Dear God, please don’t let my sons die in some ridiculous civil war. 🙏
God: *WWIII…
God: *WWIII…
October 17, 2023 at 11:49 AM
Dear God, please don’t let my sons die in some ridiculous civil war. 🙏
God: *WWIII…
God: *WWIII…
I’m sorry you didn’t like my attitude but it’s also not fair to expect me to always be drunk.
October 16, 2023 at 9:20 PM
I’m sorry you didn’t like my attitude but it’s also not fair to expect me to always be drunk.
Reposted by A_AronKing
Them: Try to look approachable
Me:
Me:
October 4, 2023 at 12:11 AM
Them: Try to look approachable
Me:
Me:
Reposted by A_AronKing
Honesty: for when you want people to stop liking you.
October 14, 2023 at 6:53 PM
Honesty: for when you want people to stop liking you.
Reposted by A_AronKing
Girl math is deleting the well thought out response and replying with an emoji instead
October 12, 2023 at 12:48 AM
Girl math is deleting the well thought out response and replying with an emoji instead
Reposted by A_AronKing
Me, sexting: Well, that seems implausible.
October 14, 2023 at 6:50 PM
Me, sexting: Well, that seems implausible.
What’s the right amount of alcohol to tolerate a 14yo sleepover but not have your children taken by the state…
October 14, 2023 at 4:44 PM
What’s the right amount of alcohol to tolerate a 14yo sleepover but not have your children taken by the state…
Do unto others?…seriously? Huh. I thought the golden rule was don’t talk to strangers?
October 14, 2023 at 2:37 PM
Do unto others?…seriously? Huh. I thought the golden rule was don’t talk to strangers?
Reposted by A_AronKing
This day in history. 1926. Winnie-the-Pooh was published. You see, the 1920s was a simpler time when children's authors didn't need a sense of humour.
October 14, 2023 at 10:00 AM
This day in history. 1926. Winnie-the-Pooh was published. You see, the 1920s was a simpler time when children's authors didn't need a sense of humour.
Me and my humility doing another end zone dance.
October 14, 2023 at 1:55 PM
Me and my humility doing another end zone dance.
Reposted by A_AronKing
Judge me all you want, I don’t care what you think.
October 11, 2023 at 2:32 PM
Judge me all you want, I don’t care what you think.
I’d like to apologize for how aggressive that fuck off sounded… I was shooting for a gentler fuck off.
October 12, 2023 at 12:16 AM
I’d like to apologize for how aggressive that fuck off sounded… I was shooting for a gentler fuck off.
Reposted by A_AronKing
Because you had a day off, it's a short workweek.
Don't worry, you still have a full week's worth of work to do.
Don't worry, you still have a full week's worth of work to do.
October 10, 2023 at 3:34 PM
Because you had a day off, it's a short workweek.
Don't worry, you still have a full week's worth of work to do.
Don't worry, you still have a full week's worth of work to do.
Reposted by A_AronKing
save money on an ice bath and just get married instead
October 10, 2023 at 6:11 PM
save money on an ice bath and just get married instead
We all need to pick one lie and believe it.
October 11, 2023 at 12:08 AM
We all need to pick one lie and believe it.
13yo- I didn’t turn in my work because the teacher didn’t tell us the bell was about to ring.
Me- do they not have clocks?
13- oh yeah…
Me- do you not understand how they work?
13- we’re too busy working…
Me- do they not have clocks?
13- oh yeah…
Me- do you not understand how they work?
13- we’re too busy working…
October 11, 2023 at 12:02 AM
13yo- I didn’t turn in my work because the teacher didn’t tell us the bell was about to ring.
Me- do they not have clocks?
13- oh yeah…
Me- do you not understand how they work?
13- we’re too busy working…
Me- do they not have clocks?
13- oh yeah…
Me- do you not understand how they work?
13- we’re too busy working…
I want to thank you for taking full responsibility for the situation while still clarifying it was everyone else’s fault.
October 10, 2023 at 11:55 PM
I want to thank you for taking full responsibility for the situation while still clarifying it was everyone else’s fault.
Reposted by A_AronKing
It was love at first lie.
October 5, 2023 at 12:48 AM
It was love at first lie.
Reposted by A_AronKing
Feelings are so high maintenance.
October 8, 2023 at 1:52 PM
Feelings are so high maintenance.
Setting an alarm for 345am should be illegal.
October 9, 2023 at 12:26 AM
Setting an alarm for 345am should be illegal.
Reposted by A_AronKing
Sorry I wrote “lame party” in the funeral guest book
October 8, 2023 at 10:49 PM
Sorry I wrote “lame party” in the funeral guest book