Kobe Bryant
@ancientprawns.bsky.social
Let the hero born of woman crush the serpent with his heel.
Pinned
Kobe Bryant
@ancientprawns.bsky.social
· Nov 17
Lord make me holy… RIGHT FREAKIN’ NOW!
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
to Taco Bell, where I did dine, and then to Dollar Tree, where I beheld a great Variety of wares, and did furnish myself with divers small items, before returning home
January 19, 2026 at 12:35 AM
to Taco Bell, where I did dine, and then to Dollar Tree, where I beheld a great Variety of wares, and did furnish myself with divers small items, before returning home
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
Had the devil on me kind of a lot the last few days
January 18, 2026 at 9:31 PM
Had the devil on me kind of a lot the last few days
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
Happy 11th anniversary of me losing my fucking mind over this QVC clip
January 18, 2026 at 2:45 PM
Happy 11th anniversary of me losing my fucking mind over this QVC clip
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
today’s #birdoftheday theme is #twoofakind
here are two curious american white pelicans swimming up to say good morning #birds #pelicans #cuties
here are two curious american white pelicans swimming up to say good morning #birds #pelicans #cuties
January 18, 2026 at 2:24 PM
today’s #birdoftheday theme is #twoofakind
here are two curious american white pelicans swimming up to say good morning #birds #pelicans #cuties
here are two curious american white pelicans swimming up to say good morning #birds #pelicans #cuties
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
watch carefully the predawn hours: shadow-cloaked stagehands move in silence to set the scene of the coming day
January 18, 2026 at 1:04 PM
watch carefully the predawn hours: shadow-cloaked stagehands move in silence to set the scene of the coming day
It’s so funny to me that PTA manifested Lockjaw
literally the villain in every movie ever
January 18, 2026 at 1:42 PM
It’s so funny to me that PTA manifested Lockjaw
I got a 5 year journal and I think I might actually stick with it this time
January 17, 2026 at 8:26 PM
I got a 5 year journal and I think I might actually stick with it this time
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
Memento Maury. Remember you are not the father
January 17, 2026 at 4:18 PM
Memento Maury. Remember you are not the father
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
Democrats need to set up a special tribunal system to systematically and efficiently prosecute every member of the government involved in any of this. Not just prosecuting the worst offenders or the leaders. Everyone. Set up special courts and expedited rules and then throw away the key.
January 16, 2026 at 9:37 PM
Democrats need to set up a special tribunal system to systematically and efficiently prosecute every member of the government involved in any of this. Not just prosecuting the worst offenders or the leaders. Everyone. Set up special courts and expedited rules and then throw away the key.
I fear I’ve made “objects shaped like creatures” too much my brand as a gift-giver… afraid to send my SIL the Emotional Support Chicken I am knitting for her
January 16, 2026 at 7:53 PM
I fear I’ve made “objects shaped like creatures” too much my brand as a gift-giver… afraid to send my SIL the Emotional Support Chicken I am knitting for her
I never liked Gavin Newsom—quite the opposite—but I have occasionally liked other dems. I sort of think the time for that is over
January 16, 2026 at 3:22 PM
I never liked Gavin Newsom—quite the opposite—but I have occasionally liked other dems. I sort of think the time for that is over
Tormented by dipshits: the Ancient Prawns and everybody else story
January 16, 2026 at 1:20 PM
Tormented by dipshits: the Ancient Prawns and everybody else story
You have been visited by the Beast of Peace. May you be fortified by her warm heft
January 16, 2026 at 1:44 AM
You have been visited by the Beast of Peace. May you be fortified by her warm heft
Please pray for my friend
It has unfortunately come to my attention that @pnwdude18.bsky.social recently passed away. He was a kind, funny, insightful person, and a good friend. Please pray for the repose of his soul.
January 15, 2026 at 10:53 PM
Please pray for my friend
Dear God… Please let this year’s Bill Callahan album be as good as Shepard in a Sheepskin coat. I don’t deserve it but I am asking anyway. Amen
January 15, 2026 at 12:51 PM
Dear God… Please let this year’s Bill Callahan album be as good as Shepard in a Sheepskin coat. I don’t deserve it but I am asking anyway. Amen
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
The Big Owl by Jan Mankes, 1913.
January 15, 2026 at 12:39 PM
The Big Owl by Jan Mankes, 1913.
Dissolve ICE
Restitution them into bankruptcy
Throw them in jail for life
Restitution them into bankruptcy
Throw them in jail for life
January 15, 2026 at 12:36 PM
Dissolve ICE
Restitution them into bankruptcy
Throw them in jail for life
Restitution them into bankruptcy
Throw them in jail for life
Next year I think I am gonna get into the Sufjan Stevens Christmas albums
January 15, 2026 at 12:10 PM
Next year I think I am gonna get into the Sufjan Stevens Christmas albums
Man. They could take everything away
January 14, 2026 at 10:21 PM
Man. They could take everything away
Reposted by Kobe Bryant
Yep, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation,
January 14, 2026 at 9:05 PM
Yep, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation,
Got a doozer of a tummyache I’ll tell you that much
January 14, 2026 at 8:21 PM
Got a doozer of a tummyache I’ll tell you that much
Gonna get yelled at at work today. Woohoo!
January 14, 2026 at 3:04 PM
Gonna get yelled at at work today. Woohoo!
I believe I shall use it to make this sweater
January 14, 2026 at 2:40 AM
I believe I shall use it to make this sweater