t have parties. And I wouldn’t invite you if I did.”
“Misunderstanding?”
“I’m married and my surname is not Understanding!”
Etc etc…
“What’s your job?”
“Your MP.”
“No you’re not.”
“Yes I am. I’m in Your Party.”
“I don’t have parties. And I wouldn’t invite you if I did.”
“Misunderstanding?”
“I’m married and my surname is not Understanding!”
Etc etc…
To be honest, I’m not sure I like the direction this Cannon reboot is going in.
July 17, 2025 at 3:16 PM
To be honest, I’m not sure I like the direction this Cannon reboot is going in.
“Before I depart, I must say, what a delightful purring noise.”
“I know! It almost drowns out the sound of my cat. You’ll forgive me if I don’t stand up to see you out?”
#GirlsOwnCC
“I know! It almost drowns out the sound of my cat. You’ll forgive me if I don’t stand up to see you out?”
#GirlsOwnCC
Enjoy the Sunday caption contest! Include #GirlsOwnCC with your caption and give ❤️s to all the captions that amuse you. Retweets to encourage your followers to join in always appreciated.
July 13, 2025 at 6:14 PM
“Before I depart, I must say, what a delightful purring noise.”
“I know! It almost drowns out the sound of my cat. You’ll forgive me if I don’t stand up to see you out?”
#GirlsOwnCC
“I know! It almost drowns out the sound of my cat. You’ll forgive me if I don’t stand up to see you out?”
#GirlsOwnCC
Reposted by Mark Osterloh
Anyway, book launch. I may put money behind the bar. Or just my briefcase.
OFFICIAL BOOK LAUNCH!
7 August, AND OTHER STORIES.
I may read bits out loud, but there will be beer for sale.
7 August, AND OTHER STORIES.
I may read bits out loud, but there will be beer for sale.
July 11, 2025 at 6:05 AM
Anyway, book launch. I may put money behind the bar. Or just my briefcase.
The Needle and The Damaged Bum.
I was startled by Olivia Rodriguez' perineum cam and hope other stars lile Neil Young don't follow suit.
June 30, 2025 at 2:57 PM
The Needle and The Damaged Bum.