Dave Hemming
oracular.bsky.social
Dave Hemming
@oracular.bsky.social
Reposted by Dave Hemming
Toughest congressperson in America rears back for a punch, and refuses to cut short townhall, after asshole sprays her with something.
January 28, 2026 at 2:12 AM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
I UGLY laughed at this
January 28, 2026 at 12:32 PM
I've been doing Damp January. At the end of 2025 I needed a short course of antibiotics so I limited my alcohol intake quite sharply at a time of year when I'd usually indulge. I tried a whole bunch of different AF beers, and found a few I liked, so I bought loads and usually drink those now. /1
January 25, 2026 at 1:29 PM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
Democratic leadership is terrified of being seen on the side of the people of Minneapolis, least they lose the potential future support of pro-cop people whose support they do not and never will have.
I have been actively involved in protest movements for 24 years. I have never seen anything approaching this scale. Minneapolis is not accepting what's happening here. ICE fucking murdered a woman for participating in this, and all that did is bring out more people, from more walks of life.
January 22, 2026 at 10:53 AM
I never thought the leopards would eat our faces, sob demographic where 7 out of 10 voted for Trump.
To Their Shock, Cubans in Florida Are Being Deported in Record Numbers
www.nytimes.com
January 22, 2026 at 2:26 PM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
This is the future of pricing. Many grocery stores have been doing this, @ddayen.bsky.social has good reporting on this phenomenon/crime.
January 21, 2026 at 1:17 PM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
I got chiles
They’re multiplying
January 10, 2026 at 2:14 PM
Oh god
In "celebration" of thr Pepto Bismol ad now being on the radio, I took some popular radio-friendly songs and added the "Diarrhea" guy.
January 8, 2026 at 10:37 AM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
Open up this picture fully.

Then look at the surface of Mars.

Then look up to the top right.

Spot Mars' moon Phobos high in the sky.

Then notice the bright spot beside Phobos.

That's Earth.
December 30, 2025 at 9:30 PM
If you have 100 million pounds you can literally do anything you want from now until the day you die and still have more than you started with. Pass a bill that anyone with more than that is clearly mentally ill and should be forcibly committed and their assets above that applied to others care.
December 21, 2025 at 7:18 PM
I miss the days when I could connect my Google phone to my Windows PC and transfer files via USB. They don't let you do that any more, as far as I can tell. You have to do 100kb/s bluetooth transfers instead because fuck you. And yes, I've done all the 14 things it says to do when you google. Nope.
December 19, 2025 at 11:19 PM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
Here are the 28 Dem Senators who voted to advance the first federal ban on trans athletes & a federal definition of sex that would make trans & intersex people non-existent: Angela Alsobrooks (MD), Tammy Baldwin (WI), Richard Blumenthal (CT), Lisa Blunt Rochester (DE), Chris Coons (DE), ->
By a vote of 76-23, S 1071 passes the motion to proceed to the motion to concur. Won't know who voted for this until the roll call is uploaded, but safe to say it passed with the support of at least 24 members of the Democratic caucus. (Rand Paul probably voted nay and Steve Daines has been absent).
December 11, 2025 at 8:25 PM
We have 2 microchip cat feeders mostly so the neighbour cats don't eat their food but also so we know if one isn't eating. The dumb one always sits at the other one's feeder for ages before giving up and trying hers. Now the smart one has started sitting at the dumb one's. They're messing with me.
December 16, 2025 at 7:06 PM
CTO in latest meeting: "I know people hang on to specific words I say and go, 'oh that means this' or 'it means that' - it doesn't mean anything."

Not sure he meant to be that honest about senior management briefings.
December 16, 2025 at 1:50 PM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
Quoted here we have Sharron Davies talking about an FoI filed by the Women's Rights Network.

None of the people who committed these crimes were trans. Not one.

4.8% were cis male staff.
December 10, 2025 at 9:00 AM
"Anyone who missed the call on code security needs to complete this online course on Data."

"What if I was on the call but playing Candy Crush on my phone instead of paying attention?"
December 10, 2025 at 10:49 AM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
“I bring you fun”
“I bring you sunshine”
“I bring you love”

The Three Morecambe and Wise Men.
December 9, 2025 at 6:58 AM
My mother-in-law has dementia and while she was over for Sunday dinner we watched Mortimer & Whitehouse: Gone Fishing. She can't remember what we talked about 5 minutes ago but she knew Teddy's the dog and Bob's the novice and it's telly she can enjoy. Wonderful. www.mortimerandwhitehouse.co.uk
Mortimer And Whitehouse Gone Fishing | Mortimer And Whitehouse
BB2 Mortimer and Whitehouse: Gone Fishing, Bob Mortimer and Paul Whitehouse mortimerandwhitehouse.co.uk
www.mortimerandwhitehouse.co.uk
December 8, 2025 at 1:02 PM
Watching Mortimer and Whitehouse Go Fishing always increases the "love you" to and from my spouse cos they're lovely blokes
December 5, 2025 at 12:20 AM
Reposted by Dave Hemming
Not rude things, a thread:
December 1, 2025 at 11:45 AM
If there is an afterlife, some people still won't go anywhere because there's just nothing inside them.

We should stop putting those people in charge of shit.
November 26, 2025 at 9:09 PM
Remember, being truthful in a relationship is important.

Her: What, do you think there's a washing fairy that does all your washing for you?
Me: Well... Yeah.
a man in a red and white striped shirt is saying no no not like that
ALT: a man in a red and white striped shirt is saying no no not like that
media.tenor.com
November 20, 2025 at 10:23 PM
Congratulations #Scotland for qualifying for the #WorldCup. What a goddamn roller coaster of a match. I laughed, I cried, I actually clapped the last goal. Emotionally drained and I'm not even Scottish. Genuinely thought they were going to fuck it up AGAIN.
November 18, 2025 at 10:21 PM
*chef's kiss* 10/10 no notes
November 18, 2025 at 4:30 PM
Takes all the benefits of living in the UK and as soon as he has to give back he fucks off. Deep down he knows that even the people he calls friends despise him.
🗣️ "I’m worth £780m at 37 — and I’m leaving Britain for Dubai"

Herman Narula, founder of Improbable, doubts he’ll be the last tech entrepreneur to depart
I’m worth £780m at 37 — and I’m leaving Britain for Dubai
Herman Narula, founder of Improbable, doubts he’ll be the last tech entrepreneur to leave the UK
www.thetimes.com
November 16, 2025 at 6:22 PM