Clarence Patton
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cpattonnyc.bsky.social
Clarence Patton
@cpattonnyc.bsky.social
Born and raised in Philly, live in Brooklyn...and so, so exhausted.

Si paratus maneres, te ipsum paratum non necesse est.
Reposted by Clarence Patton
Rutte prolly told him he was really, really pretty.
January 21, 2026 at 7:36 PM
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Pete Hegseth is a cartoon character come to life in a dangerous world.
January 21, 2026 at 1:02 PM
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Remember, it's not just the initial rush of the day. Pace yourself. We've also got a solid month or two of Serious People impotently tut-tutting about how bad you are for celebrating. It'll be like the Puritans trying to ban Christmas.
We've all rehearsed for Trump dying so many times we won't know what to do when it actually happens
January 21, 2026 at 6:54 AM
You need to try harder, J.D.
Trump rapid response: "After takeoff, the AF1 crew identified a minor electrical issue. Out of an abundance of caution, AF1 is returning to Joint Base Andrews. The President and team will board a different aircraft and continue on to Switzerland."
January 21, 2026 at 4:11 AM
Dumbass, of course he's not your Mayor, not only do you not live in NYC, you don't live in NYS or the US...in fact you don't live in the Northern fucking Hemisphere...or the Western Hemisphere...GTFOH, a kangaroo wants to punch you in the face. #StuntQueens
January 21, 2026 at 3:51 AM
You KNOW she would.
Sally Hemings would like a word
January 21, 2026 at 3:05 AM
LOLz. Hoisting...petards, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera.
January 21, 2026 at 2:37 AM
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Police chief details persistent criminal misconduct by ICE officers.
Brooklyn Park police chief Mark Bruley: "We're hearing people being stopped with no cause & being demanded to show paperwork to determine if they're here legally. We started hearing from our police officers the same complaints. Every one of these individuals is a person of color... it has to stop"
January 20, 2026 at 6:47 PM
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Well done!
BREAKING

A federal judge STRIKES the words "United States Attorney" from Lindsey Halligan's signature and warns that he will refer her to disciplinary proceedings if she persists in calling herself one.

Doc buff.ly/JvTKLlD

Background buff.ly/Ay2iB6u
January 20, 2026 at 6:35 PM
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Wait...isn't this the same Gubbanah who's been rolling over and over and exposing his belly like a tickled puppy lately?
January 20, 2026 at 6:34 PM
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Not sure why my governor is being a scold unless he's yelling at billionaires, not European leaders. He needs to yell at billionaires more, including the California tech billionaires backing Trump and his rampages.
>> @governor.ca.gov Gavin Newsom to world leaders and billionaires at Davos: It’s time to buck up. Stop being complicit. Have a backbone. Trump will play you for fools.
January 20, 2026 at 6:08 PM
😂😂😂😂
January 20, 2026 at 5:08 PM
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I went to go look for Census data this morning and.... y'all. #econsky
January 20, 2026 at 11:49 AM
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WHOSE parents have 5-12 homes? My parents, who are doing way better than I ever will, have ONE home.
Bessent: "Someone, maybe your parents for their retirement have bought 5, 10, 12 homes."
January 20, 2026 at 4:42 PM
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Meanwhile, City Journal be like:
January 20, 2026 at 4:41 PM
This coming from the Dumbass in Chief doesn't surprise me. He's an ignoramus and a vainglorious idiot. BUT, that no one on staff said, "We cannot send this out. It makes him look as small as he is...also Norway doesn't control the Nobel Committee and also Norway ≠ Denmark" speaks volumes.
January 20, 2026 at 4:23 PM
For the sake of all the fucks that ever fucked in Fucklandia.

Dude: "Here's an idea to honor MLK: a sneaker in the color of the sign for the hotel where he was assassinated."

Other Dude: "That is such a cool idea!!! I not now, when? If not Nike, then whomst?"
we have completely lost the plot with the marketing of the legacy of MLK. Column soon.
January 19, 2026 at 8:02 PM
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This is 100% correct and the EU should do it immediately.

The USA will break if a bunch of entitled Americans suddenly can’t book get-aways in Paris.
90 day suspension of US tourist visas and this is all over
January 19, 2026 at 5:50 AM
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This is so smart. I’m so impressed with all the different ways you’re helping your neighbors.
January 19, 2026 at 12:19 AM
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Minneapolis and Saint Paul have basically mobilized into a war economy of mutual aid and non-violent defense. I’ve never seen anything like it, even during Covid. People who barely vote are guarding their schools from ICE and doing the shopping for neighbors in hiding.
This is so smart. I’m so impressed with all the different ways you’re helping your neighbors.
January 19, 2026 at 12:39 AM
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A Texas district in which Black students were allegedly taunted with monkey noises.

An Arizona school where students admitted saying “slavery is good.”

These are some of the incidents Trump’s Education Department has ignored:
Monkey Sounds, “White Power” and the N-Word: Racial Harassment Against Black Students Ignored Under Trump
Since Trump returned to office, the Education Department’s civil rights office has not resolved a single racial harassment investigation. It sends a message that “people impacted by racial discriminat...
www.propublica.org
January 19, 2026 at 4:00 AM
A beautiful act of actual Christianity.

And a correction: demands for justice don't disrupt worship. They ARE worship. Jesus came to disturb the comfortable. These people and these actions belong in Christ's house. And faith without works (good works to be specific) is dead.

#JesusTakeTheWhip
January 19, 2026 at 3:03 AM
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Fresh off an Eagles playoff loss? ICE does not want this heat
I've heard rumors that Philadelphia is next for the ICE invasion after Minneapolis.
Maybe I'm wrong, but
1) More than 11% of all ICE agents are in Minneapolis, and they've utterly failed to pacify the city.
2) Philly is 5x the size of Minneapolis.
3) "Minnesota nice" is a thing. We don't have that.
January 18, 2026 at 9:55 PM
Ya' think? Some of us fucking told y'all...contemporaneously to its creation.

But folks in the US (and definitely not all demographics) love to freak out and overreact about threats real, imagined, and manufactured.
‘Maybe DHS Was a Bad Idea’
Two decades after its founding, the department has become what its critics feared.
www.theatlantic.com
January 18, 2026 at 8:01 PM
And here's the tea: comeuppance is gonna be a motherfucker.
Black Women Turn to One Another as Their Career Paths Suddenly Recede
www.nytimes.com
January 18, 2026 at 6:29 PM